The Ruthless Billionaire

A Clean Billionaire Romance

The California Elite Series

Evangeline Kelly

Copyright © 2018 by Evangeline Kelly. All Rights Reserved.

No part of this book shall be used or reproduced in any form or by any means without prior written permission of the author. The Ruthless Billionaire  is a work of fiction. Names, places, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination and are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locations, or people, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Scripture quotations are from The ESV® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.  https://www.esv.org/resources/esv-global-study-bible/copyright-page/

Table of Contents

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Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Epilogue

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Chapter 1

Lucas

Base jumping off the Perrine Bridge in Twin Falls, Idaho, was not for the faint of heart. Sometimes people died. And sometimes that was the point.

I leaned against the railing overlooking the Snake River, the bluish-green water glimmering in the sunlight four hundred and eighty-six feet below. It was a favorite tourist spot, and most came for the view, some for the adventure, a few for the adrenaline rush. But me? I came to escape the daily pressures my father laid on my shoulders.

The kind of pressures only a billionaire’s son would understand.

I might be recognizable back in Los Angeles, but here in Idaho, no one even gave me a second glance. And that was just as I would have it. The last thing I needed was the media catching wind that Lucas Armstrong was around. I wanted to do this on my own today—without televised witnesses.

My heart pounded an unsteady rhythm as I glanced from side to side. A man and a woman walked by holding hands, but they didn’t look my way. Most on this bridge were tourists like myself, and I didn’t appear too conspicuous. Not yet, anyway.

A sign nearby said: Need hope? Call . . . It listed a number, but I didn’t recite the digits in my head. Why bother? Hope wasn’t something tangible you could hold on to. It was smoke and mirrors . . . an illusion. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Heart beating faster, I puffed up my cheeks and blew out the air, jumped in place to psych up the nerve to do this, wrung out my arms and rolled my neck a few times. 

The cold morning air chilled my skin. Adrenaline pulsed through my veins, and I felt it like a rush of wind against my face. I wiped my clammy hands on my legs and tried to ignore the nervous jitters in my belly. The growing anticipation of what I was about to do stole my breath and pressed down upon my throat until I knew I had to get this over with or I’d chicken out.

Rising up on my toes, my stomach pitched as I climbed over the railing and stared down at the enormous drop. A wave of dizziness swept over me, standing on that ledge, heart nearly beating out of my chest now, hands gripping the railing like a lifeline.

My eyes widened as I took in the scene of the snake-like river surrounded by land on both sides. One wrong move and I would plummet to the ground below. But then again that was the point of this little escapade.

Still, I didn’t want it to come as a surprise. It needed to be on my terms. When I was ready.

A small inner voice urged me to give in to the fear and walk away from this bridge, to listen to my gut. To go home.

It was almost comforting in a way; a reminder that despite what most people thought, I wasn’t a cold emotionless robot. I had emotions like everyone else even though most of the time I tried to numb those feelings. It was how I coped with life, how I dealt with the responsibilities that had been thrust upon me against my will.

A man could have everything the world had to offer and still feel empty. And that was why I’d come to Idaho. To this bridge. And why every bone in my body knew I had to do this even though I didn’t want to. 

I readied myself, breath nearly choking in my throat, knees almost buckling from the tension. Spreading my arms out like a bird, I leaned forward.

And then I jumped.

Chapter 2

Lucas

Free-falling through the air . . . It was surreal. Like a dream. Like a fantasy in my head. But the force of the wind against my body was a tangible reminder that this was no dream. Gravity yanked me down, down, down.

I counted to myself . . . one-thousand-one. One-thousand-two. Before I even reached one-thousand-three, I considered . . . If I didn’t pull my chute, everything would end. Could I do it?

I pulled my parachute and immediately my descent slowed. I floated now, and my heart steadied though I wasn’t out of the woods yet. Scanning the horizon, I allowed myself a moment to take in the beauty of the river and the canyon and the deep blue sky.

When my feet touched the ground, my shoulders slumped forward now that the pressure was gone, and my body tingled with the sensation only an adrenaline rush could deliver. I was safe and everything was fine. The rush, the high . . . It was over. That was all it had been. And now . . .

Time to go home. Back to the grind, to the relentless pace of L.A.

Base jumping was something I did now and then. My dad didn’t understand it, but he chalked it up to reckless youth and didn’t say anything most of the time. If he knew how dangerous it was, he might have tried to convince me to stop. Not because he cared. Not because he worried about my safety. But because he would’ve seen it as an inconvenience. Cleaning up a mess wasn’t on his to-do-list.

If anything, he grumbled more over my skydiving activities because I did it more often, and it occasionally interfered with work.

People thought skydiving was the more precarious sport because you fell out of a plane, jumping from heights of up to fifteen thousand feet. One man had even made a record of jumping from one hundred and twenty-eight thousand feet. But most didn’t realize that skydiving was fairly safe. The chances of dying were on par with getting struck by lightning. You had time to think, to deal with a situation gone wrong. With base jumping you had seconds—now that was dangerous.

If your chute got tangled in your feet, you were a goner. You needed a minimum of two hundred skydiving jumps under your belt before you could even learn to base jump.

But the rush was something else, and it was the one thing that kept me sane these days.

I caught the ferry to shuttle out of the canyon since climbing would have taken too much time. The private plane I’d chartered was scheduled to take off in a couple of hours, and I needed to get back to Los Angeles.

Once I boarded the plane and settled in, I stared out the window and tried to ignore the sinking sensation in my stomach. My escape to Idaho was over and it was time to face reality again.

Time to face my responsibilities.

Time to find a wife.

The thought made me queasy. I didn’t let people get close—never had. Somehow, I had to convince one of the women on my father’s list to marry me, while at the same time making it clear I wanted separate lives. Most women had preconceived ideas about marriage, such as falling in love and other stupid notions along those lines. My father’s demand that I find a pre-approved wife in order to inherit his real-estate empire was ridiculous, but it was all about image for him. He wanted everyone to see me as a family man because it was good for business.

Ironically, our family had never been close, and we hated being around each other most of the time.

I’d resigned myself to the fact that I had to go along with this because my father had made it clear there was no other way, at least in his mind. So, considering I did whatever he asked, I’d have to pull out the charm and woo the next woman on the list since the first had already shot me down.

The plane landed in L.A. at three in the afternoon. I took my carry-on and headed to the front of the airport where my driver, Sam, picked me up in a black limousine.

“Good day, Lucas. How was your trip?” He was an older man in his late fifties with a receding hairline and gray hair.

“It was fine.” I shut the partition separating the driver from the passenger seat so I’d have privacy. My phone rang, and I closed my eyes for a second to gather my wits before answering. “Hi, Dad.”

“I take it you’re back from Idaho?”

“Yeah. Driving to the office now.”

“Good. You have a meeting with Henry Townsend at four. You need to put on your A-game with this one. He’s hesitant to sell to us.”

“Got it. I haven’t forgotten the appointment.”

“We need that land. It’s prime property for our next office building. We should be able to get companies willing to pay a high monthly rent because of the location. Make sure you do what it takes to secure the deal.”

“I will. I understand how important this is.”

“Good. Don’t let me down.” He cleared his throat. “Speaking of letting me down, you really botched things up with Alexa.”

My ex-girlfriend, Alexa, had been first on my father’s approved list to marry. She was beautiful, from a good family, had money. Only problem was she’d fallen for Dylan West, a lowlife artist who struggled to make ends meet—the last guy I’d expected to see her with. It was embarrassing that she’d picked him over me, but that was another story. I wasn’t exactly brokenhearted or anything. Alexa was a nice girl, but I’d never had feelings for her.

I sunk down in my seat and pinched the bridge of my nose. “Do we have to talk about her? That wasn’t my fault.”

“It was your fault. You didn’t pursue her hard enough. I told you how to take Dylan down, but you stalled and now it’s too late.”

“Whatever,” I mumbled.

I’d done my due diligence by using my private investigator to show Alexa the kind of man Dylan was, only she hadn’t cared, not even when I showed her a picture of Dylan engaged in a fight. It appeared she actually loved him. And that was a testament to how love made people do stupid things.

Dad had wanted me to take unscrupulous action to destroy Dylan’s reputation in an attempt to win Alexa over. He’d wanted me to use the photographs my investigator took to get Dylan kicked out of a contest at Coastal Heritage Museum. I’d made a lot of threats to Dylan, but in the end, I’d refused to go further than showing Alexa the pictures. Maybe I actually had a conscience, but it seemed Dad didn’t—obviously. I’d never known him to have one. 

“You’d better start caring if you want to take over,” Dad yelled. He blew out a loud breath into the phone and started coughing. He didn’t sound good, but he hadn’t for a quite a while now.

“Are you all right?”

“I’m fine.” There was a pause, and it sounded like he was sipping water. “On to the next. Hillary Fineman is vacationing in Kauai and I’ve heard through the grapevine she was pleased you and Alexa broke up.”

I rolled my eyes and tipped my head back, staring up at the ceiling of the vehicle. “Can’t I skip her and go to the third on the list? Our break-up didn’t end well, and she’s too high maintenance for my taste.”

She and I dated during a brief separation from Alexa. Hillary was . . . How would I describe her? Beautiful? Yes. Self-absorbed? Absolutely. But that hadn’t bothered me—I could be self-absorbed as well. It went along with the money and the lifestyle. What I couldn’t tolerate was her constant chatter about unimportant things. Conversation with her was like dying a slow death of complete boredom. Not to mention, she’d wanted me to love her, and I couldn’t do that. I’d never loved any woman, and that wasn’t about to change anytime soon.

“She wants too much,” I said. “Wants what I can’t give.”

“What are you talking about?” Dad cleared his throat again and muffled another cough. “Start making sense. I don’t have a lot of time here.”

“She wanted me to love her, and I can’t . . .”

He laughed, and it sounded almost wicked . . . like how a villain in an old movie would laugh. It would have been funny if it had been a joke, but Dad never joked around. “You don’t have to love her,” he said. “You just have to make it seem as if you do.”

So that was the secret of his unhappy marriage to my stepmother, Sharon. No surprise there. No one ever accused them of living in wedded bliss, least of all me.

“I’m not an actor. If I don’t like someone, it’s obvious.”

“Well, then I suggest you hire an acting coach,” he bellowed, “because this isn’t going away.”

He was yelling into the phone, so I lifted it a few inches from my ear. Standard practice when it came to talking on the phone with Dad.

“If you don’t convince one of the women on the list to marry you, your inheritance will be in jeopardy. Alexa would have been perfect, but now that she’s not an option, Hillary is second best. She’ll look good enough on your arm, even if she’s a big spender. The other three . . .” He chuckled. “Let’s just say the other three will be a lot harder to persuade, and you’ve never even met them.”

“Fine. I’ll convince Hillary to marry me.”

“Good. Get on it right away. Now, there’s another matter we need to discuss.”

I shook my head in disbelief and pinched the bridge of my nose again. His demands just kept coming. “What’s that?”

“You need to make an appearance at Coastal Heritage Museum this evening for Dylan’s award ceremony. We don’t want anyone to think you’re holding a grudge.”

“You can’t be serious—”

“Put in an appearance. You don’t have to stay long.”

“No, I’m not doing it.”

“You will go.” His voice held a quiet, lethal tone to it. “You will represent the Armstrong family. Do you hear me?”

If I defied him, he’d make my life a living nightmare. He’d done it before, and even as sick and frail as he was now, I wouldn’t put it past him to do it again.

“Fine. I’ll make an appearance.”

“Good.” He hung up without saying goodbye as he always did.

I rested my head against the back of the seat and sat quietly for the next few minutes, trying to calm the growing anger. Dad manipulated people like puppets, and I was just another puppet to him since we’d never had a warm father-son relationship.

Maybe I should have jumped without the parachute back in Idaho.

***

“Thank you for meeting with me.” I looked Henry Townsend directly in the eye. “I believe we can come to an agreement we’ll both be pleased with.” I wrote down a sum on a piece of paper and slid it across the table.

Henry took the paper and his eyes widened.

We sat in my office, and I tapped a pen on my desk as I waited for Henry’s response. He stared out the floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking downtown Los Angeles. The view was amazing since Dad had given me one of the best offices in the building. Of course, that came with a price.

“This is much more than I anticipated.” He glanced away. “It’s not the offer that concerns me. The amount is more than I expected for the land, but . . .” He trailed off, appearing slightly dismayed.

“What is your concern, Mr. Townsend? How can I make you feel more comfortable with this decision?”

“Well, you see . . .” He shifted in his chair. “My mother made me promise before she died that I’d sell the land to someone who promised to use it for altruistic purposes.” He chuckled uneasily. “But she didn’t realize how much this land is worth.”

“Can you expand on that a little more?”

“She wanted that land to be used in a way that would help the community in some way. Something like low-income housing or maybe a park or senior citizen center.” He glanced at me. “You haven’t said what you plan to do with the property.”

I frowned for a millisecond and then schooled my features before he noticed. “Construction on an office building will begin immediately. After that, I’ll rent to prospective businesses.” Only to those who can afford the price. “But if it makes you feel better, I’ll make sure to give non-profits first choice. I can promise you that.” I tried not to wince at the last statement. It was mostly true. Well, it was true only as long as that “altruistic renter” was willing to pay top dollar. This was business after all.

“How can I be sure you’re telling the truth?” Mr. Townsend asked.

“I’m a man of my word.” The words flowed easily from my lips. It was just something you said during a business transaction. I reached across the table and extended my hand. “Do we have a deal?”

The corners of his mouth tipped up just slightly. “We do.”

We shook on it, and I told him I’d have my attorney contact him with the paperwork. I was good at sizing people up, and Henry Townsend was easier than most, despite Dad’s concern. He wanted to honor his mother’s wishes, but, most of all, he wanted the money. All he needed was a little reassurance that everything would be handled in the right way. He wouldn’t read the fine print, and he’d forget about an “altruistic buyer” once the deal was finalized and he had his money.

As for me, my main concern was pleasing Dad. Once this contract was in the bag, I’d have another notch on my belt. That would go a long way towards keeping him off my back.

Chapter 3

Aria

Santa Monica’s Third Street Promenade was buzzing with the kind of activity that only Southern California could provide. Not that I’d ever traveled outside of California to fact-check that declaration, but I assumed it was true.

It was a favorite hang-out for young adults wanting to shop or eat out with friends. At night, street performers cluttered the streets and made things even more interesting.

I performed there on a regular basis, playing my violin for a little extra cash. But this afternoon, performing was the last thing on my mind. When I noticed a group of rowdy teens sitting in a circle on the ground, laughing and smoking cigarettes, I headed over to see if they had any information that would help me find my brother.

“Hey, have any of you seen this guy?” I held up a flier with a picture of Chase. It was taken four years ago, but I imagined he looked the same.

A girl with a partially shaved hairstyle shook her head. “Nope. Haven’t seen him.” She went back to talking with the guy next to her. Everyone else ignored me, but I wasn’t ready to give up just yet.

“You,” I said, pointing to a guy with long wavy brown hair. “Do you recognize him?” I held the flier closer to his face. “He’s a lot taller than me, maybe six feet by now, has dark brown hair that looks almost black . . . blue eyes.”

He shrugged and shook his head. “Sorry, haven’t seen him.”

The guy next to him leaned in and took a good look at the picture. “I think I saw him yesterday at the shelter on Olympic. It has to be the same guy.”

My breath caught in my throat. “Are you sure?”

He nodded. “Yeah. Pretty sure.”

“Do you know if he’s still there?”

He lifted a shoulder. “No. We never spoke, but like I said, he looks familiar.”

“Thank you for your time.”

I knew exactly where that shelter was. It was only a mile away, and taking the bus would only delay things, so I broke into a steady jog. Holding back tears of hope, I put on my tough face and told myself over and over that it was most likely just a mistake. That guy probably thought he looked familiar, but everyone said that, and there was a good chance his tip wouldn’t pan out. I’d followed so many false leads over the years that I’d almost grown immune to the inevitable dead end. Still, each and every time, a part of me hoped this would be it—that I’d find Chase, and we’d finally be reunited.

About five years ago, Chase and I had been placed in foster care. After our first placement fell through, we were separated and placed in different homes. We’d only been able to see each other once a week during visitation. Over time, he’d changed from the sweet, loving brother I’d known my entire life into this cold, moody teenager who barely spoke to me. One afternoon, a social worker informed me that he’d run away, and they were trying to locate him.

They never found him, but they’d had several leads. A few of Chase’s former friends said they’d last seen him in Santa Monica.

It happened a few weeks after I turned eighteen and was all set to go to college for restaurant management, but when I received the news, I gave up my plans for the future. Instead, I started combing the streets in hopes of finding Chase. I got a part-time job as a waitress and played my violin to whatever crowd I could gather in order to make a little extra cash on the side. My expenses were minimal since I had a tiny studio apartment in L.A.—the rent in Santa Monica was far too expensive—and I didn’t have a car. When I wasn’t working, I spent the remainder of my time trying to find my brother.

The police had long ago given up. One of the officers told me Chase probably didn’t want to be found, and he might have been right about that. But I couldn’t stop looking for him. He was my only family, and I had to locate him.

I arrived at the shelter out of breath from running the entire way. Once I located a staff member, I showed her the flier and explained my situation. She told me she hadn’t seen him, and the little hope I had left began to slip.

“Please. Are you sure?” I asked, sounding desperate. “This guy on Third Street told me he saw him here.” Tears formed in my eyes even though I tried to hold them back. “He’s been missing for years. Can you just look at this flier one more time?”

She took a closer glance. “I’m sorry, but I would remember him if I’d seen him. He’s very handsome. No one like him has been to our shelter lately.”

My lower lip trembled, and I stared down at my feet, wiping my face with the back of my hands. I knew I looked pitiful, but I was tired of always having to hold it together. “I just hoped maybe this time . . .”

“Look, I’m not supposed to do this, but I feel bad for you. You can walk through the facility and see if you recognize anyone.” She glanced around. “It’s against protocol so please make it quick.”

Twenty minutes later, I left with my head ducked low. She’d been right. He wasn’t there, and I was back to the drawing board.

Lord, I don’t know how much longer I can do this. It’s too painful. Every time I get a false lead it hurts like crazy. I don’t know what to do.

As if God wanted to give me a quick answer, a thought occurred to me. I’d done all I could do. It was time to hire a private investigator, someone who was experienced with finding people.

All I needed was to set aside enough money. Maybe I could beg Danny for some additional shifts at the restaurant. He wasn’t the greatest boss, so I wouldn’t put all my eggs in that basket. Looking for a full-time job was most likely a better solution. I hadn’t looked because I liked having the extra time to search for Chase. But after four years, my efforts weren’t cutting it anymore. Hadn’t I heard somewhere that the definition of insanity was doing the same thing over and over again, expecting things to change?

With a new plan in mind, I headed over to a local coffee house down the street to meet my friend, Mason, there for lunch. The coffee shop had sandwiches and a few salads, so we often met there.

As soon as I walked in the door, I spotted him at a small table in the back. He was about an inch taller than me with light brown hair that swept over his forehead and full cheeks that gave him a baby face. We locked eyes, and he motioned for me to come over. I settled into the seat across from him and blew out a breath.

“What’s wrong?” he asked. “You look defeated.”

“I got a tip earlier that Chase was at the shelter on Olympic. Ran the whole way over, but he wasn’t there.”

“I’m sorry.” He glanced at me sympathetically and put his hand over mine.

The gesture felt too intimate, and I pulled my hand away, a knee-jerk response. Regret filled me the moment I saw the hurt in his eyes. He had feelings for me . . . as in more than friendship. He’d told me more than once, but I just didn’t feel the same.

We met at church several years ago, and Mason and I became fast friends. We got along and it had always been completely platonic, but a few months ago, he confessed he wanted more.

To be honest, I wish I felt something for him. He was a great guy, loved the Lord, was one of the most loyal friends I’d ever had. Plus, we had fun together. But there was no spark, no attraction on my end. He wasn’t a bad-looking guy, but there was no chemistry between us. At least, I didn’t feel chemistry. He was more like a brother than a boyfriend.

I’d told myself a thousand times it was because I was always worrying about Chase and wouldn’t allow myself the luxury of having a relationship. Maybe that was it. Perhaps over time, I’d come to see Mason the way he saw me. I didn’t want to hurt him, so I’d suggested we spend less time together, but he’d been adamant that he didn’t want to lose me as a friend.

“Sorry,” I said. “I’m a little jumpy today.”

“It’s okay.” He glanced away. “I ordered your regular: turkey on rye with chips and a bottle of water.” He pushed the meal across the table. “My treat.”

“Thank you.” I dug in my pockets and then handed him a ten-dollar bill.

He put it on the table and pushed it back. “It’s on me.”

An uncomfortable feeling settled in my stomach. “I can’t let you pay for me. It’s not right.” I pushed the money back into his hands.

He handed it right back with a big smile on his face. “Nope. It’s not often I get to see you. Let me take care of it.”

I put my hands on my hips and narrowed my eyes. “I see you every week, Mason.”

“Well, once or twice a week doesn’t feel like enough.”

“Take the money. I insist.”

“No, I insist,” he said.

For some reason, allowing him to buy my lunch made it feel like a date, and I didn’t want to give him the wrong idea. “Mason, let me pay for my own meal. I’m serious about this.”

“Fine.” He bit into his sandwich and chewed, looking at me with these huge puppy dog eyes that always got me right in the gut. “I wish you’d let me take care of you. You shouldn’t have to struggle this hard. That waitressing job barely pays your bills.”

Mason had a good office job in Santa Monica, but I didn’t want to take advantage of his kindness. “I’m fine. Money’s tight but I can handle it.”

He shook his head and smiled. “Always so independent. You should let others help once in a while.”

I shrugged. “Guess I’m just used to taking care of myself. It’s a byproduct of being on my own since I was eighteen.” 

He hesitated and looked at me for a long moment. I could tell something was on his mind, but I waited for him to speak while I bit into my sandwich.

“There’s something I’d like to ask you,” he finally said.

Shifting in my seat, I took a sip of water and glanced at him. “Okay.” Uneasiness washed over me. Please don’t bring up relationship issues again.

“I’d like to discuss our relationship.”

Ugh. He had to do it. I braced myself for the inevitable talk. “What exactly do you want to discuss?”

“I know we’ve talked about this before, but I’ve been praying about you and me a lot, and I believe we’d make a good couple. I think if you just try, you may be able to see me in a different light. You’re so used to us being friends, but what if you let me take you on a real date? It might change your outlook.”

My first response was to say no. I didn’t know if I’d ever see him the way he wanted me to even though I wished that wasn’t the case. But what if he was right? What if being on an actual date changed my perspective? I could try . . . Plus, he’d been such a good friend, I felt like I owed him that. “I suppose we can go on one date. I just don’t want to get your hopes up.”

He smiled so wide his entire face beamed. My heart broke a little in that moment. He wanted to be with me so badly, yet the more he showed interest, the more I wanted to back away. Sometimes life was so unfair. The problem was with me—I knew that. I hadn’t given him the chance he deserved.

“How about tonight?” he asked.

“I have to work and then I’m going to that ceremony at Coastal Heritage Museum.”

“What ceremony?”

“Remember I told you about that couple I met?”

“No, I don’t recall you saying anything.”

“I didn’t? I was performing by the Santa Monica Pier, and this woman named Alexa, and her boyfriend, Dylan, approached me. Apparently, Dylan had painted a picture of Alexa watching me perform one night, and he won a contest for the painting. Tonight’s the award ceremony. They invited me to attend.”

Mason looked disappointed, and I wondered if he’d even registered anything I’d just told him besides the fact that I wasn’t free tonight. “How about tomorrow then? I’ll take you to dinner.”

I nodded. “Sure. Tomorrow is fine.”

We finished our meal and then I took the bus to L.A. I had a shift scheduled at Mama’s Café, the restaurant I worked at. Ironically, Mama’s Café was not owned by a mother but by a man named Danny. His brother, Joe, managed the place while Danny sat in his office for long hours doing who knew what. Danny was actually the nicer of the two, but he rarely showed his face. More recently, morale amongst the employees was at an all-time low, partly because we all sensed one of us would be let go soon. It was inevitable considering business had been slow.  

The moment I walked into the café, I knew something was wrong. Joe looked at me with a sympathetic look, and then he glanced at Danny, who was actually out of his office for once. Danny tipped his chin in my direction, giving Joe some kind of signal.

“Aria,” Joe said, “I need to talk with you. Why don’t you come back with me to the office? Danny isn’t using it at the moment.”

A sense of foreboding washed over me as I followed him. He’d never asked to speak to me alone in the office before.

I settled into a chair, and Joe sat behind Danny’s desk, looking as if he enjoyed being the big man in charge.

He leaned back in the chair and rested his hands behind his head of reddish-brown hair. “I really hate to do this Aria, but I have to lay you off.”

I blinked, and even though I knew I should say something, the words got caught in my throat.

“You’ve been a stellar employee, and I’d be happy to give you a reference letter, but things have been slow around here. It was a hard decision but everyone else has more seniority.”

I finally found my tongue. “I wasn’t the last one hired.” He’d hired his girlfriend, Jill, a couple of months ago.

He glanced away and shifted in his seat. “She has more experience than you do, so we need her to stay.”

That was a bold-faced lie. “Jill told me this was her first job.” I didn’t want Jill to lose her job, but she lived with her parents, so she wouldn’t be destitute if she had to look for a new one. 

He shifted again and looked uncomfortable. “Uh . . . well, you know . . . um.” He picked up a stack of papers on the desk and straightened them. “The truth is, I can’t fire her. That would be the end of our relationship.” He brought his gaze to me. “I’m sure you understand.”

Anger surged through me, and I fought to maintain control. “How much notice are you giving me?”

“We simply don’t have the work.” He picked up an envelope and handed it to me. “Here’s your last check.”

My eyebrows flew up, and I stifled the urge to stand to my feet and yell. “You’re not going to let me work my shift today?”

He shook his head and wouldn’t make eye contact. “I’m sorry.”

This was so unfair. He’d hired Jill even though he knew business was slow. I didn’t have anything against her, but it was clear favoritism. Panic worked its way through my chest as reality sunk in. I needed this job. There was rent to pay . . . food, bills. I didn’t want to end up homeless again. During a difficult time in my life, I’d lost everything, and I didn’t ever want to experience that again.

“Please, Joe. Can’t you give me two more weeks? Just so I can look for something else?”

He shook his head firmly. “Can’t. This is how it has to be. We can’t afford to pay you for another two weeks. Sorry.” He didn’t look sorry at all.

I stood, and a frustrated retort was on the tip of my tongue, but I swallowed it because it was as if God reached down at that moment and enveloped me in a cloud of peace. The feeling was so strong and intense, it seemed the Lord was trying to make a point.

Everything would be okay. He was looking out for me, and whatever happened, I was in His hands. Peace was something I’d experienced many times in my life, but this was different. It was all-consuming, almost surreal. My entire body relaxed, and I turned and left with my last check in hand, feeling strangely confident that something better would come along.

And believe me, that was not how I normally thought. I’d gotten used to disappointment, and even though I tried to remain upbeat in front of everyone else, my thoughts weren’t positive all the time.

When I got home, I laid down on my bed, something I rarely ever let myself do mid-day. I was always mapping out my next move when it came to looking for Chase. There was a whiteboard on my wall with all the places I’d checked in the last few days. At the end of the week, I transferred the information from the board into a log where I wrote down each and every lead that came my way. I studied that log backward and forward, searching for anything that stuck out to me. But today, I let it all go and curled up into a ball.

My sleep was deep and restful, but, when I finally woke, I checked the time and sprung out of bed in a panic. I’d slept through dinner and had just enough time to dress and make it to the bus since I was running late. Doing my best to hurry, I ran my fingers through my hair and hoped it looked okay. I searched through my closet for something appropriate to wear to the ceremony and pulled out a black skirt I’d had for years. Pairing it with a simple white blouse, I stood in front of a mirror and sighed. It wasn’t great, but it would have to do. I doubted anyone would notice me, anyway. There was no time for makeup, so I washed my face and flew out the door.

I arrived at the bus stop just as the bus was leaving. Waving my arms frantically, I motioned for the driver to stop. Thankfully, he did, and I breathed out a short prayer, thanking God for that one mercy.

On the bus, I twisted my hands in my lap, wishing that peace I’d felt earlier would return. I had to find a job—fast. Existing paycheck to paycheck was hardly a way to live, but I’d made sacrifices in order to look for Chase. It seemed that God was confirming what I already knew. It was time to find full-time work.

When I finally arrived at the Coastal Heritage Museum, I was forty-five minutes late. Everyone was in a large room and a man was speaking up front about Dylan West’s accomplishments. There wasn’t a seat left, so I made my way to a separate banquet room where artwork was being displayed. I didn’t see the one Alexa had described to me, but I saw other paintings that appeared to be done by students and quite a few by the renowned artist, Fernando Ortega. People milled about, so it seemed I wasn’t the only one who didn’t make it in time for the speech.

I happened to glance at the doorway and a man wearing a black suit walked in. He was young, probably mid-twenties, a few years older than myself, and he had a striking appearance: dark brown hair, high cheekbones, full lips. His eyes, the shade of a Caribbean ocean, were so beautiful they were almost unreal. He had a certain self-assurance that drew my attention, an energy that pulled at me. I wasn’t the only one looking at him—women and men alike were staring. Maybe it was the way he walked. He carried himself with confidence as if he owned all the paintings in the room.

The man was beyond good-looking. In fact, good-looking wouldn’t even begin to describe him. He was so far beyond that, I didn’t know where to begin. He could easily have graced the cover of a romance novel . . . not that I had time to read much anymore.

I turned around and stared blankly at the painting in front of me, my heart beating a fast rhythm. Of all things that could happen today, being distracted by some man was the last thing I needed. I had other priorities to focus on. Things like getting a job so I could save up money to hire an investigator, not to mention pay my rent. It would be due in a couple of weeks.

Without realizing what I was doing, I turned to look at him again and caught his profile. He was studying a painting, hands in his pockets, a forlorn expression on his face. What was that about? A part of me wanted to go over and talk to him, but the other part—maybe the saner part—knew that wasn’t a good idea. I didn’t have time for this, but I couldn’t stop looking at him. Men like him didn’t come around every day. At least not in my world.

A woman standing a few feet away caught me staring, and she smirked. “He’s very attractive, isn’t he?”

I nodded slowly. “Yeah . . . uh-huh.” I was making a fool of myself by gawking at him, but I couldn’t seem to stop.

“Better steer clear of that one,” she said. “I’ve seen him around. His father is wealthy and merciless, and from what I hear, the son is much the same.”

“How do you know?”

She shrugged. “It’s not a secret Howard Armstrong is on the board for this museum. His son, Lucas, shows up for events from time to time.” She smiled and moved on to the next painting.

Glancing at Lucas again, a strange curiosity swept over me. He had a cockiness about him that was slightly annoying. Any man who looked like him and had that amount of confidence probably had people at his beck and call. I wanted to tell him he wasn’t all that great—bring him down a notch. But knowing me, I’d start out with that intention and end up complimenting him instead.

Time to pull it together. I turned back to the painting I was standing in front of and attempted to push thoughts of this man out of my head. But that didn’t work, apparently, because I had this urge to go start a conversation with him. Since I never sought out handsome men, the thought was almost laugh-worthy. I just didn’t have the time for relationships. The only way I knew how to stop gawking at him like a fool was to make a promise I had to keep.

Okay, Lord, I’m giving you my word. I will not approach that guy. If you want me to talk to him, you’re going to have to bring him to me.

There . . . it was out of my hands now, and I could stop thinking about it. God would never bring him to me. That man was so out of my league, I knew he’d have no reason to approach me.

If I’d known at the time how dangerous a prayer like that could be, I would have fled that museum and gone straight home.

But I soon learned that you couldn’t put God in a box. He had a way of answering the most mind-boggling prayers.

Chapter 4

Lucas

Any time now the award ceremony at Coastal Heritage would finish and everyone would pour out into the banquet room. Good thing because I wanted to make sure the right people saw me so I could be on my way.

I would stay just long enough to put in an appearance and then I was out of here. 

It irked me that I had to represent the Armstrong family since I had better things to do than to try to convince everyone I didn’t hold a grudge against Dylan. Apparently, Alexa had told the museum’s board of directors that I’d had it out for Dylan because I wanted to marry her.

Whatever. They could all rot for all I cared.

Was it a blow to my ego that Alexa chose Dylan over me? Sure. But I hadn’t lost any sleep over it.

As far as representing the Armstrong family, I knew how to put on a show, reflect the persona my father wanted the world to see. Lucas Armstrong, heir to a billionaire empire, confident and sure of himself, leader of men. Afraid of no one. Quick to make decisions. No compassion . . . or very little. The kind of man men respected or at least stayed away from. The kind women flocked to . . . until they got to know me, and then they loathed the very ground I walked on.

That last bit wasn’t part of the persona. It was an unfortunate consequence that went along with being me.

And it was no badge of honor, by the way. I didn’t like that others shrank away from me, but it had been like that my entire life. I didn’t know how to be any different. People were drawn to me, and then they left. They always left.

I made a slow progression around the room, checking out each painting on display. Stopping in front of one by Fernando Ortega, I frowned. It was titled, Thoughts About Life, and it was a cityscape, from the view of a tall skyscraper. A man stood on the top of the building wearing a gray suit, hands in his pockets, looking out at the scene before him. He was close to the edge, and though you couldn’t see his face or his expression, I knew what was on his mind, or at least I imagined I did.

Something stirred inside of me, a memory from years ago, a time in my life I tried to forget. Sometimes a word or an expression or even a stray thought brought it all back. In this case, a painting was all it took.

There I was on the top of my father’s building in New York City, ready to make a permanent choice—the kind you could never take back.

Standing in front of this painting now, it felt as though a heavy black cloud encased me and kept me from moving, as if I couldn’t change my expression or blink or even turn my face. Like someone held my head and wouldn’t let me look away until I saw who and what I was. That man on the top of that building was me, and at that moment, I hated myself and the person I’d become. Hated the sadness and wretched emptiness that filled every inch of my pathetic life.

Turning, I ran a hand through my hair and blew out a heavy breath, my chest tight from the memories that flooded over me. This was stupid. I didn’t come here to be reminded of the past.

And just as I broke free of that moment, something—or to be more specific—someone caught my attention.

A woman studied a painting a short distance away, and something about her seemed familiar. How did I know her? I narrowed my eyes, trying to figure it out. Had I seen her at a party? No, that couldn’t be it. I would have remembered that black hair. It fell over her delicate shoulders, thick and smooth and shiny. Something about her was otherworldly: the way she held herself, graceful and strong. She shifted her petite frame as if feeling my eyes on her, but she didn’t turn to look at me. I watched her with unabashed interest, but, still; she refused to glance my way. Most women would have acknowledged me by now if they’d felt my gaze, and I was making it obvious that I wanted her attention. Stubborn girl.

Look at me. I wanted to see her face better, figure out exactly how I knew her. I closed the distance between us and cleared my throat. “Excuse, me. Do I know you?” The edge in my voice demanded her full attention.

She turned and her eyebrows flew up in surprise. Long lashes fluttered over blue eyes. A white blouse fit snug around her slender waist, and a black skirt hung loosely, just barely brushing the tops of her knees. The outfit was simple, but she wore it well.

“No. We haven’t met,” she said.

I stared at her for a few seconds as if trying to figure out a puzzle. I had seen this woman before . . . somewhere. Maybe we hadn’t met, but I recognized her.

“Did we go to high school together at Malibu Oak Prep? Is that where I know you from?”

She shook her head. “No, I never went there.”

“Then where have I seen you?”

She shrugged. “I have no idea. I haven’t seen you before today.”

And then it struck me. She was in a painting—Dylan’s painting. I’d seen it only because my father had called me the moment it surfaced for the contest, and the board of directors had taken notice. He’d wanted me to see for myself what stood between me and Alexa.

That painting won the contest, and Alexa was clearly the focus in it, but my eyes had wandered to the woman on the side playing the violin, her long black hair so beautiful it caught my eye.

“You were in Dylan’s painting . . . playing the violin,” I said, snapping my fingers. “I can’t believe you came this evening.”

“I was invited.” She cocked her head with a questioning look. “Alexa and Dylan told me I should come.”

“I didn’t mean that you shouldn’t be here. I’m just surprised you came, that’s all.”

“Why is that surprising? Doesn’t it seem natural that I would be here?”

“There’s nothing natural about you. A part of me thinks you’re a fairy or a ghost. Tell me you’re real.” Immediately after the words left my mouth I winced. Had I really just said something that cheesy?

She looked at me like I was odd, and, I had to admit, I sounded pretty strange right then, but there was something about her . . . I couldn’t put my finger on what it was. She was special in some way. I just didn’t know how. She lifted her arm and smiled. “Pinch me.”

“What?”

“Go ahead. Pinch my arm.”

I glanced around the room. No one seemed to notice us, so I leaned in closer and pinched her lightly. Her skin was warm and soft to the touch.

“All right. You’re real. Not a ghost.”

She smiled. “Now that we’ve settled that, excuse me while I finish looking at the rest of these paintings.” She turned and walked away abruptly, and the space where she’d stood felt empty and hollow once she was gone.

“Wait. Why are you leaving?”

No response from her. She was already halfway across the room, fleeing like a leaf in the wind.

I kept my eyes on her slight frame but didn’t chase after her. Still reeling from our exchange, I didn’t know what to make of it. Why did I find her so captivating? I couldn’t say, really. She was attractive, but not exceptionally so. She wasn’t tall and willowy like most of the women I dated. Her clothes weren’t the latest fashion, and she wore very little makeup if any. She was the opposite of the type I usually found myself attracted to.

One might have called her average, except that mane of luxurious hair was anything but. And those eyes . . . they held such innocence and wisdom, a complete paradox. But there was something else about her . . . something I couldn’t comprehend at the moment. It was like the tickle you couldn’t reach to scratch. I knew I was drawn to her, but I had no idea why and it bugged me.

My phone rang, and I almost ignored the call when I saw who it was from, but experience told me he wouldn’t quit calling until I answered. “Yes, Dad. What do you need?”

“How did it go with Townsend?”

“Good. He accepted our offer.”

“Splendid. Where are you now?”

“The museum. Where else would I be? You said I had to come.”

“Right. I almost forgot. Glad you didn’t.”

He hadn’t forgotten. It was his way of testing me to see how obedient I was. I’d learned a long time ago not to cross him. It just wasn’t worth it.

“By the way,” he said casually as if what he was about to say was a side thought. “I chartered a plane for you. Tomorrow, you leave for Kauai. Make sure you have a way to convince Hillary to marry you. It’s time you settle down—have a wife at your side.”

He meant: time you fit society’s image of a happily married man. That would never happen. At least the happy part.

“I’ll text you the details,” he said. And then he hung up.

Chapter 5

Aria

He spoke to me. I still couldn’t believe he spoke to me.

What, was I in junior high now? Aria, get a grip. Nothing had rattled me like that in a long time. Even losing my job earlier—I’d had so much peace wash over me. But an attractive man talking to me? I’d escaped like a nervous school girl.

What had I said to him? Excuse me while I finish looking at the rest of these paintings. What was wrong with me? My shoulders slumped forward because I knew exactly what was wrong. I’d been so nervous I didn’t know how to get out more than one sentence at a time. The man unnerved me, and my survival instincts kicked in—fight or flight. In this case, I flew. Oh well. It was for the best. I had other things I needed to focus on. I decided not to look at him to see what he was doing. It would only make me regretful for not hanging around longer.

My phone dinged with a text from Mason. Hey, I’m looking forward to taking you out to dinner tomorrow. Where would you like to go?

I typed out a quick response. Doesn’t matter. You pick.

Mason: I’ll come up with something. Can’t wait to see your beautiful face.

Me: Thank you. It will be good to see you again too.

He sent one more text with about five different types of hearts.

Seeing all those hearts made me feel . . . suffocated. Why couldn’t I be more excited about this? Instead, I had to get all worked up over a stranger, a man I didn’t even know. I studied my last response to Mason. Did that seem too eager? I didn’t want him to think I was eager, but at the same time, I didn’t want to hurt his feelings by sounding unenthusiastic. Maybe going to dinner with him was a bad idea.

A man cleared his throat, and I glanced up. It was him. The guy I’d spoken to earlier. Our eyes connected, and a shiver ran down my spine.

“It’s me again.” He smiled ever so slightly and handed me a napkin with two chocolate chip cookies. He nodded towards a refreshment table at the front of the room. “Got these for you.”

“Thank you.” I reluctantly took the cookies. “That was nice of you.”

He glanced down and scoffed, putting a hand at his chin. “If you only knew.” The words were mumbled and said so quietly he probably thought I didn’t hear.

But I had heard, and now I didn’t know what to think. If I only knew what? Even though that woman earlier had warned me about him, he seemed nice enough. His manner was respectful and nothing about him gave me the willies.

The noise level rose as people began trickling into the room. It appeared the ceremony was over, and small crowds gathered around the different paintings on display.

“You must think I’m strange,” he said. “That conversation we had earlier about you being a fairy or a ghost . . . Trust me, I’m not usually that awkward.”

He ran a hand through his hair, and I was momentarily distracted by the naturally curly waves and how his hair fell perfectly, yet haphazardly at the same time as if the wind had blown right through it.

“Um . . . no, you weren’t awkward—”

“Yes, I was. One moment I was looking at this painting, and the next, I saw you.” His eyes lingered on my face. “There was something about you. Anyway . . .” He shook his head to clear it. “Let’s start over. My name is Lucas Armstrong.”

He extended his hand, and I shook it. His grip was strong as his fingers closed around mine. A tingling sensation shot up my arm from his touch.

“I’m Aria. Aria Dasher.”

“Nice to meet you, Aria. How about if I start off with some normal conversation this time? How was your day?”

“How was my day? Uh . . . It was a day.”

His eyes twinkled. “A day? What does that mean exactly?”

“Well, let’s just say it wasn’t one of my best. A lot of things could have gone better.”

“Do you mind if I ask what happened?”

I bit down on my bottom lip. “Oh, you probably don’t want to hear about my problems. Maybe we should talk about something else.”

“Okay, if you want. But just so you know, I am interested . . .” He trailed off and glanced down with a slightly larger smile this time. “That almost sounded like a pickup line. I didn’t mean . . .” He flushed a light shade of pink. “Wow. I’m flustered. That’s a first. I’m normally pretty confident around women.” He said it more to himself than to me. He blinked a few times as if surprised with himself. “I’m interested in your problems. That’s what I meant to say.”

A smile forced its way on my lips. He was adorable when he was flustered. He exuded an enormous amount of confidence, so being flustered made him vulnerable. I liked it. Liked that I somehow had this kind of effect on him.

“Okay, if you really want to know,” I said, grinning even though I shouldn’t smile at what I was about to say. But I couldn’t help it. He was the most gorgeous man I’d ever seen, and he wanted to talk to me. “I was fired from my waitressing job. Business has been slow, and, apparently, I was the lowest one on the totem pole.”

His brows drew together. “That’s not good. What are you going to do?”

“Look for another job.”

“What type of work are you looking for? Maybe I can help.”

I shrugged. “At this point, I’ll take anything as long as it’s honorable work. I have bills I need to pay.”

He nodded, appearing to consider. “Do you know how to clean?”

I snickered. “Doesn’t everyone?”

“No, I wouldn’t say that.”

“Do you know how?” I asked.

“I have someone to do that for me. Or at least I did.”

“I see.”

He clasped his hands in front of him. “I’m leaving tomorrow to go to Kauai, and I have a chef and a driver but no one to clean my house. The lady who normally cleans for me quit just last week, and she left me in a bind.”

“Oh?”

He nodded. “So, I’d like to hire you to clean my house in Kauai.” He paused. “If that’s something you’re interested in doing.”

My eyes widened. “You’re offering me a job?”

“Yes. I pay well, but here’s the catch: you’d have to be willing to leave first thing tomorrow morning.”

“How long will you be in Kauai?”

“Indefinitely. I have business to attend to out there, and I don’t know how long it will take.”

“Wouldn’t it be less expensive to hire someone once you’re there?”

“Well, I was about to do that until you came along. But I’d rather have you.”

My face heated at the compliment. “That’s nice of you, considering I’m a stranger.”

He glanced away, looking almost troubled. “You keep saying I’m nice, but you should never take someone at face value. It’ll get you in a lot of trouble.”

“I should be suspicious then? Are you trying to tell me in a roundabout way that you’re not a nice guy?” I smiled, expecting him to contradict me.

“I won’t pretend to be nice, and, yes, you should always be suspicious.”

His statement threw me off guard and I almost laughed, but there was no humor in his eyes. In fact, his expression was completely serious. What kind of man would say that right off the bat? It seemed like he was warning me, but there was a flicker of something in his voice, possibly regret or sadness. Whatever it was, he wasn’t happy with who he was.

I felt this irresistible need to reach out to him, but I wasn’t sure how. “Oh, I don’t know. You’ve been friendly. I’m having a hard time picturing you as some mean ogre.”

“Must be something in those cookies. I had one earlier.” This time the humor flickered in his eyes as if it had been waiting for the right moment to come out.

The urge to tease him back was almost overwhelming. “What makes you think I’d want to work for you if you’re not an easy person to be around?”

He shrugged. “You need a job.”

Yeah, unfortunately, I did. The offer didn’t seem bad though. A trip to Kauai sounded like a dream, actually. The only problem was that I’d never been on a plane before, and I’d developed a small phobia against flying. Ann, my last foster mom, refused to get anywhere near an airport. She was able to quote dates and times of plane crashes, which celebrities had died that way—there were a lot believe it or not—and she was great at pulling up articles on the internet of all the worst things that happened to passengers while flying. She’d pretty much made it sound like a nightmare.

“I don’t know,” I said, twisting my hands in front of me. “I’m afraid of getting that high up in the air. If it’s tomorrow, I won’t have time to mentally prepare myself.”

“If you had time to think about it, you’d build it up in your head. Better to just get it over with.”

“That might be true, but I still don’t know.” I nibbled on my bottom lip, looking for another reason why this wouldn’t work. “Where would I live? I can’t afford to pay rent in two different places.”

“My house has staff quarters and meals are included.”

I jerked my head back. “Are you serious? Meals are included?”

He looked at me like I must be ignorant. “Yes, that’s standard.”

“But I can’t afford to buy a plane ticket.”

“You won’t have to. My father chartered a private plane.”

I nodded, considering his words. “You must have a lot of money.” I stopped myself. “Sorry, that sounded rude. Your finances aren’t any of my business.”

“Don’t apologize. It’s not a secret that the Armstrong family is wealthy.”

Just then, I glanced up and noticed Alexa heading straight for us.

Lucas followed my line of vision and winced. “Great. My ex-girlfriend. She won’t like that you’re talking to me.”

“Why? She seems really happy with Dylan. You don’t think she’s jealous, do you?”

“No. She’s definitely not jealous. She just doesn’t like me.”

Before I could respond, Alexa reached us, a concerned expression on her face. “Aria, you made it.”

“Yeah, I almost missed my bus, but I’m here.” I gave her a hug. Despite Lucas’s warning, I was glad to see Alexa. She’d been really kind to me, and I had no reason to think she had ill motives.

“If I’d known you had to take the bus, I would have offered to pick you up,” she said.

I waved her off. “No big deal. I’m used to taking public transportation.”

Alexa appeared reluctant as she turned to Lucas. “What are you doing here?” Her voice sounded cold enough to freeze an ocean.

“You know my father,” he said, “always thinking of his own image. He insisted I come. Said it would look like I held a grudge if I didn’t make an appearance.”

“I see,” she said.

I glanced between the two of them, watching their expressions. It was obvious there was a lot of bad blood between them, and I had no idea what he meant about “putting in an appearance.” 

Lucas wrote something down on the back of a business card and handed it to me. “Think about my offer. If you’re interested, give me a call.” He glanced at Alexa and then turned back to me. “As soon as I walk away, she’s going to try to convince you not to work for me. But if you’re smart, you’ll take the job. I pay well, and you won’t have to use public transportation anymore.”

He winked and then left without another word. My pulse picked up and butterflies swirled in my stomach. Should I take it? Of course, I should take it. I needed work and who’d turn down going to Kauai? But there was that one detail about having to fly there. It wasn’t as if I could take a train to an island.

I turned to Alexa. “He’s intense. Not sure why he offered me a job, but I really need it right now.”

“Aria, he’s not a good guy. I can’t emphasize that enough. Run. Get away as fast as you can. If you work for him, you’ll regret it.”

Nodding slowly, I realized she was speaking from the point of view of someone who’d had a bad break-up. She clearly didn’t trust him, but that didn’t mean I’d have a problem. And even if I did, what choice did I have? I was currently unemployed with no other leads. My bank account had two hundred dollars in it and that was it.

I’d come across some pretty shady characters over the years, and I wasn’t as naïve as I looked. During that short time when I was homeless, I’d learned to stand up for myself. Lucas was nothing compared to what I’d already been through. Plus, the man brought me cookies for goodness’ sake. He couldn’t be all that bad. “I’ve dealt with a lot of difficult people. He doesn’t scare me.”

“You should be scared,” she said. “Lucas Armstrong is not someone to mess with.”

I nodded slowly again. “Okay. Well, I’ll pray about it before doing anything.”

“Good.” She looked relieved. “Do you want to see the painting you’re in?”

“Yeah, I can’t wait. I’ve been looking forward to seeing it all day.”

“Great. They just brought it in from the other room.”

As she led me over, I read the back of the business card Lucas had given me. It said: If I don’t hear from you by ten o’clock tonight, I’ll assume you don’t want the job. Call me. He’d written down a cell number and next to it was a smiley face.

Something told me Lucas was a very complex man. On the one hand, he inferred he wasn’t a nice guy, and on the other, here he was scribbling smiley faces on the back of his card and offering me a job. I would pray about it, but it appeared that God had dropped this job opportunity into my lap, and I’d be a fool not to take it.

Still, I needed to think it over and make sure it was the best choice before I put myself on a plane.

Later that evening I laid in bed, praying and asking God to give me the wisdom to make the right decision. Afterward, I made a list of pros and cons. There were a lot of pros and only two cons: having to board a plane and dealing with a potentially difficult boss. Since I’d never been on a plane before, I figured it was time to take the plunge and get over whatever fear had been building in my mind because of Ann’s phobia. Maybe it wouldn’t be as horrible as I pictured, and I wanted to see life outside of Los Angeles. As far as dealing with a difficult boss, I wasn’t too worried. Lucas had already demonstrated his ability to be kind. How bad could he be? 

A small inner voice whispered that it might be horrible. What if Lucas lived up to his reputation? On a whim, I pulled out my phone and sent a text telling Lucas I’d take the job. I leaned back in bed and shook my head. I hope I hadn’t made a huge mistake.

Chapter 6

Aria

The next day Lucas sent a car to pick me up since I didn’t have a means of transportation besides the bus. He’d texted me saying he didn’t want to chance me not getting there in time, so the plan was for his driver to come to my home a little early, and then head back to his house to pick him up. He’d said his driver, Sam, and his chef, Leslie, would be the only other ones on the plane, not counting the flight staff and myself.

I decided to wait for the car on the sidewalk outside my apartment building. Unfortunately, I didn’t have a suitcase and everything happened so quickly there was no time to purchase one or even borrow someone else’s. Instead, I used a big black trash bag and put a week’s worth of clothing and a few toiletries inside. It was a little embarrassing, but what could I do? I also had my violin, tucked away in its case. There was no way I’d go anywhere without that.

I didn’t have to wait long because a black limousine pulled up to the curb, and a man with graying hair, appearing somewhere in his fifties opened the door and got out. My stomach fluttered, and I hoped his vehicle wouldn’t draw too much attention since my neighborhood wasn’t the best.

“Are you Miss Dasher?” he asked.

“Yes. Are you here to pick me up?”

He nodded. “Name’s Sam. Mr. Armstrong sent me.” He shook my hand. “Let me take your luggage for you.” He glanced around, and I lifted my trash bag off the ground, giving him a sheepish expression. “This is all I have besides my violin.”

He smiled wide, setting me at ease instantly. “I think I like you already.” He brought the bag and the violin case to the trunk and then opened the back door of the vehicle for me to get in.

He had a gentle and pleasant demeanor, reminding me of the character, Matthew, in the miniseries, Anne of Green Gables, but he was definitely a younger version.

Once we pulled away from the curb, I glanced at the back of Sam’s head. “Thanks for not laughing at me earlier. I’m kind of embarrassed I don’t have a suitcase.”

He looked at me in the rear-view mirror. “Nothing to be embarrassed about. Reminded me of myself before I married my wife.”

“Your wife must be sad she won’t be seeing you for a while. Lucas . . . I mean Mr. Armstrong . . . mentioned you’re coming to Kauai as well.”

“Yes, but my wife, Rebecca, passed away ten years ago, and my kids are all grown and living on their own. Rebecca died right before I began working for the Armstrong family. I was a driver for Lucas’s father in the beginning. Now I work for Lucas.”

“I’m sorry about your wife,” I said, sounding wistful as I looked out the window. “It’s hard to lose the ones we love.”

He cleared his throat and hesitated a few moments. “You sound as if you miss someone.”

I nodded slightly, still glancing out the window. “My Dad had a heart attack when I was seventeen. My younger brother . . . As far as I know, he’s alive. At least I hope. I just don’t know where he is.”

“I’m really sorry to hear that.” His voice was sincere and genuinely saddened. “What about your mom?”

“She died when I was a toddler. I don’t remember her.”

He appeared to consider my words. “You’re a brave girl. It can’t be easy trying to take care of yourself without the help of family to support you.”

“I don’t know if I’m brave. I had no other options but to survive or fall apart. With God’s help, I’ve persevered.”

“The Lord is faithful. He cares for our needs and provides when we least expect Him to.”

“That’s so true. Just yesterday, I lost my job and here I am today, on my way to Kauai to work for Mr. Armstrong. God provided before I even had to look for a job.”

He chuckled. “Things don’t happen that fast for most people, but I’m happy they did for you. The Lord’s blessings are new every morning. I remind myself of that each day when I get out of bed.” He glanced in the rear-view mirror and changed lanes. “I’m glad you’re coming along, Aria. Mr. Armstrong needs someone like you to work for him.”

“Why do you say that?”

He was quiet for a long time, and I started to wonder if he was going to answer. Just as I came to the conclusion that he wouldn’t, he cleared his throat. “He needs prayer. I worry about him. He has few friends that actually care about him, and he’s not close with his family. Throughout the years, I’ve tried to reach out, but he’s never confided in me. I’m just an old guy, you know? But someone young like you, he might be willing . . .” He trailed off.

“Are you saying I should befriend him?”

“That’s entirely your choice.”

“What’s he like as a boss?”

We were in a nicer part of the city now, and Sam turned down a street with luxury buildings. “This is your first day on the job. Do you want the truth or a version of the truth?”

I laughed. “I want the whole truth, of course.”

“Mr. Armstrong has the reputation of being cold and ruthless, but I’ve found him to be fair.”

“So, you think the reputation is false then?”

“I didn’t say that. But he’s always treated me well.”

We came to a red light, and he glanced at me over his shoulder. “I’ve learned all his idiosyncrasies by now. I know when to stay out of his way and when to speak up.”

I scrunched up my face. “I can’t figure out if he’s good or bad.”

“I’ve lived long enough to know people are complex,” he said. “And there are often multiple sides to a personality. Lucas is a troubled man—there are things he won’t talk about. Then again, if I had a father like his, I’d be troubled too.” He pulled into a parking garage and our conversation was cut short. “We’re here. I’ll go up and assist Mr. Armstrong. You can stay in the car. We won’t be long.”

About ten minutes later, Lucas came down with his luggage.

He grinned at me as he walked up to the vehicle. “Glad you made it, Aria. Sam told me you needed a suitcase, so I brought an extra one for you.”

The corners of my lips lifted up. He was going to let me use one of his suitcases? “You don’t have to do that. I feel bad.”

“It’s nothing. I’ll give you a few minutes to transfer your belongings while I make a call.”

About ten minutes later, we were on the road, headed towards the airport. At one point, I felt his eyes on me, and when I looked over, he just smiled. He didn’t say anything or try to make conversation. It happened a few more times, and in each instance, he’d give me this look like he was trying to figure me out. As if I puzzled him in some way.

Lucas’s chef, Leslie, met us at the airport and when it was time, we all boarded the plane. Lucas sat up front and drew a curtain, effectively separating himself from the rest of us. I was a little disappointed he wouldn’t be sitting with us, but it was a good reminder that I was his employee and a strict line had to be drawn.

I followed Sam and Leslie to the back. A flight attendant showed us to our seats, gave safety instructions, and offered us a beverage. I’d heard plenty of stories of celebrities crashing in their own personal jets, so I was thankful the plane was quite large.

My heart began to pound in my chest as I thought about what was about to happen. Until this point, I’d been distracted with thoughts about what it would be like to work for Lucas, but now that I was on the plane, my apprehension turned elsewhere. Everything Ann had said about flying kept flipping through my head, despite the fact that I was trying really hard not to think about it.

I remembered her telling me about a plane that crashed in the ocean, and when they dispatched divers to assess the damage, the passengers were still sitting in their seats. The image of their clothing swaying back and forth in the water sent goosebumps all over my arms. I didn’t want to drown . . . that would be a horrible way to go. But then I recalled her saying people usually perished from the plane catching on fire. That was even worse.

As a Christian, I understood that I shouldn’t worry about those things. I knew where I was going when I died, and I also knew God would be there with me when it happened, showering His grace upon me as I went through it. Still, this was a completely new experience for me, and I wasn’t entirely ready.

Everything developed so quickly, and even though I believed I was making the right decision by taking this job with Lucas, I still worried about leaving my brother behind. What if I missed an important lead because I was off in Kauai? What if he tried to find me, and I was unavailable? What if I was essentially abandoning him? All the reasons I shouldn’t be on this plane ran through my head in a matter of seconds.

Plus, there was another issue. After talking with Lucas the previous evening, I’d developed a little crush on him. Maybe it didn’t seem like a big deal, but I had to stay focused. I couldn’t allow myself to get sidetracked. Lucas didn’t appear to be the kind of man I could have a relationship with since I wanted to be with a man who loved the Lord. From what I’d heard from Alexa, Lucas didn’t fit that description.

Not to mention, he was now my boss, and I’d already dealt with a difficult boss at Mama’s café. What if I’d just traded one bad boss for another? I couldn’t stop second-guessing my decisions, and one worry after the next escalated until I felt like I was losing my mind. It was like a row of dominoes. Once the first fell, the entire row followed. 

The pilot spoke a few words over a loudspeaker and everyone put their seat belts on. I was sitting in an aisle seat next to Leslie, her copper-colored hair falling just below her ears. She appeared to be somewhere in her late forties, possibly early fifties. Sam sat on the other side of her, appearing calm and relaxed like flying was no big deal to him. Gritting my teeth, I closed my eyes and braced for take-off.

Leslie chuckled. “Get a grip on yourself, honey. Just relax. You’re being childish. The way you’re acting right now is downright funny.” She had a raspy voice, like someone who’d smoked cigarettes for a long time.

She barely knew me, so I wasn’t sure why she’d spoken as if she did. A lot of adults were afraid of flying, so childish wasn’t the word I would have used.

“It’s not funny,” I said. “And I’m not laughing.” If I was being childish, I couldn’t help it. I was doing my best to cope.

“If you saw your face right now, you’d have a good laugh.” She sat up taller. “I’m not afraid of anything. That’s just the type of person I am. Some people live in fear their entire lives but not me. I guess I’m just a strong woman. Not everyone can be like that.”

Before we’d boarded the plane, I’d shared my fear of flying, but, now, I regretted sharing something so personal. We all had weaknesses. Flying just happened to be one of mine.

I felt completely out of control as the plane taxied forward. My pulse picked up and my breath came in short spurts. I couldn’t inhale fully, and it seemed like the oxygen going to my head was slowly dissipating. The plane sped up and there was a bit of pressure as it lifted off the ground and flew at an incline. I clenched the armrest, and every muscle in my body tensed. I kept my eyes closed and wouldn’t open them until we leveled off.

There was some turbulence, but it didn’t last long. It should have made me feel better to know the takeoff part was over but it didn’t. At least I had a seat next to the aisle, but I still felt an uncontrollable urge to move to a spot where there was more space. A panicky sensation stirred in my chest now that we were up in the air. How far up were we? Everything began to feel as if it was closing in on me, and my body broke out in a sweat.

“Are you okay?” Sam asked, looking at me with a concerned expression.

I couldn’t speak, so I just nodded, hoping that was enough. My hands fell to my knees, and I tightened my grip on them, trying to pull myself together, trying to breathe in and out, in and out. But the more I tried, the worse it got. My head felt dizzy, and my heart wouldn’t stop racing. Taking note of my body’s reactions only escalated the problem even more.

Leslie laughed. “Time to grow up, little girl. Don’t you know that more people die in car accidents than in planes?”

She had this rough way of speaking, and I sensed she wasn’t trying to be mean, but I was in no state to deal with it today.

She laughed again, and the sound was grating. “If anything, claustrophobia is a bigger issue than the actual flying part. Being in such a small space for hours on end without being able to get out—”

“Leslie, that’s not helping,” Sam said.

I wanted to hug him for that, but it would have to wait.

“Just take a deep breath, Aria,” he said.

I nodded quickly. “I’m trying.”

There was a sudden burst of turbulence and the plane dropped and then steadied itself. My heart was in my stomach and my breath came out fast, almost like I was hyperventilating, but, I wasn’t at that point quite yet.

Leslie covered my hand with her own. “My goodness, your hand is so cold.” She smiled. “Look, honey, it’s simple. Just think about your family and how they’re waiting for you at home. That’s what I do when I’m upset.”

“Leslie,” Sam said with an edge to his voice, but she ignored him.

“I think about the people who love me, and how I’m not alone in this world.”

“Leslie,” Sam said more urgently, tapping her on the shoulder.

She glared at him. “Stop it. I’m trying to comfort Aria right now.”

He opened his mouth to say something, and she put a finger over his lips to shush him. She was a little too pushy for my taste even though I was sure she meant well.

She turned back to me. “In fact, I bet your people are praying for you and thinking good thoughts at this very moment.”

“Okay, I’ll try to remember that,” I said, hoping that would be the end of it and she’d stop talking. An ache settled deep in my chest. I wasn’t overly sensitive, and I didn’t usually have a problem talking about my family, but the stress of this situation made every nerve ending in my body more aware.

“I’m sure your mom wouldn’t want you to behave this way,” she continued.

I’d never known my mom, but that didn’t mean I never thought about her. Dad had shown me pictures, and I looked a lot like her. Not having a mother growing up had been hard. Dad tried to compensate, and he’d done a good job most of the time, but no one could ever replace a mother.

“I’m sure she taught you to face your fears,” Leslie said, nudging me with her elbow. She wanted a response from me, but I wouldn’t look at her, just kept my eyes in front of me. Please stop talking about my mom.

Leslie leaned closer, crowding me, and the tiny space felt even smaller. “Toughen up. The world is a difficult place. Flying on a plane is the least of your worries.”

I held back what I wanted to say and tried to keep my temper in check. If she only knew what I’d been through, she wouldn’t have said that. She was a well-meaning lady with an out-of-control tongue. I closed my eyes and told myself that over and over.

“Leslie, can I have a word with you?” Sam asked. “How about if we take a walk?”

She looked at him like he was crazy. “We can’t just—”

“The seat belt light is off,” he said.

“That’s not what I was going to say. We can’t just leave Aria. She needs us right now.”

Poor Sam. He was trying, but Leslie wasn’t getting it. Every word she said was like a crack in a glass window. A few more cracks and the whole thing would break.

“It’s okay,” I said. “Go with Sam.” Please.

She shook her head. “Nope. Not going to do it.”

Normally, I had no problem telling people to back off, but in this situation, I felt like I was barely coping. It was taking all my energy just to sit still and not have a full-blown panic attack. Dealing with Leslie was something I couldn’t handle right now.

She leaned in and her lips were too close to my ear. “Listen sugar, I think I know what this about. You’re homesick. A big hotshot hired you to clean his house in a part of the world you’ve never seen, and you’re probably wondering if it was the right decision. Well, let me tell you, it is the right decision. Mom and Dad have to let their little girl grow up. I had a hard time letting go of my son, but once I did, he was able to spread his wings and fly.”

Her words left a bitter taste in my mouth. After Dad died, I’d had to grow up too fast. Moving from foster home to foster home, and losing my brother, the only family I had left, was the one of the hardest things I’d ever had to deal with. I didn’t need a speech about spreading my wings. I didn’t need to hear that my mom and dad had to learn to let go—they already had.

The weight of my anxieties, and, now, the grief over losing my family felt almost unbearable. Many times over the years, I’d felt alone, but sitting here with Leslie, hearing her talk about family like it was something everyone had—it shattered me.

My father and my brother were always in my thoughts, but they were both gone. They weren’t available to me—no one was. Tears streamed down my cheeks, and I couldn’t contain myself any longer. A sob broke loose and my breathing shuddered as I tried to hold it in. I put my hands over my face and leaned down towards my legs, hoping the world would disappear around me.

“All right. That’s enough,” Sam said.

I heard his seat belt unclasp, and then he was standing next to me, a hand on my shoulder. “Aria, come with me, honey.” He spoke softly, and when I glanced up, his eyes were full of empathy.

I didn’t ask questions, I just got up and followed him. At that point, I would have done anything to get away. He led me to the front of the plane where the curtain separated Lucas from the rest of us.

“Wait here,” he said.

Nodding, I wiped my face with my hands. I had no idea what was happening. Maybe I was in trouble. Maybe he was telling Lucas I was a problem, but I sensed Sam wouldn’t do that to me.

He stepped out a few seconds later. “I informed Mr. Armstrong of the situation, and he’s more than happy to let you sit with him.”

My eyes widened. “Oh, I couldn’t do that. He obviously wants to be alone. That’s why he’s behind the curtain.”

The curtain drew back and Lucas stood in front of me, eyes blazing as he took in my tears. “If I had known you were back there crying . . .” He shook his head and mumbled something I couldn’t make out. “Come with me.”

Sam patted me on the shoulder and left, and Lucas took me by the arm and brought me to a seat that looked like a recliner. It was attached to another recliner, so when we both sat down, we were only inches apart.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.

“No.”

He nodded slowly. “Then you don’t have to.” He appeared to debate within himself, and then he made eye contact with me. “Come here. Lay your head on my shoulder. Try to get some sleep.”

He lifted up the arm rest that separated us, and I didn’t think twice about it—I scooted closer. Maybe I should have considered the consequences, but I was so overcome with heartache and anxiety that I took his comfort without a second thought. I settled my head on his firm shoulder, and the warmth of his body soothed my troubled mind. His other arm came around me, and he pulled me tightly to himself. For the first time since I’d gotten on the plane, I felt safe.

He didn’t say anything else and neither did I. It didn’t take long for me to fall asleep, wrapped in the cocoon of his arms.

Chapter 7

Lucas

Normally, I tried to fall asleep whenever I flew anywhere but, today, that was impossible. I was so wound up I couldn’t relax.

And that was Aria’s fault.

The moment I saw her quirky smile this morning as she waited for me in the car, my entire mood lifted. It was like someone slipped something into my coffee, and I couldn’t stop smiling. But then I remembered the purpose of this trip and everything soured. I wasn’t flying to Kauai to get to know Aria. I was flying to Kauai to court Hillary. To convince her to marry me.

That was when I knew I had to draw a line in the sand and keep my distance from the woman with the long black hair. The woman who’d kept me up late last night, wondering if she’d accept my job offer.

When she’d texted at exactly ten to tell me she wanted the job, a shot of adrenaline had coursed through me and maybe some fear as well. I wanted her to take the job, but I also wanted her to decline. That would have been the easier route. I wasn’t too proud to admit I was drawn to her a little. But that was where it needed to end. There was no point in spending time with her if it was going to distract me from my goal.

But when Sam interrupted my rest to inform me that Aria was having anxiety over flying, and Leslie was making it worse, I knew I had to do something. That Leslie spoke out of turn didn’t surprise me. She spoke her mind too freely sometimes. I’d had some issues with her before, and I’d nearly let her go a few times, but I used to hate it when my father fired people left and right. I didn’t want to be like him. He had no loyalty to his staff whatsoever. No loyalty to anyone period. I didn’t want to be like that.

I glanced down at Aria asleep in my arms, her light breathing right next to my ear, the scent of her floral shampoo filling my nostrils. It was impossible to concentrate on anything but her. Maybe it wasn’t her fault. Maybe it wasn’t mine either.

But this was the hopeless situation I found myself in.

And I couldn’t stop looking at her, the way the light caught on her face, the way she was tucked into my side like she belonged there.

She didn’t belong there.

And I knew it.

But I wasn’t letting go . . . not yet.

When the plane landed, I would distance myself from her so I could start focusing on Hillary. I was good at keeping people at arm’s length—it was a skill I’d mastered well. Aria would take the hint. But right now, I didn’t want this to end, whatever it was.

She stirred and opened her eyes, appearing almost startled. I didn’t loosen my arm right away. That would have been the gentlemanly thing to do, but no one had called me a gentleman in a while. Maybe it felt too good holding her like this. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d had my arm around a woman. I wasn’t one for showing affection. But I had to admit, it was kind of . . . nice.

She didn’t try to move away either, and for a moment, we just stared at each other as if we were trying to figure out what to do next. Her eyelashes fluttered and the corners of her mouth tipped up like she was attempting to smile.

“Hi,” she said.

“Hi.”

My eyes trailed the smooth contours of her face, the creamy skin that looked soft, touchable. I found myself wanting to run a couple of fingers down the side of her cheek to find out if I was right. But that would have been going too far, so I removed my arm from around her and scooted away, creating some distance. “Looks like you got a little sleep. Feeling any better?”

She nodded. “Yeah, I do actually. How long did I sleep?”

“About thirty minutes.”

“That’s it?” She looked disappointed. “I was hoping I’d slept through most of the flight, and we were almost there.”

I chuckled. “Nope. We still have hours to go. Wish I had a time machine and could whip us past this but—”

“I have to suffer through it. I know.”

“It hasn’t been too bad so far, has it?”

“Uh . . . it was pretty bad back there. I thought I might have a breakdown. I’m not sure why, but I feel safe with you.” She smiled as if it was the most normal thing in the world to say.

I stilled, the muscles in my back tensing up. No one had ever said those words to me before. I feel safe with you. Alarm bells went off in my head.

She shouldn’t feel safe with me.

I wasn’t safe.

Not that I would ever hurt her . . . physically. I would never do that. But I had a way of hurting people emotionally. It was just who I was. I was that kind of man, my father’s son. He’d trained me to be callous, even brutal at times.

I lifted an eyebrow. “How do you know I’m not a wolf about to gobble you up? Maybe you shouldn’t jump to conclusions so quickly.”

“Are you a wolf?” she asked.

“If I was, do you think I’d tell you?”

She smiled like this was a joke. “Probably not.”

But it wasn’t a joke. I was dead serious. “You should be more careful. Just because I invited you in here with me doesn’t mean you should let down your guard.”

“I think it’s too late for that. I already fell asleep on your shoulder.”

“Maybe I’m waiting for the right moment to strike.”

“You should rethink that unless you want to end up doubled-over, lying in a ball on the ground with the worst pain you’ve ever had.”

She said all of that in one breath and then shot me a goofy smile. It was so playful and lighthearted, I burst out laughing.

“That’s . . . an interesting image you just gave me. I didn’t know you were such a tough girl.”

“Oh, I learned how to take care of myself. Believe me.”

“Self-defense classes?”

She shook her head. “I never took a class, but there was a guy on the street who taught me a few things.”

“A guy on the street . . .” I emphasized each word like it was a riddle. “So, you just happened to run into some guy?”

She continued to smile, but her body tensed the slightest bit. “Yeah, he was willing to help me out.”

I stared at her for a long moment trying to figure out what she was talking about. “How did you convince some random man to teach you self-defense moves?”

“We were both living on the street at the time,” she said carefully, watching for my response. “Thankfully, he was one of the good guys, and he thought I should know how to defend myself.” She glanced away, running a hand over her hair self-consciously.

“Living on the street. What does that mean exactly?” I wasn’t dense. I just wanted to make sure I’d heard her right.

“It means I was homeless.”

My jaw tightened. The idea of her homeless . . . My fists clenched. That shouldn’t have happened. I brought my gaze back to her and saw the hurt in her eyes. She thought I was judging her, but I wasn’t. I wished I’d known her back then, so I could’ve helped her.

My chest squeezed as I pictured her alone, running into all kinds of strange characters. For some reason, thinking about it made me angry. Made me want to break something. She shouldn’t have put herself in a position like that. Terrible things could have happened.

“Why were you living on the street?” There was an edge to my voice, and I knew I shouldn’t jump to conclusions, but a protective feeling rose up in me and I felt like I had to make her understand . . . She needed to take better care of herself.

She shifted in the recliner and crossed her arms. “Because I quit my job and couldn’t find another one. I couldn’t pay my rent, so I got evicted.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t have quit your job.” The words hung in the air between us. When she didn’t say more, I added, “I hope you learned your lesson. That wasn’t a smart move.”

Her mouth dropped open, and for a few seconds, she appeared stunned. Fire sparked in her eyes, and I had a feeling I was in for it. I was about to see the real Aria.

“Yeah, maybe I should have stuck it out with my pervert boss who thought he could ask for special favors,” she said using air quotes. “That’s exactly what I should have done.”

The words slapped me across the face. I hadn’t anticipated that.

She glared at me. “Or I could have taken him up on his offer to live with him. That would have been a great idea.”

I tilted my head back and stared up at the ceiling, wishing I could take my words back. “I’m sorry.”

“I was homeless Lucas. Homeless. Yes, I’m sure it’s a word you’re unfamiliar with, but I didn’t cause it. He threatened me, and it just happened. I was faced with a choice: become someone I didn’t want to be or take my chances on the streets until I found another job. I had no one to help me, so I chose to take my chances.”

“Did he hurt you?” My voice was quiet, almost lethal. If he touched her . . . If he hurt her, I would track him down until I found him, and I would . . . I stopped myself. Why did I care this much? I needed to pull back a little. Get a handle on things. Aria was my employee, nothing more.

But when she didn’t respond right away, I had to know. I couldn’t rest until she assured me nothing bad had happened. And if it had . . . If it had, I would make that man regret the day he ever met her. “Aria, answer me. Did he hurt you?”

Her eyes widened. “No.”

“Did anyone else hurt you?”

“No.”

I blew out a breath and turned away, gritting my teeth. “Good thing. It’s a good thing no one hurt you because I would’ve . . .”

“You would’ve what?”

“Never mind. It doesn’t matter.”

She cocked her head to the side. “You’re really worked up over this.”

“No, I’m not.” I crossed my arms and averted my eyes. Yeah, I was a little keyed up, but I wasn’t worked up. Maybe they were close in meaning but whatever.

“You actually care about me, don’t you?”

I didn’t respond. Honestly, I didn’t have an answer to that.

“You tried to tell me you’re not a nice guy, but everything you’ve done for me so far has been kind. I think you’re wrong, Lucas. You are a nice guy.”

Warning bells went off in my head again. I hadn’t controlled myself, and she was getting false ideas about me.

I looked her directly in the eye. “Do not mistake attraction for kindness.”

Her eyebrows flew up. “Are you saying you’re attracted to me?”

“I’m attracted to women in general.”

“So, you’re sweet to every woman you encounter?”

“Sweet?” I laughed bitterly. “No, Aria. I’m never sweet. I keep trying to tell you. I’ve been giving you hints this entire time, but you’re not taking them. Don’t get the wrong idea about me.”

“It’s not like I think you’re Mr. Rogers. More like Mr. T. He’s a tough guy, but underneath he’s a big teddy bear.”

I shook my head slowly, attempting not to smile, but she looked so cute smiling at me, it was hard to push her away. This was escalating beyond my control. Time to take a breather. I stood and stretched my arms. “Aria, let’s get one thing straight. I’m not Mr. Nice guy. I’m the kind of man you should be very careful around.”

Chapter 8

Aria

Lucas Armstrong was the most intense man I’d ever met.

I couldn’t stop thinking about our conversation earlier, and why he seemed intent on warning me that he was not a nice guy. But when I’d mentioned I was homeless at one time in my life, he got really worked up over it.

No one had ever gotten that upset about something that concerned me.

No one.

Except for my dad and brother back in the day.

It made me wonder if there was a softer side to him, a side he kept hidden from everyone else. The side I saw at the museum when he’d handed me the cookies and then later told me he was interested in my problems. The side I saw today when he offered his shoulder and placed his arm around me to calm my nerves.

It wasn’t a put-on. He wasn’t acting. I saw it in his eyes—he truly cared. If that was true, then what made him vehemently deny that side of himself? And what would I do when the cold, unfriendly Lucas showed up?

Sam said he was troubled, and it had something to do with his dad. He was a mystery, but I needed to be careful. Getting too close to him would backfire in more ways than one. When he’d hinted he was attracted to me, my pulse skyrocketed, and a rush of endorphins had washed through me, filling me with a giddiness that still hadn’t gone away. It was a high I couldn’t afford to have and a reminder that I had to guard my heart better.

He was not someone I could ever be with, and I couldn’t let myself think of him in any other way except as the man who hired me to clean his house. I was serious about wanting a relationship with a man who loved God. The Bible commanded believers not to be bound to an unbeliever, and that included marriage. That was where my heart was, and even though I was attracted to Lucas, I couldn’t let that attraction steer me in the wrong direction.

The plane had touched down about fifteen minutes ago, and we were now in a black Mercedes SUV, on our way to Lucas’s house in the mountains. Leslie and I sat next to each other, and she was a lot quieter this time around. I got the feeling she was offended I’d changed seats on the plane because she kept looking at me like I’d betrayed her or something.

I glanced out the window as we passed by the ocean and headed inland. For some reason, I assumed the home would be by the beach, but Lucas informed us that he preferred the mountain view and the solitude it provided.

We drove for quite a while until we came to a dirt road and hitched a left. In the distance, I spotted an enormous house overlooking a cliff. Everywhere I looked there was greenery. Green grass. Tropical green trees, swaying in the warm breeze. Green mountains so high I had to stretch my neck to get a good look. They were huge—like giant monsters reaching for the sky, majestic and grand.

I was used to a duller green, having been born and raised in Southern California where the climate was hot and dry and it scarcely rained. The bright, exotic green of Kauai was a whole new experience for me.

Sam drove up a long driveway and parked outside the home. We all slid out of the vehicle and the warm air encased me, moist and balmy. A cool, refreshing breeze blew through my hair.

The house was one story, but the length seemed to go on and on, commanding views from every vantage point. It looked more like a resort than a home, and never in my life had I imagined staying in a place like this. The exterior was a combination of various shades of warm brown woodwork that appeared like it had been stained and polished to perfection. Tiki torches and tropical plants lined the pathway to the entrance. Exotic flowers in colors of white and fuchsia and lavender beckoned for me to touch them, but I resisted though the perfumed scent was nothing short of heavenly.

Lucas unlocked the double doors, and we followed him inside. My mouth dropped open as I took in the expansive ceilings, stone floors, and spacious rooms with modern furniture that actually looked comfortable. We walked to the back of the house and Sam opened up a large floor-to-ceiling window that spread the length of an entire wall, creating an indoor-outdoor experience. The backyard had gardens and a gazebo, and beyond that, an infinity pool went all the way to the edge of the cliff, making it appear as if you could swim right off the end. The view was dramatic with a light green valley below and tall, sculpted mountains surrounding us from all sides. Tears sprung to my eyes because I’d never seen anything so beautiful in my entire life.

Lucas glanced at me and Leslie. “Sam will take you on a tour and then show you to your rooms. Leslie, once you’ve settled in, I’ll have Sam drive you to the closest grocery store so you can stock up.”

She nodded. “Sounds good, Mr. Armstrong. I’ll get right on it.”

Sam showed us the rest of the house, and it was equally impressive. I especially liked the sunroom with recliners facing the view over the cliff. The window in that room slid to the side as well, giving it an open appearance, as if you were steps away from your own personal garden. Sam informed us that the master bedroom was to the left, and our rooms were to the right.

We walked down the hall and Sam pointed to a spacious room. “This one’s for you, Aria, and Leslie you can take the room next door.”

My new bedroom was huge, with wood paneling and a ceiling fan. A couch and coffee table sat on one side of the room with a desk and computer nearby. A king-sized bed sat on the other side, and a sliding glass door opened up to a view of the mountains. There was even a small porch outside with garden furniture and a hammock. Glancing out, I didn’t see a single building in the distance. We were truly on our own out here.

I unpacked, and that took all of about five minutes because I didn’t have much. Leslie knocked on my door and announced that she and Sam were leaving. I wondered if Lucas wanted me to start cleaning immediately, but when I walked through the home, he wasn’t anywhere to be seen.

The outdoors beckoned to me, and though I knew I should probably hunt down the cleaning supplies, I grabbed my phone to take a few pictures and meandered outside instead. I hadn’t experienced anything like this before, so it was hard to deny myself a few more minutes of being outside. The warm air smelled fresh and clean. A light rain drizzled down, but I didn’t care. I wandered to the gazebo and sat in one of the chairs, staring at the surrounding beauty.

I had only been there a few minutes when Lucas walked over to join me. He sat in a chair across from me and rested his hands on the table. “All of this is something else, isn’t it?”

I nodded. “Now I understand why you chose the mountains. The beach is amazing, but this . . . this is a dream. I feel like I’m in Jurassic Park and any minute a dinosaur will come running through the premises.”

He smiled just slightly. “I’m glad you like it.”

“It seems like I should be paying you, not the other way around.”

He chuckled but didn’t say anything, glancing down at the table.

My phone dinged, and I checked my texts. It was from Mason. Can’t wait to see you this evening for our special date.

I gasped. “Oh, no!”

“What’s wrong?” Lucas asked.

“I was supposed to have a date tonight, and I completely forgot. I feel terrible.”

My fingers typed a quick response to Mason. I’m so sorry, but I can’t go on our date. So much has happened, you’re not going to believe it. I got a job and I’m in Kauai! We’ll have to reschedule when I get back.

Lucas’s expression darkened, and he studied me with intense eyes. “Do I know this man?”

“No. I mean, of course, you wouldn’t know him. You don’t know any of my friends.”

“Is he your boyfriend?” he asked.

“No. He’s a good friend.”

“Friends don’t go on dates together.”

“Well, he likes me more than that, and I figured I should give him a shot.”

“But you aren’t interested . . .”

“I never said that.”

“It’s all over your face.”

“I can’t see him right now, anyway.” My phone dinged again, but I ignored it. I would answer when I had more privacy.

His shoulders tensed, and he leaned his elbows on the table. By the way he slumped forward, it seemed like the weight of the world pressed down on him. He glanced at me quickly and his jaw tightened. “There’s something I should tell you.”

The sadness in his voice caught my attention, and I sat up a little straighter.

“Maybe this doesn’t need to be said. I wasn’t planning on bringing it up, but now that we’re here . . .” He looked away.

I studied him, the firm outline of his jaw, the mess of hair blowing in the wind. I wanted to run my fingers through it and make it behave. Of course, the fact that it didn’t made him seem all the more handsome. He didn’t say anything more, and I was about to ask what he’d meant when he finally settled his gaze on me again.

“I like you, Aria.”

My eyes widened, and I grew still, almost afraid to move, my heart beating an unsteady rhythm. I hadn’t expected him to say that, and it was a little unnerving, truth be told.  “You do?”

He nodded. “It’s messing with my head right now—not that it’s your fault. It’s not.”

“How is it messing with your head?”

His brow pulled. “There’s this thing I need to do, but every time I look at you, I don’t want to do it.”

“Okay . . .”

He pressed his lips together as if wanting to hold back, but then he sighed as if resigned. “I’m here to win over a woman named Hillary Fineman. I have to convince her to marry me.”

I almost gasped. Almost. Somehow, I caught myself before I made a fool of myself. Even though I knew he and I were not a possibility, it still hit me straight in the gut. I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out.

“My father’s health is failing. He’s made it clear that I have to be married in order to inherit his fortune. If I want a piece of his wealth, I have to go along with this plan. He has a list of preapproved women, and Hillary is number two on that list.”

Before I thought about it, I asked, “Who is number one?”

“Alexa. I already asked her to marry me and she refused. It’s the reason there’s so much tension between the two of us. But that’s another story.” He glanced away, looking pained.

I shouldn’t ask. I knew I shouldn’t ask, but I couldn’t stop myself. “Did you love Alexa?”

He shook his head. “There was never any love between us, on her end or mine.”

“And Hillary . . . How do you feel about her?”

He wouldn’t look at me. “I feel nothing. This is strictly business.”

I frowned. “You’re going to try to win over a woman you feel nothing for?”

“It’s what I have to do.”

“How is that fair to her?”

“I’ll be upfront with her about my intentions. My father wants me to pretend, but I can’t do that.”

“Why are you telling me this? I’m just the woman who’s going to clean your house.”

He let out a bitter laugh. “I asked myself the same thing. It’s no one’s business but my own.” He leaned back and settled one arm on top of the chair next to him. “Thing is, it’s bothering me, and I feel like I need to explain.”

I stared at him, confused. “You’re not making sense, Lucas. Why do you need to explain this to me?”

“Because I can’t let you affect me like this. It’s getting in the way.”

Oh, no. He was going to fire me. This couldn’t be happening. We’d barely just arrived. “Please, I really need this job.”

“I’m not getting rid of you if that’s what you think.”

“Oh.” Relief and confusion swept through me. If he wasn’t planning on firing me, why was he telling me this?

“I plan to keep my distance. If it feels like I’m ignoring you, it’s not because I’m upset with you. It’s just something I need to do right now. I can’t pursue Hillary if I’m distracted.”

I jerked my head back. He was distracted by me? Butterflies swirled in my stomach at his confession, infusing nervous excitement throughout my body in a way I’d never felt before. The thought that this man liked me that much was hard to believe. If I hadn’t just heard him say it, I would have dismissed it entirely.

My heart pounded restlessly in my chest. “I’m surprised you shared that with me. You don’t seem like the type to open up.”

“I’m not,” he said, voice gruff. “But I didn’t want you thinking you did something wrong. I want you to enjoy this place without worrying.”

A warm sensation flooded over me. “That’s kind of you.”

“I’m not kind.”

“Your actions say otherwise.”

“That’s enough,” he said, standing. “I’m not what you think. I’ve done terrible things, Aria. Things you would despise. Whatever notion you have in that head of yours, let it go.” He strode a few paces towards the house but stopped and glanced at me over his shoulder. “From now on, you’re going to see the real me, and don’t get upset if you don’t like it. I gave you fair warning.” He paused. “Just remember, it has nothing to do with you.”

And then he was gone, and I was left wondering what that was about. He liked me . . . was even distracted by me . . .

He planned on ignoring me and didn’t want me to feel bad about it. Okay, that was nice of him to care about my feelings, but now that I understood it was because I affected him . . . that definitely did not help. It was easier thinking he wasn’t interested.

I had to put his words out of my head.

He was about to pursue another woman, and he was the last man I could ever be with. Whatever he’d just admitted to, I needed to tuck it away somewhere . . . Somewhere I wouldn’t look or see or even think about.

I checked Mason’s latest text. Kauai? What happened??? For the next few minutes, I sent him a long explanation, leaving out Lucas’s most recent declaration.

Mason: You didn’t need to go all the way to Kauai. I would have helped you out.

Me: I know you would have, but I didn’t want to take advantage.

Mason: I want you to take advantage . . . haha.

I really didn’t know how to answer that. One way led to hurting his feelings, and the other led to encouraging something I wasn’t sure I wanted.

Me: Anyway, I don’t know how long this job will last. It’s temporary, but Mr. Armstrong hasn’t given me an exact time frame. Thanks for understanding and for being such a good friend.

Mason: I could be much more if you’d let me.

Me: That’s a subject we’ll have to return to at a later date. Right now, I need to concentrate on saving enough money to pay my bills.

Mason: I’ll wait for you, but I’ll only wait so long. There’s someone at church who expressed interest in me, but I told her my heart belongs to you.

Ugh. This conversation made me so uncomfortable.

Me: Don’t wait for me. If you think there’s a chance with someone else, you should take it.

He didn’t respond for at least five minutes and I began to despair that I’d really hurt him this time. I cared about him and didn’t want to be the source of pain in his life.

Mason: We’ll talk about it when you get back. I won’t make any decisions until then.

Me: If you like this woman, and she likes you, then you should go for it.

Mason: She’s a friend and that’s it.

Me: Mason, that’s what our relationship is . . . friendship.

Mason: I know, you don’t need to remind me.

Why did friendships with guys have to be so painful? I felt like I was walking on eggshells and no matter what I said or didn’t say, I would hurt him in some way. I had to be careful not to mislead him, but I also wanted to give him a chance. If only my feelings would catch up to my brain.

I put my phone away and headed inside. It was time to get to work and put relationships and men out of my head. I had to keep my eyes on my goal: save up enough money to hire an investigator.

That was the only thing I would allow myself to focus on.

Chapter 9

Lucas, 12 years old

The nurse sat down on a rolling stool, and she typed away at a mobile computer. “Lucas, you’re here for a follow-up for your broken arm, correct?”

I nodded, glancing at my cast.

“That’s right,” Dad said, looking stiff and uncomfortable in his dark blue suit. He ran a hand over his bald head. He was older when he’d had me, so he didn’t look as young as a lot of my friends’ dads.

“How did it happen?” the nurse asked.

“He was playing baseball during his sixth grade P.E. class,” Dad said. “He decided to slide into home plate. Boys will be boys. Isn’t that right, Lucas?”

I nodded again but didn’t say anything.

“He has a small cold as well,” Dad said, “but that’s nothing to be concerned about.”

The nurse typed something else and asked a few other questions. When she was done, she got up to leave. “Doctor Wilson will be with you in a few minutes.”

“Thank you,” Dad said, and then he went back to scrolling through his email on his phone. He always did that . . . constantly. Whenever we were anywhere, all he did was check his email and text messages.

I couldn’t believe he was here with me today. He hardly ever came to my medical appointments. That was left up to Stella, my nanny. But today, he insisted he should be the one to come along.

He glanced at me. “Once this is over, I’ll take you for ice cream. How does that sound?”

I frowned. Why was he being nice all of a sudden? He never offered to take me for ice cream. “Um . . . good?”

He smiled. “And when we get home, I have a special present for you.”

“You do?”

Dad gave me and my sister, Calista, anything we wanted, but it didn’t usually come with wrapping paper unless it was Christmas. Even then, we already knew what all the presents would be because we chose them ahead of time. There were never any surprises, and Dad never had a special gift for me or something he picked out himself.

He put his phone down and stared at me with a serious face. “Yes, the present is at home. Just make sure you handle the doctor’s questions the way we discussed.”

“Okay.” I bit down on my bottom lip and studied the floor.

“Look at me.” He waited until I met his gaze and his eyes darkened. “I would hate for something worse to happen if you veer away from what we practiced.”

I swallowed. “I know what I need to say.”

“Good.” He went back to scrolling through his emails, and I let out the breath I’d been holding.

The doctor burst into the room with a smile on his face. He had brown hair and brown eyes, and he looked younger than most of the doctors I’d seen before.

He reached forward to shake my hand. “Lucas, how are we doing today?”

I shook his hand with the arm that wasn’t broken. “Fine.”

“I hear you have a small cold. Yesterday, a patient asked me, ‘How do I stop my nose from running?’” He grinned. “You know what I told him?”

I shrugged and shook my head.

“Stick your foot out and trip it,” he said.

It took me a couple of seconds to realize he was joking, but it wasn’t funny to me. It was just a dumb joke.

“Aww. That didn’t bring a smile? How about this one?” he asked. “Why did the house go to the doctor?”

I shrugged again.

“It had a window pane.”

The corners of my mouth tipped up just a little. That was kind of funny.

“Ah . . . I see I’m getting a smile.” He sat down on the rolling stool and moved closer. “Why did the book go to the doctor?”

I lifted a shoulder, a small smile playing at my lips.

Dr. Wilson paused for effect. “Because it had a broken spine.”

“Is this necessary?” Dad shifted in his chair and looked irritated. He glanced at his phone and frowned. “I’m on a time schedule, so if you could hurry this up that would be greatly appreciated.” His voice wasn’t exactly appreciative, but that was Dad pretending to be nice.

Dr. Wilson pressed his lips together. “Of course. Sorry. I just like to see my patients smile.” He asked me a number of questions about my arm: how it was healing, and if I had any pain. He typed my responses into his computer. “All right, let me check a few things out.” He looked into my eyes while shining a light on them and told me to open wide.

After studying my throat, he took out a stethoscope. I remembered my teacher calling it that during a health lesson. He listened to my heartbeat and moved it around to different places on my chest. Lifting my t-shirt just slightly in the back, he placed the circular part on my skin. When he stiffened, I glanced up and saw him frown.

“Mr. Armstrong, would you mind stepping out to the waiting room while I finish my exam?”

Dad’s head shot up from his phone. “Why?”

“I’d like to ask Lucas a few questions and sometimes kids feel more comfortable talking when their parents aren’t around.”

“Absolutely not,” Dad said. “I have a right to be here. You can’t separate me from my son.” His phone rang, and he hit the side button to silence it. “Whatever you want to ask, you can ask in front of me.”

Dr. Wilson nodded. “Okay. Lucas, I just noticed quite a bit of bruising on your back. Can you tell me how it happened?”

I glanced at Dad and then looked at Dr. Wilson, my heart thumping in my chest. “I play a lot of sports at school.”

Dad’s phone rang again, and he silenced it, looking frustrated.

“What kind of sports?” Doctor Wilson asked.

“Baseball, soccer, flag football.”

“You must play rough. Do you know how I know that?”

I shook my head.

“Because the bruises are different colors. That means they’re in various stages of healing. In other words, they didn’t happen all at once.”

“I fell on my back a few times.”

Dad’s phone rang again, and he hit a button and mumbled something under his breath, glancing to the side as if deep in thought.

“It’s normal for boys your age to be active,” Dr. Wilson said. “I remember playing sports when I was a kid. But you need to take care of yourself and not be too reckless or you’ll get broken bones.” He tapped a finger on my cast.

Dad’s phone rang again, and he stood to his feet. “Excuse me, I have to take this.” He put the phone to his ear and walked out the door, yelling at whoever was on the other line.

Dr. Wilson glanced back at me. “Lucas, if I ask you some questions, will you tell me the truth?”

I nodded.

“Do you live with both parents?”

“Just my dad.”

“Is your mom in the picture?”

Letting out a breath, I glanced away. I didn’t like these questions. I hoped he would finish soon so I could go for ice cream with Dad. “No, she left when I was younger.”

“What happens when you do something your dad doesn’t like?”

I froze. “What do you mean?”

“Is there a consequence if you break one of his rules?”

“Yeah.”

“Can you give me some examples?”

“Um . . . He grounds me from watching TV.”

Doctor Wilson nodded. “What else?”

“That’s it. Nothing else happens.”

I looked down and felt sick to my stomach. If I told him what really happened, he wouldn’t understand. Plus, Dad had already told me what he would do if I didn’t answer the way he wanted me to. He wouldn’t just hurt me. He’d hurt my doctor too. I liked Dr. Wilson, and I didn’t want something bad to happen to him. He was kind of nice.

“Is there anyone in your life you’re afraid of?”

I swallowed again. “No.”

“Is anyone hurting you?”

I sat up straighter. “What? No, of course not.” A shiver ran down my spine.

“Okay.” He smiled. “I just wanted to make sure. But if you ever feel like you need to talk with someone, who would you go to?”

“I don’t know.”

He pursed his lips together. “You can always go to a teacher or call the police if someone is hurting you.” He pulled a card from the front pocket of his jacket. “You can also call me.” He studied me longer as if hesitant to end our conversation. “Okay?”

I nodded, taking the card from him. “Okay, but no one is hurting me.”

He looked at me with a concerned expression. “Sometimes it’s hard for kids to talk about things that happen to them, but it’s always better to tell the truth so adults can help.”

My brows drew together. “I am telling the truth. Why don’t you believe me?”

“Because those bruises don’t look like they came from a fall.”

“I . . . They did come from a fall.” He was making me worried, and whenever I got worried I got angry too. I scowled at him. “If you don’t believe me you’re stupid. You need to go back to school.” 

“Woah, buddy. I’m just concerned about you. I’m not calling you a liar.” He let out a heavy sigh. “Excuse me for a moment.”

He left the room, and I sat there for a really long time, wondering where Dad was and how much longer this would take. A few minutes later, Dad finally returned. “Where’s Dr. Wilson?”

“He left.”

“Did he say if we were done?”

“No.”

Dad made a loud noise in his throat and clenched his fists. “I need to get back to the office. This is taking too much of my time.”

“I’m sorry.” I hated feeling like I was in the way, but that’s how it was most of the time, so I was used to it.

The door opened and Dr. Wilson entered the room with a short lady with dark brown hair falling just below her chin. Dr. Wilson cleared his throat, glancing at Dad. “Mr. Armstrong, during my examination of Lucas, I noticed bruising on his back that didn’t look consistent with a fall. I’ve spoken with Lucas, and he denied anyone hurt him, but I’m still required by law to report any suspected abuse.”

“What?” Dad yelled. “That’s outrageous. No one hurt Lucas.”

“I know this is frustrating,” Dr. Wilson said, “but it’s standard protocol.” He glanced at the woman standing next to him. “Rosemary Evans is with CPS, and she will handle it from here.”

Dad glared at me and I shrank back. He turned to Rosemary. “Let’s make it fast. I’m a very important man, and I don’t have time to waste on idiotic assumptions made by wet-behind-the-ear doctors.”

“Of course, Mr. Armstrong,” she said in a low voice. “I just have a few questions.”

Lucas Current Day

Shifting in my seat, I glanced at the time. It was seven o’clock, forty-five minutes after Hillary was supposed to meet me for dinner. Not a surprise, considering she used to keep me waiting all the time when we’d dated. I’d offered to pick her up for our date tonight, but she’d said she had plans and would rather meet afterward.

I’d once heard her tell a friend when she thought no one was around that she liked to keep me waiting because it shifted the balance of power. If that was what she believed—fine. Unlike what most people believed, I didn’t feel I needed to control other people. There were a few exceptions, but the main issue was I didn’t like it when someone tried to control me.

Like Dad for instance. Everything I was doing right now was because of him. Most days when I thought of him I had to push down the growing anger threatening to boil over like a volcano. The man hated me. He’d hated me my entire life and forcing me to marry someone he approved of was another way to exert his control over me and prove who was boss.

I stared out the restaurant window at the ocean waves, watching people jump around and scream playfully. Everyone on the beach was with someone—presumably someone they loved. What a waste. I felt sorry for them. They were all smiles and happiness, but one day they’d figure it out. One day it would finally sink in that love wasn’t real. It didn’t last. People got tired of each other and left. Why put your heart out like that only to have it stomped on?

Now freedom—that was another story. I would give anything to be free. What would my life be like if I broke away from Dad’s influence? If I just walked away from it all, turned my back on everything . . . I wouldn’t ever do it. Too much was at stake. But picturing it made me wistful, made me long for a day when I didn’t have to answer to him anymore.

His health was failing, and I knew that. A part of me would grieve when he passed away. He was my father, the man who raised me. The man who provided a shelter over my head and gave me everything I had now. But the other part? The other part would only feel relief. Relief that I no longer had to live under his tyranny.

A finger trailed up my arm, and I turned to see Hillary, her platinum blonde hair falling over her shoulders in waves. Her blue eyes glittered. “I knew you’d still be here.” She grinned.

I forced myself to smile. “Of course. Haven’t I always waited for you?”

She took the empty seat across from me. “Sorry, I just got caught up. I have a lot of suitors vying for my time.” She winked.

“Nothing’s changed then since the last time I saw you.”

She frowned. “The last time we saw each other you broke things off. Told me you were getting back together with Alexa.”

I grimaced. Unfortunately, she hadn’t forgotten. “Yeah, breaking up was a big mistake.”

“You admit it was a mistake to break up with me?”

For a quick second, I hesitated and averted my eyes. “Yes. Should’ve never done that.”

Her entire face lit up, and I felt a pang of guilt. Still, it was hard to believe she cared about me. She liked my status and what it brought her. She was a beautiful woman—always had been. But we didn’t have much of a connection, and we had even less in common besides the fact that we both came from money. Most of our dates in the past had consisted of me carrying all of her shopping bags and catering to her every whim.

Which is why it hadn’t lasted long.

But whatever reservations I’d had, it was time to put those aside. I had to convince her to marry me. End of story.

I’d planned on telling her everything up front—how I was forced to marry in order to receive my inheritance, how the marriage would be in name only. We’d live separate lives and make occasional appearances together. But something told me to hold back a little. I’d come on strong with Alexa—pushed her into a corner— and she fought back hard. She’d hated the idea of a marriage in name only. Even though I’d offered an unlimited spending account and a house of her own, she still turned me down. She was another one who believed love was the answer.

What a misguided notion that was.

With Hillary, I needed to relax. Let her come to me.

A waiter brought menus, and I flipped through it casually. “I hear they have good seafood here.”

Hillary set the menu on the table. “I’m on a diet right now.”

I gave her a once over. “You don’t need to lose weight.”

She giggled. “I need to lose five pounds, silly. You don’t get to look like this,” she ran both hands down the sides of her waist, “and eat anything you want.”

“So, what does this diet entail?”

“Water with lemon.”

My eyebrows flew up. “So, you’re not going to eat dinner?”

“Nope.” She waggled her brows. “Maybe we should just forget dinner and take a romantic walk on the beach instead. What do you think?”

“I think you should eat.”

“Not going to happen,” she said with a frown. “But that walk sounds awfully nice.” Her lips formed a pout, and I recognized what that meant immediately. She wouldn’t stop until she got her way.

I’d eaten a snack at home so I wasn’t too hungry, but the idea of a romantic walk on the beach . . . Ugh, it wasn’t for me. Still, I’d come all this way to woo her, so I might as well get used to doing things I didn’t want to do.

This was my life now.

The new normal.

“Tell you what.” I closed the menu and stood, offering her my hand. “Why don’t we go on that walk?”

She grinned and took my hand, lacing her fingers through mine. We left the restaurant and headed for the sandy beach.

Two hours later, I drove home with an excruciating headache.

Hillary had complained the entire time about the drama she encountered at the hair salon this morning. Apparently, she was unhappy with the style she’d been given. Something about her beach waves looking unauthentic. I tried to tell her she looked fine, but every time I spoke she interrupted me and went on another tirade about how incompetent the staff was and how she deserved better and didn’t they know who she was?

Whatever.

Enough was enough. I’d ended the evening and scheduled a time to get together tomorrow.

I’d given Sam the night off, and instead of taking the rental, I’d taken my red Ferrari. It stayed at the house for times like this when I preferred to drive on my own.

My stomach growled from missing dinner, and all I could think about was asking Leslie to whip something up for me to eat when I got back. If she’d already gone to bed, then I’d just have to find something—anything. Not eating only intensified the pounding in my head.

Once home, I walked into the house, and this music hit me over the head like a jackhammer crushing into my skull. First of all, it was entirely too loud. And second, it made me want to jump out of my skin.

It was some kind of violin music and the song was hyper and frenzied—way too much for my throbbing head to cope with right now. Maybe Leslie was listening to it in her room. Where was she? I needed to find her so I could talk to her about fixing something to eat. The music was coming from the direction of the staff bedrooms, so I headed that way. It was so loud and obnoxious I wanted to throw something. Putting my hands over both sides of my head, I closed my eyes and took a breath. She needed to turn it off.

Right. Now.

I strode down the hallway towards the bedrooms. I wasn’t even sure which bedroom belonged to Leslie, but the noise would give it away. The sound came from one bedroom in particular, so I raised my fist and knocked on the door.

No response.

The music just kept going on and on. This time I pounded with all my might. “Leslie, this is Lucas. Turn that off.”

The door flew open but it wasn’t Leslie. It was Aria.

Chapter 10

Aria

Lucas stood in my doorway with a scowl on his face, eyes blazing, fists clenched. His gaze dipped to the violin in my hands and his expression hardened. “So, you’re the one who’s making that racket.” He put a hand over his forehead. “That’s right. How could I forget? You brought an instrument. Why did I let you do that?” He looked tired and worn down.

“Racket?”

“Yeah, that noise. It’s awful.”

I blinked. No one had ever said my playing was awful. I didn’t know how to respond to that. Was he just being mean or did he really think I was terrible? I’d obviously upset him and needed to smooth things over. “I’m so sorry. I thought you were out for the evening. Sam said you’d gone on a date and most likely wouldn’t be back until late.”

“As it turns out, two hours is about as much as I can take of date night,” he said, using air quotes and sounding irritable.

“It didn’t go as well as you’d hoped?” Maybe I shouldn’t have asked, but I was way too curious not to.

He stared at me with an unreadable expression. “It went exactly how I thought it would.”

“Is that good or bad?”

He closed his eyes and breathed out. “It just is.” When he opened them again, his gaze fell to my violin once more. “I don’t want to hear that thing again. Put it away while I’m home. Play it when I’m gone if it makes you happy, but don’t play it around me.”

“All right. I’m sorry I disturbed you.”

Maybe I should have been wounded. What he’d said would have hurt most people’s feelings, but I knew I was a good player. My confidence didn’t come from whether or not Lucas Armstrong approved. I wasn’t a professional or anything, but plenty of people had complimented my skills over the years, and I knew how to command a crowd. It was one of the things I loved most about performing on the street.

It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out Lucas was having a bad night. I could cut him some slack as long as he didn’t cross a line.

Something crashed to the ground in another room, and we both stopped talking.

“What was that?” I asked.

“Sounds like it came from the kitchen.”

My eyes widened. “No one else should be home. Leslie told me she was going to a bar and wouldn’t be back until late. Sam isn’t here either. He said he wanted to do the tourist thing.”

“Let me check it out.” Lucas turned and headed down the hallway.

My pulse picked up. It would be safer to stay in my room, but I’d rather know if there was an intruder than wait for him to come to me. Living on the streets, I’d learned it was better to be on the offensive and figure out ahead of time what you were getting into.

I followed close behind Lucas, adrenaline coursing through me at the thought of what we might discover. When we arrived at the kitchen, my jaw dropped open.

Oh. My. Goodness.

Heat rushed to my face.

Leslie and some dude were making out, and the guy looked like one of those cliché men from the nineteen eighties with a hairy chest and several gold chains. Neither of them seemed to notice us, and they just kept on kissing as if we weren’t there. Food was scattered everywhere: pots and pans and plates in the sink and all over the countertop. It appeared like they’d been having a feast and were now engaged in the evening entertainment. How had I not heard them? I must have been too caught up in my music.

I glanced at Lucas and he looked furious . . . Like he was about to explode.

“Leslie,” he said, in a low voice.

She didn’t stop and neither did the man. Where did she find this guy? Had she just met him at the bar tonight?

“Leslie,” Lucas said louder, voice almost shaking with anger.

They both stopped kissing and turned, eyes widening as they saw us standing there.

“Mr. Armstrong,” Leslie said, appearing startled. “Why are you home? Sam said—”

“Who is this?” Lucas gestured to the man. “And why is he in my house?”

The man stepped forward and extended his hand. The scent of alcohol mixed with cheap cologne drifted towards us. “Hi, I’m Dennis Rudamaker.” 

My eyes nearly bugged out now that I had a view of him straight-on. His shirt was unbuttoned, and he had so much chest hair . . . gobs and gobs of it sticking out from underneath the gold chains, and it was all over his face as well. His beard hung down at least five inches past his chin. It was ungroomed and looked greasy. Lucas didn’t shake the man’s hand or even look at him. His eyes remained on Leslie. “What’s going on?”

Her head dropped forward, and she wiped her lips with the back of her hand. “Sam said you were out for the night and probably wouldn’t be back until late. I . . .” She glanced down. “I went out to get a drink and met Dennis. We were just having some fun.”

“I can see that,” Lucas said, glancing around the kitchen. “Did you leave enough food for me?”

“I’m sure there’s something here,” she said in a panic. She started moving dishes haphazardly, and in her haste, knocked over another plate. It fell to the ground and smashed into tiny pieces. “Sorry.”

Dennis smiled awkwardly and pressed his hands together. “Looks like I should be on my way.”

“Oh, don’t go,” Leslie said, clearly flustered. “I’ll cook something for him, and then you and I can continue where we left off.”

“No, the party’s over,” he said, heading for the door.

Leslie ran after him. “Please don’t go. I promise you, it’s okay.” Her tone sounded frantic as if he was the last man on earth, and she couldn’t let him get away.

“Sorry, babe. Things just got complicated, and I don’t do complicated.” The door opened and then slammed shut. From the sound of it, Leslie trailed out the door after him. Her high-pitched voice could be heard, pleading with him outside.

Unbelievable. Was she trying to get herself fired? Not to mention, whatever happened to a woman’s dignity?

She returned after a few moments and wrung her hands. “I can’t believe this . . .” She glanced at Lucas like this was his fault. She began roughly moving dishes to the sink and another almost slipped through her fingers, but she caught it just in time.

“Leslie, what was going on here?” Lucas asked.

“I told you. I met Dennis at a bar.”

“But why did you bring him back to my house? You know I’m not okay with visitors unless you clear it with me first. You didn’t even know this man.”

She ran a hand through her hair, appearing shy all of a sudden. “He was so good-looking, I couldn’t help myself.”

Interesting assessment. Apparently, she liked hairy men. At least it proved there was someone for everyone.

“He could have been a predator for all you knew,” Lucas said. “What if he’d hurt you?” He glanced at me. “He could have hurt Aria.”

She pointed her finger at me and her face turned blotchy red. “She has nothing to do with this.”

“As long as she stays here she does. You brought an unknown man into this house while I was away . . . while Sam was away.”

“It wasn’t a big deal.” She picked up a kitchen towel and began wiping the counters mindlessly.

“It is to me,” Lucas said.

She shook her head, glancing down. “You know what? I’m so tired of your rules. I quit.” She threw the towel down and stormed to her room, slamming the door behind her.

“Wow, I can’t believe she did that,” I said.

“Good riddance. I was about to fire her, anyway.” He winced and massaged his temples. “Just wish she had quit after cooking a meal. I’m so hungry right now I could eat a bear, and my head is killing me.”

“If you want, I can make something for you.”

Lucas glanced at me. “You know how to cook?”

“Yeah, I know a thing a two.”

“I’d really appreciate it.” He grimaced. “I’m going to lay down on the couch for a while until my head stops pounding.”

Leslie walked past us, rolling a large suitcase. She didn’t say anything to either of us before she headed towards the door.

“Hold on,” Lucas said. He opened his wallet and pulled out a wad of cash, running after her. “This will cover what I owe you, plus some for a hotel and plane ticket home.”

I peeked around the corner and watched them. She walked up to him and took the money. “You just made the biggest mistake of your life, letting me go.”

“What did you think I would do? Fight for you to stay after all that?”

Leslie jutted her hip out and put a finger on her chin. “I might consider staying if you double my pay.”

“Nice try.”

“What about—”

“It’s time for us to part ways,” Lucas said.

She glared at him. “You know what? There’s something I’ve been wanting to say to you for a while, and now that I don’t work for you anymore . . .”

“Go ahead. Say it.”

“You have looks. You have money.” Her face screwed up unattractively, and she over-enunciated each word. “But you don’t have a heart. You can’t find a woman to stay with you because you’re just a shell of a human being.” She pushed her finger into his chest, but he didn’t move away. “Empty, soulless, uncaring . . . You have no feelings.” Her eyes narrowed. “Your own mother didn’t even love you.”

I gasped and moved away from my spot by the wall, not caring that they could both see I’d been spying. “Leslie, you’re completely out of line—”

“No, it’s okay,” Lucas said, glancing at me over his shoulder. “She’s right.” He gestured for her to leave. “You can go now.” He didn’t take his eyes off her. His anger had subsided, and he was so calm it was almost eerie.

Leslie must have noticed too because her eyes widened, and she stepped back like she didn’t trust what he’d do next. “I didn’t mean—”

“Yes, you did. Don’t take it back. It’s the truth. And because I don’t have feelings, I don’t care.” He waved her off. “Move along, please.”

She opened her mouth to say something, but the words died on her tongue. She ducked out the front door, phone in her hand, already calling a cab to pick her up.

Lucas turned around and there was so much pain in his eyes my heart caught in my throat. I wanted to go to him and hug him. Comfort him in some way. But I could tell he needed space.

“I’m going to my room to lie down. Don’t bother cooking anything. I’m not hungry anymore.”

Chapter 11

Aria

An hour and a half later, after I’d cleaned the kitchen and was just taking a homemade pizza out of the oven, I heard a door open and close. Feet shuffled down the hallway. Lucas. Sam still hadn’t come home, so I knew it wasn’t him.

Lucas drifted into the kitchen, a hand on the back of his head, sleepy eyes glancing around the room. “You’ve been busy.”

I used a pizza cutter to divide the pizza into slices. “Yeah, figured you might be hungry if you woke up.”

“Good instincts. I’m starved.”

“There wasn’t any pepperoni, so I stir-fried some chicken and put barbecue sauce on it. Hope you like it.” I placed two pieces on a plate and handed it to him. “How’s your headache?”

His forehead creased. “A little better, but I still have this dull ache that won’t go away.”

“Maybe you just need to eat. Try that and see if it helps.”

“If this tastes as good as it smells, I’m going to have to up your pay.” He sat down at a bar stool in front of the kitchen island and picked up a slice. Biting into it, he chewed slowly. “Mmmm . . . This is so delicious.” He bit off another piece that was much too large for his mouth, but it didn’t seem to deter him. He closed his eyes and chewed some more, groaning. “Aria, how did you learn to cook like this?”

I shrugged. “My dad owned an Italian restaurant. I grew up learning how to make pizzas.”

“He did? What is he doing now?”

“He passed away—died from a heart attack.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“It’s okay. It’s been five years, long enough that I don’t mind talking about it.”

He glanced at me between bites. “Do you miss him?”

“All the time.”

He nodded. “Must be nice.”

“What do you mean?”

“If you miss him that much, it means you were close.”

“Yeah, we were.” I put two slices of pizza on a plate and sat down across from him. “He raised me and my brother on his own. My mom died when I was young, but he did his best to fill both roles. He worked hard, but he didn’t just leave us at home. We were always at the restaurant. He loved that place. It was his heart and soul. People used to come, not only because the food was good, but because my dad knew his customers by name. He always took an interest in people’s lives. Made sure they felt welcomed and cared about.”

“Sounds like he was a good man.”

“He was.” I smiled, lost in thought.

“What happened to the restaurant?”

My smile faltered as I remembered those days. “He ran into some financial trouble and had to get a backer. This man offered to invest and become an equal partner. Dad was wary because he’d always had full control over all the decisions, but he had no choice. If he didn’t accept the money, he would have had to shut down. So, he agreed to the partnership and made the man promise that no matter what, all the employees stayed. He didn’t want anyone to lose their job.”

Lucas leaned his elbows on the counter. “Let me guess, the guy stabbed him in the back.”

I nodded. “Yeah. They signed a contract and Dad was never good at reading legal documents. He’d dropped out of high school to help his father run the restaurant when he was a teenager. Education wasn’t one of his strong points, and he was very trusting of people. Anyway, he didn’t get an attorney to look over the contract, and as it turned out, the man had put a clause in there that gave him the ability to make all final decisions.”

Lucas’s eyes were glued to me now, and there was concern on his face. “I have a feeling I’m not going to like what you say next.”

I grimaced. “Turns out, the man didn’t care about the restaurant. He just wanted the land. Apparently, he had plans to build a big hotel right there, and he’d already convinced the other local businesses to sell. It was all handled through different people so my dad had no idea. The restaurant was shut down, his employees were fired without severance pay, and my dad lost everything. It broke him. I believe he died of a broken heart.”

Lucas shook his head and stared down at his remaining pizza. “That restaurant should have gone to you and your brother. I’m really sorry that happened to you.”

“Thanks. It still makes me sad when I think about it. I loved working in my dad’s restaurant and would love to have a restaurant of my own. I was about to go to college to major in restaurant management before Chase went missing.”

“So that’s your dream? To own your own restaurant one day?”

I nodded. “That and own a bright red Volkswagen Bug.” I laughed. “I know it sounds silly, but I just think they’re so cute.”

He laughed. “I can picture you in one of those.” He grew more serious. “I’m surprised you’re not more bitter. To have something like that happen . . .”

“I was at first, but God’s helped me come to terms with it. If He’d wanted me to have my dad’s restaurant, I would have it. He must have other things planned for my life.” I stared at my plate of food, trying to reign in my emotions. “I just want my dad back. If that man hadn’t entered our lives, maybe he’d still be alive today.” I cleared my throat and glanced at him, eyes watering. “Daddy wouldn’t want me to mourn him. He’s in heaven with the Lord. He’d want me to be happy, but it’s hard sometimes.”

Lucas nodded. “I can see how it would be.”

“Over the past few years, I’ve had to work through all the pain. Don’t get me wrong, it still hurts like crazy, but God knew what He was doing. He was involved in every moment—saw everything that happened. He’ll bring about justice. I know He will.”

Lucas bit down on his bottom lip. “So, you’re one of those.”

“One of what?”

“One of those people who believe God cares about your day-to-day activities.”

“He does care. I feel Him with me all the time. I see how He provides for me. Even running into you after losing my job at the café. That was God taking care of me yet again.”

Lucas cocked his head to the side as if considering my statement. “It was a strange coincidence, but I don’t know if I’d attribute it to God. I believe He exists, but I don’t think He cares.”

“He does, and He loves you more than you know, Lucas.”

He winced. “I doubt that.”

“Why?”

He glanced at me like he couldn’t believe I was asking. “Because no one loves,” he paused as if realizing what he’d just divulged. He started over. “No one cares about me, least of all a God who gave me parents that . . .” He didn’t finish. “Anyway, moving on.” He leaned forward and picked up two more slices of pizza and put them on his plate. “You’re an amazing cook, Aria. What if I hire you to be my chef?”

He winked as if attempting to distract me, but I couldn’t move past what he’d just said, and Leslie’s comment about his mom still irked me. “Lucas, what Leslie said earlier . . . That was cruel. You know she was just trying to hurt you, right? It’s not true.”

He shrugged. “It’s common knowledge that my dad kicked my mother out because she was a drug addict. He’s a difficult man. I’m pretty sure he drove her to be that way. She left when I was five and never looked back. Never kept in touch or tried to contact me and my sister. It’s as if she never existed.” He bit into a new slice of pizza and wiped his mouth with a napkin. “Leslie was right. She didn’t love me, because if she had, she would have made an effort.” The pain was so evident on his face, I had to wonder if he’d ever been this vulnerable with anyone before. It was so fresh, raw. If he wanted to hide it, he wasn’t doing a good job of covering it up. 

I reached forward and put my hand over his, my heart aching for him. “She was wrong for abandoning you like that, but it doesn’t reflect on you. You’re worthy of love, Lucas. I’m sorry if you didn’t get it from your mother, but that doesn’t mean no one cares about you.”

“People don’t care.” He sounded irritated, frustrated that I couldn’t see that.

“I care.”

He stared at me for a long moment, and then he drew in a breath, his chest moving up and down from the motion as he let the air out. “Maybe you shouldn’t.”

His eyes were so intense that goosebumps broke out along the back of my neck. He didn’t look away, didn’t break eye contact.

“You try to push people away, but you don’t fool me, Lucas. You want love just like the rest of us.”

He glanced down at his plate. “Love is just a messed-up notion people have. I used to chase it, but I finally grew up and realized it doesn’t exist. Maybe in fairy-tales. Maybe in made up stories.” His eyes found mine again. “It’s like a phantom in the wind. You think you see it out of the corner of your eye, but when you turn to face it head-on, it’s gone. In reality, it was never really there to begin with.”

“Maybe the real problem is you’re waiting to receive it. What if you tried giving it to someone else?”

His eyebrows flew up, but before he could answer, the front door opened and closed. Sam walked in and looked almost startled to see us sitting together.

“Sorry, Mr. Armstrong. I didn’t know you’d still be up.”

“No, problem,” Lucas said. “I’m just eating pizza with Aria. Want a slice?”

Sam smiled and shook his head. “I ate a big dinner. Don’t think I could eat another bite, and I’m pretty tired.” He tipped his chin. “Night, Mr. Armstrong. Night Aria.”

He left, and Lucas checked the time. “It’s eleven o’clock, but after that nap, I don’t feel like going to sleep. Want to watch a movie with me?”

A warm sensation flooded through me. He was including me, letting me be his friend. “Sure.”

“Do you mind wrapping up the rest of the pizza while I set up the Blu-ray?”

“Not at all. It’ll only take me a few minutes.”

After I finished putting away the pizza, I joined Lucas in the main living room to watch a movie. There was only one couch in front of the television, and he’d sat right smack in the middle, not leaving much space for me. I figured he’d move over when I walked up, but when he didn’t, I hesitated, unsure of what to do.

He smirked. “Have a seat, Aria. I promise I won’t bite.”

I sat next to him, just barely brushing his left thigh as I sat down. Warm tingles swept through me at the contact, and it was a little too close for comfort. I felt his body heat radiating off him, and my stomach did a flip. He smelled like sandalwood and coconut suntan lotion. It smelled so good I had to lean in to catch another whiff. Well, I didn’t exactly have to lean in, but I did it anyway.

“What do you want to watch?” he asked.

“I’m not sure what I’m in the mood for. Have any chick flicks?”

He laughed. “Yeah, right. Do I look like the type of guy that has chick flicks?”

“Say no more. What do you have?”

He listed a bunch of action-adventure movies that didn’t appeal to me.

“What about TV shows,” I asked. “What do you like to watch?”

“I don’t watch a lot of TV, but when I do, I gravitate towards reality shows.”

“Really?” My smile brightened. “I love reality TV.”

“All right. Name something you want to watch. I have almost everything.”

“Do you have Challenge your Fear?” I loved that show because it always had a variety of challenging stunts the contestants had to do in order to win money. Most of the stunts were high-risk activities your average person would refuse to do, but some were relatively safe—they just involved lots and lots of bugs.

His smile grew wider. “That’s an old one. You actually watched that?”

“Yeah, we used to watch reruns. The first time I saw it I thought it was horrible. People were eating these nasty bugs, and I nearly threw up. But my dad and brother were into it and they wouldn’t turn the channel, so I started watching more and got into it.”

“I always liked the daredevil challenges more than the bug-eating myself.”

“Totally agree with you there.”

“Challenge Your Fear it is then.” Lucas got up from the couch and found the disk. He set it up on the television and then sat back down even closer to me than before. He put his arm behind me on the couch, and though he wasn’t touching me, he was inches from having his arm around me. Or maybe it was all in my head. My stomach practically turned sideways with all the moving around it was doing.

“I have six seasons, so I’ll just pick an episode at random.”

He chose one where two teams were timed on how quickly they could eat a Camel spider. It was the color of sand and huge, not at all like the tiny spiders you might find on your front porch. A female contestant went first, and when she picked it up with her fingers and lifted it to her mouth, I ducked my head into Lucas’s side. “Yuck . . . I can’t watch this.”

He laughed. “It’s almost over.”

And then he started groaning. “Ha . . . That is so disgusting.”

I peeked, and his face was screwed up. “Wow. Just wow.” He shook his head, laughing. “Takes guts. I give her credit.”

“Do I even want to know what just happened?”

He slapped his knee, still laughing. “Do you seriously want to know?”

Chapter 12

Lucas

“Now you’ve made me curious,” Aria said, shifting on the couch. “I’ve got to know what happened.”

I hit the pause button and turned to face her. “All right, but I’m warning you, it might make you sick.”

She appeared to brace herself. “Just tell me really quick.”

I grinned. “When she put that huge spider in her mouth, the legs were moving and trying to crawl back out.”

“Ugh. I did not need that visual. I shouldn’t have asked.”

“Tried to warn you.”

“That you did. I should have listened.”

“We can speed through the rest if you want until we get to the daredevil stuff.”

She made a face and put a hand over her eyes. “Yeah, let’s do that.”

I sped through the spiders until I got to the stunt. This guy had to walk along the ledge of a skyscraper and retrieve flags for his team.

“Watching that man inch so close to the edge makes my palms go clammy,” she said. “I could never do that.”

“I’d do it in a second. Heights don’t bother me.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Seriously? Or are you just saying that?”

“I’m serious. I base jump, skydive, you name it. Something like that wouldn’t phase me.”

“How do you work up the nerve?”

I shrugged. “I’ve always been a bit reckless.”

“I’ve heard that people who engage in those kinds of sports do it for the adrenaline rush. Is that true for you?”

“Yeah, definitely. There’s this high you get when you jump that can’t be replicated anywhere else.”

I didn’t mention that each time I jumped, I wondered for half a second what would happen if I didn’t pull the parachute—if I let myself free-fall one last time. That wasn’t the type of thing I shared with anyone. But every time I jumped, I was forced to make a choice. I’d always chosen life over death, but one day . . . One day I didn’t know if that would be the final decision. I’d get as much as I could from this world, but when it got to be too hard . . .

Aria brushed her hair to the side with her fingers. “My brother, Chase, was never afraid of heights either. When we were younger, my dad used to take us on frequent hikes. I remember this one time we hiked up a cliff and Chase walked right up to the edge. Dad and I trailed behind, and he had a fit when we finally caught up. He grabbed the top of Chase’s shirt and yanked him back hard. Told him to watch himself, or he wouldn’t get to come next time.” She laughed. “Chase would have liked you.”

I frowned. “Would have?” She hadn’t mentioned her brother died, but she’d said it in the past tense as if he was no longer alive.

“I just meant back then. When he was a teen.”

“And now?”

She glanced to the side. “I don’t know where he is.” She said it so quietly, I had to strain to hear.

“Did you two have a falling out or something?”

She shook her head. “No, it’s nothing like that.”

“Then, why don’t you know where he is?”

She grabbed on to the arm of the couch as if steadying herself. “When my dad died, we didn’t have any living relatives in California that could take us in. My mom had family back in Florida, but they all had families and none of them made the effort, so we went into foster care.”

A sick feeling took hold of me. I’d never been in foster care, but I’d come really close. “Aria, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know that about you.”

“It’s okay. My last home was good, but I did get bumped around a few times due to circumstances outside of my control. After the first placement fell through, they had to separate me and Chase because they couldn’t find a home to take both of us together. We only saw each other once a week, usually on Wednesday evenings. At first, he seemed to be doing well, but then over the weeks, I noticed slight changes. He was less talkative and moody at times. Sometimes he’d pull out his phone and play games during the entire visit, just ignoring me. And then it got to the point where he didn’t want to see me anymore.” Her eyes watered, and she brushed them with the back of her hand. “Something was going on with him . . . I just don’t know what. He wouldn’t tell me.”

My back tightened because I feared what that might mean. It was possible he was being abused. I didn’t want to say it, but that was the stark reality.

I’d lived it.

Experienced the bruises.

Suffered the shame, the feelings of worthlessness.

It ate at me, and most days I pushed it out of my thoughts, but sometimes . . . Sometimes those dark days revisited me in my dreams.

“Go on, I’m listening,” I said, wanting to reach out and touch her, comfort her in some way. The instinct was new to me. My sister and I had an unspoken rule: we didn’t share our feelings with each other. That was just how it was. When it came to other women, I didn’t let anyone close enough, and my relationships hadn’t gone deep enough to get to that place, anyway. Everything stayed on the surface, and no one shared anything emotional. I’d always liked it that way, but with Aria, it felt like we could relate to each other.

“A few weeks after I turned eighteen,” she said, “a social worker informed me that Chase had run away. They’d filled out a missing person’s report and the police looked for him, but he never showed up. I was all set to go to college for restaurant management, but I canceled my plans and devoted most of my time looking for Chase myself. I worked part-time at a restaurant and earned extra cash by playing my violin in popular venues. But my street performing was more about keeping an eye out for Chase and having a pulse for what was going on in the streets.”

“In Dylan’s painting, you were playing to a crowd. I didn’t know the context, but now it makes sense.”

She nodded. “Recently, I got a tip that Chase was at a shelter in Santa Monica, and it turned out to be a false lead. It was the final straw. I realized I needed help, and that I couldn’t do it on my own anymore. That’s when I came to the decision to get a full-time job so I could save money for a private investigator.” She glanced at me and smiled. “And then you came along and offered me a job.”

My chest tightened. We’d met by coincidence. She just happened to be in my vicinity and I’d felt this curiosity about her. But what if we’d never met? This feeling took hold of me. I didn’t know what to call it. Fate? Destiny? Whatever it was, I knew she and I were supposed to meet.

“Aria, I can help you find your brother.”

She whipped around to face me. “What?”

“I have an investigator on my payroll. He does a lot of work for me. He’s good, one of the best. If anyone can locate Chase, he can.”

There was so much hope mixed with pain on her face it made me want to pull her into my arms and comfort her—tell her it would all be okay. I shook my head to clear it. What was wrong with me? I needed to keep my thoughts from going there. I couldn’t get too close to Aria, not when I had to marry Hillary. It wouldn’t be fair to either of them.

I lifted up and scooted further down the couch.

Shouldn’t have forced her to sit so close to begin with.

Yeah, I’d done that on purpose.

The act of moving away left a dull ache in my gut, but I pushed past the disappointment. Whatever happened, I had to fight against every instinct to turn our relationship into something it couldn’t be.

“Lucas,” she pleaded. “I’ll do anything. I’ll work for free if that’s what it takes. I need that investigator to find my brother. It’s been too long . . .” Her voice broke.

“You think I’d let you work for free? Like I said, he’s already on my payroll. I’ll talk to him tomorrow. Write down some basic things for me to give him: his date of birth, where he was living, etc.”

“Okay, I will. You can deduct a fee from my wages if you want.”

“That’s not necessary. I pay him a flat salary for his time. It’s more than enough.”

All of a sudden, she clobbered me, wrapping her arms around my neck. “Thank you so much. You have no idea what this means to me.”

I didn’t hug her back—kept my arms to my side—but when she didn’t let go, my arms slowly enfolded her out of their own volition. My brain told my arms to stay put, but they didn’t listen. We stayed like that for a long time until she finally pulled away and smiled.

“This is the best news I’ve had in so long.” Tears streamed down her face and she smiled, sniffing. “I’m so thankful.”

I leaned forward and wiped her tears away with my thumbs. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

“These are happy tears. For the first time, I feel like I have support. I’ve been shouldering the burden on my own for too long.”

“Let me help carry it for a change.”

She touched my forearm. “You’re my hero, did you know that?”

I drew back, pulling away. “You don’t know what you’re saying.”

She took my hand and refused to let go. “I do know, Lucas. I know exactly what I’m saying.”

The confidence in her voice . . . It almost made me believe I could be the type of man she could look up to. Almost.

“You stepped in and took care of things when Leslie crumbled,” I said. “I like loyalty, and I reward people who are good to me. That’s all it is. Don’t think I’m a hero because I’m not. If anything, I’ve played the villain on more than a few occasions. Just ask Alexa.”

She smiled at me with admiration in her eyes, refusing to listen to what I just said. It was like she saw through the haze, almost as if she saw something in me she liked.  Something no one else had ever seen before.

“It’s not that I don’t believe you’ve done things you regret,” she said. “It’s that I know without a doubt God can forgive you if you seek Him.”

My first response was to contradict her but something stopped me. What if she was right? What if I could find forgiveness? 

All the things I had done came to mind. The cruel things I’d said to people. The manipulation. The lies.

I was my father’s son, like it or not.

No, forgiveness was beyond my reach. 

I was about to tell her that when something occurred to me. Despite everything she’d been through, she was one of the most positive, optimistic people I’d ever met. I didn’t want to squash that by telling her there was no hope for me. Her attitude had gotten her through a lot, and it would continue to help her as long as I didn’t stomp it down.

“Why don’t we table this topic for another day? Still want to watch Challenge Your Fear or are you getting tired?”

“Challenge Your Fear, please.”

I unmuted the sound. “Good because I could watch this all night.”

Chapter 13

Lucas

The next morning, I rolled out of bed at noon. Aria and I had stayed up talking and watching episodes of Challenge Your Fear until the wee hours of the morning. It wasn’t until after the sun rose that we finally turned the TV off and went to our own separate rooms. I’d told her to sleep in as long as she needed, and, as far as I knew, she was still in bed.

I looked outside and saw Sam sitting in the gazebo. Picking up my cup of coffee, I headed out to sit with him. Most of the time, I kept to myself, but I didn’t feel like doing that today. Sitting up all night with Aria made me realize something.

It was nice having someone to talk to.

I usually avoided spending time with people, but hanging out with her made me feel alive in a way I hadn’t ever felt before. She had a way about her. I’d seen it from the first moment we’d met. Maybe it was that she put others at ease.

“Hey, Sam.” I sat down and set my coffee on the table. “Nice morning, isn’t it?”

He looked at me with interest. “Yes, it is. You’re awfully cheerful today.”

Was I? He was right. I was in a good mood. It was the first time in a while. “Guess being in a place like this makes a person happy.”

He nodded slowly, studying me. “Maybe so.”

“Did you have a nice time touring the city yesterday?”

“As a matter of fact, I did.” He watched me again with a peculiar expression on his face.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

He shook his head and smiled. “It’s just . . .” He trailed off as if trying to figure out what he wanted to say. “We come here almost every year, but this is the first time you’ve joined me in the gazebo.”

“Really?” Huh. He was probably right about that.

He chuckled. “I’m not complaining. You’re welcome to join me anytime.”

I took a sip of my coffee. “Noted.”

Neither of us said anything else for a long time. I continued to drink my coffee and Sam stared out at the view. I finally broke the ice. “How are your kids doing? I never hear you talk about them.”

Sam looked at me like an alien had abducted the real me and put a clone in my place. “They’re doing well. My daughter just had another baby, and that makes five.”

“Five? Holy moly. I can’t imagine having that many kids.”

Sam chuckled. “She and her husband love running after those munchkins. I’ll be using some vacation time to visit them soon if that’s okay.”

“Of course. Anytime you want.”

“My son just moved to Washington.” He leaned back in his seat and snickered. “Followed a girl out there. Things are getting serious. Any day now I expect to hear news of an engagement.”

“That’s great.” I’d only meant to be polite, but as I observed him, my heart sunk like a rock in a murky ocean. He was so happy his son had found a woman to love. What would it be like to be happy about getting married? I’d never cared before, but seeing the look on his face—it made me want more for my life.

But it would never happen. My future depended on marrying someone I didn’t care for. I wanted to change the subject, but there was one question I was curious about. “How long were you and your wife married?”

“Almost twenty years before she passed.”

“Why didn’t you remarry?” I hesitated. “I hope you don’t mind me asking.”

He cleared the gravel from his throat. “Not at all. I’m open to marriage, but I haven’t found another woman who even comes close to Rebecca. She was one of a kind.”

“To be honest, I always assumed you didn’t remarry because you liked being single. Marriage is so confining.”

His forehead wrinkled. “I wouldn’t call it that. I wouldn’t call it that at all.”

“I’m not trying to be rude. Just thought maybe you’d rather be free.”

He sat up straighter. “Let me tell you something. Marriage is a lot of hard work, but when two people fall in love and commit themselves to each other, it’s a beautiful thing to behold.”

“Hmmm.” I wasn’t so sure about that.

“In the very beginning of time, Adam was alone. He needed companionship, someone to share his life with. When God brought Eve to him, his whole world changed.”

“How do you know he didn’t like his solitude? Maybe he preferred being alone.”

“No one prefers being alone all the time. Sure, we all like to have moments to ourselves, but as you get older, loneliness eats away at you if you don’t have people in your life to spend it with.”

“What if you had to marry someone you didn’t love?”

Sam leveled me with a hard look. “You never have to marry anyone.”

“You know my father, Sam. You worked with him before you became my driver. The man has a way of making things happen, like it or not, and he wants me to be married to a certain type of woman. He’s given me a list, and Hillary is on that list. I have no choice.”

“There’s always a choice.”

“What are you saying? That I just defy him and refuse to marry her?”

“Yeah. Why not?” He said it so casually like it was no big deal to go head-to-head with my father.

“You don’t understand. If I don’t marry her or one of the women on the list, I won’t inherit his wealth. Everything I have now: my cars, my homes, this place . . . It will all be taken away and given to someone else. Even you, Sam. I’d have to let you go. I wouldn’t be able to afford to pay you.”

Sam was quiet for a few moments, and then he cleared his throat again. “Lucas, I’ve prayed for you every day since I began working for you. I know we don’t talk much, but I care about you a great deal. If you told me today I didn’t have a job anymore because you decided to give it all up for something better . . . I’d say, ‘Good for you.’”

I looked at him incredulously. “You can’t really mean that.”

“I do.”

“How can you say you’d be willing to give up your paycheck?”

“Because I’d rather see you make a decision that isn’t motivated by money.” He shot me a look out of the corner of his eye. “And to find a woman you can be happy with for the rest of your life. Most of all, I’d like to see you come to terms with the fact that you are not a slave of your father. Make your own choices. Live with the consequences of your own decisions.”

My mouth dropped open. “That’s what you’d want? Even to your own detriment?”

“I can find another job. That’s not the issue. We’re talking about your life here.”

I didn’t know what to say, so I looked away and took another sip of coffee. No one had ever put my well-being above their own interests.

“Lucas, let me ask you something.” He waited until I made eye contact. “What are you living for?”

What kind of question was that? It caught me off guard, and I wasn’t sure how to answer. “What does anyone live for, anyway? We engage in the endless rat race until we die. I’m not the philosophical type.”

“You don’t need to be. You just need to know what you want most.”

His words sobered me. I was quiet for a long time after that. Finally, I ran a hand through my hair and let out a breath. “I guess I just want to be happy.” Saying the words made my chest ache because it wasn’t within my reach—would never be within my reach.

“Then I assume marrying Hillary and complying with your father’s wishes will bring you happiness.”

I grit my teeth, irritated. “It’s a lot more complicated than that.”

“Only if you make it complicated.”

Leaning down, I rested my elbows on my knees and dropped my gaze. “Maybe I defy my father, and I still don’t have that elusive thing—that thing I’ve been chasing my entire life. At least the other way I keep my inheritance.”

“Perhaps,” he said. “But you’ll never find true satisfaction from that money. You’re trying to fill a void with things only God can fill. He loves you, and He wants you to—”

“God doesn’t love me.”

“On the contrary, He loves you so much He sent His Son to die for you.” Sam got up from his seat. “Wait here for just a minute.” He hurried into the house and came back a few minutes later with a Bible. It looked old and worn and the spine was falling apart. “This belonged to my father. He gave it to me before he passed away.” He handed it to me, eyes tender. “I’d like you to have it.”

My eyes widened. “Sam, I can’t take this. Don’t you want to give it to your children one day?”

“My children have other heirlooms to pass on, but I want you to have this. I’m giving it to you because I want you to understand how important it is to my heart that you read it. If I gave you a regular Bible, I’m pretty sure you’d toss it to the side and never look at it again.”

“I wouldn’t know where to start.”

“The book of John is a good place to begin.”

“I don’t have time.”

“We always find time for things that are important to us.”

“I’ve never been interested in religion. It’s just not for me.”

“It’s not about religion,” he said. “It’s a relationship with the Lord. A way of life. Something that takes place in your heart. He changes you on the inside.”

I let out a heavy sigh. “I don’t know about all that, but I’ll read it for you.”

After that, I put away Sam’s gift and headed into town to pick up Hillary for our next date. It went about the same as the first time, and two hours seemed to be the tipping point. Either my tolerance level had diminished or Hillary was starting to grate on my nerves even more than the last time we dated.

This time, she’d whined the whole time about the locals. She appeared to think they were hindering progress because they didn’t want to hand over their homes to big city developers. Apparently, her father was involved in local negotiations, and she had a strong opinion about it.

I was all for business and what made the most money—that was how I handled most of my contracts—but I thought it was crazy she didn’t understand why someone would want to hold on to their home. It seemed pretty obvious to me.

We’d argued about it for twenty minutes before I’d given up and said I had other things to do. Pushing down my frustration, I’d scheduled to see her the next day. Courting her was starting to look like a very slow process. But what could I do? I could barely handle spending two hours at a time with her. Once we married, we’d have to go our own separate ways.

To make things even worse, I couldn’t stop thinking about Aria. I found myself daydreaming about rushing home to see her. Maybe I’d take her on a hike or something. This entire situation was entering a danger zone, but I couldn’t seem to stop myself. We’d barely been here two days and my feelings had already gone further than they should. I let out a bitter laugh. So much for putting distance between us. Staying up watching TV and talking with her all night was hardly the definition of distance. 

Instead of going home, I camped out at a little beachside pub and tried to kill time. I pulled out my phone and called Pete Jensen, my private investigator.

“Hey, Pete. It’s Lucas.”

“Hi, Mr. Armstrong, what can I do for you today?”

“I need you to look into something for me. One of my employees has a missing brother last seen in Santa Monica.” I gave him the pertinent data Aria had given me the night before with his date of birth and other identifying information.

“It may take a little time, but I’ll get on it right away.”

“Thanks. This is important, so let me know as soon as you have any leads.”

“You got it.”

When I finally arrived home, the house was quiet, and no one was around. Sam and Aria must have both gone to their own rooms.

Relief and disappointment washed over me. Relief because I didn’t know if I could stay away from Aria, and disappointment because I didn’t want to stay away.

So, I did what I do best.

I pushed down my feelings and went to bed.

Chapter 14

Lucas, 18 years old

“A Pete Jensen is here to see you.” Jenny, one of the administrative assistants for the floor stood at my doorway looking almost nervous. “He said it was very important he speak with you. I told him you were busy but—”

“Let him in.”

“Of course, Mr. Armstrong.” She ducked her head and scurried out like a mouse running from pest control.

I’d been working for Dad over the summer since graduating from High School, and, apparently, the staff were afraid of me. Dad had made it clear to everyone that I was the eyes and ears of this office, and anyone who veered out of line would be put on a list. It hadn’t gone over well, and, needless to say, my coworkers stayed away from me as much as possible. Not a big shocker there. Dad probably thought he was making me a leader by giving me that kind of power. Instead, he’d managed to alienate me from the people who might actually teach me a thing or two.

There was a knock on the door and Pete Jensen entered. “Mr. Armstrong, I have the information you requested.”

“Great. Come in and close the door behind you.”

He did so, taking a seat across from my large mahogany desk. He handed me a manila folder, his expression impartial. I couldn’t tell if the news was bad or good, but that was one thing I liked about Mr. Jensen—he always kept things professional.

“Before you look through everything,” he said, “there’s something you should know.”

“What’s that?” I sat up straighter, folding my hands, trying to hide the anxiety that must show in my expression.

“She has another family now. A husband. Two kids.”

I felt the blood drain from my face, and I gripped the edge of the desk. “Is she okay?”

“She appears to be fine. Lives in a middle-class suburb of Dallas. She’s a part of the local PTA and has a bunch of women over every Wednesday for some kind of ladies’ group.”

Mom left when I was five and Calista was just a toddler. Dad said he’d kicked her out because she was a drug addict, and he didn’t want her behavior to affect us. For as long as I could remember that was the story I’d been told. For years, I’d worried about my mother, wondering if she was dead or alive. I hadn’t heard a word from her in thirteen years, but now that I was a legal adult and Dad couldn’t monitor what I did as easily, I’d hired Pete to find her.

I opened the file and the first page had her address and phone number. Glancing up, I met Pete’s gaze. “Did you talk with her?”

He shook his head. “No. You asked me to be discrete. She never saw me.”

“Good.” I reached across the table and shook his hand. “Thank you.”

He stood and walked to the doorway. “Let me know if you have any questions, but you should find everything you need in that folder. I was very thorough.”

“I appreciate it.”

He vacated the office, and I was left alone to go through the file. A part of me was scared of what I would find. The other part felt this irresistible need to connect with the woman I once called mother, no matter what I found. What if I just picked up the phone and called her right now?  

Without thinking it through, I dialed her number and waited as it rang.

A distinctly female voice answered. “Hello.”

I froze, not able to speak past the lump in my throat.

“Hello,” she said again.

I breathed out a little too loudly and put a hand over my mouth, too overcome with emotion to say anything.

“Look, if you won’t answer, I’m going to hang up.”

“Wait.” My heart was racing in my chest, knocking against my ribs, but I couldn’t let her hang up.

“Who is this?” She sounded alarmed now.

“It’s Lucas.”

There was a long moment of silence. “Lucas who?”

A dull ache settled in my gut at that question. “Lucas Armstrong, your son.”

She gasped. “I don’t have a son.”

“What?” Had Mr. Jensen given me the wrong information?

“I have two daughters.”

Pete was too good at his job to mess something like that up. “It’s me, Mom. It’s Lucas.”

She started to cry, and for several minutes her soft weeping filtered through the phone. I wasn’t sure what to say, so I waited.

When she quieted, it was another few seconds before she spoke again. “How did you get this number, Lucas?”

“I hired a P.I. to find you.”

She laughed bitterly. “Just like your father.”

“So, you acknowledge you have a son?”

“Yes. I was thrown off guard.”

“It’s okay. I know this must be hard for you.”

“It is.” She sniffed. “Lucas?”

“Yeah?”

“You shouldn’t have called.”

My stomach clenched, bringing waves of nausea that swept over me like the ocean tide. She hadn’t meant it the way it sounded. It had to be that she was afraid of my father. “I had to know if you were okay.” I barely got the words out.

“Things are better off the way they are.”

“Haven’t you wondered about me over the years? And Calista?”

“Of course, I’ve wondered about you, but you’re not a part of my life anymore. I had to leave. I had to get out of there.”

“Dad pushed you out, didn’t he? He threatened you.”

“I’m sure you know by now how your father is.”

“It’s been thirteen years, Mom. I deserve to know what happened. Were you on drugs?”

“What? No. I never did anything like that.” She sighed. “Your father is an evil man. He was always out with other women, and I couldn’t live that way anymore. I had to get out.”

“Okay. I can understand that. He is a difficult man. But why didn’t you come to see us after you left?”

“Because your father wanted me back, and I refused to be in a relationship with him.”

“So you cut ties with your children?”

“He told me he’d take you and Calista away from me if I tried to fight him in court. I had nothing, Lucas. There was no way I could have won.”

“Did you even try?”

“He was too powerful.”

“Why didn’t you attempt to see us again? Why did you just disappear from our lives?”

“It’s complicated, Lucas. The short answer is that I needed to put it all behind me. The thought of seeing you with your father . . . It hurt me too much.”

“It hurt you?” A rush of anger shot through me. “What about us? Didn’t you think Calista and I were hurting because we didn’t have a mother?”

She began to cry again. “You don’t know how hard it was for me, but I had to let you go. I had to move on with my life.”

“You left us with him.” I nearly choked on the words. “You thought he was evil, and you left us.”

“He would never hurt you. He only wanted to hurt me.”

I closed my eyes to gain control. A feeling of despair settled over me like a rain cloud hovering over a small town, threatening to let loose any second. “Sure, if that’s what you want to believe.”

“Lucas, please don’t take this the wrong way, but I can’t have contact with you. Your father may be monitoring you and if he finds me . . . I have two other children to think about.”

“You’ll protect them but you wouldn’t protect us?” I got out of my seat and paced next to the window. “I don’t understand this. I thought he forced you to leave, but you’re the one that left. How could you do that to us?”

“I’m sorry. I really am. But it couldn’t be helped. If you were in my place, you would have done the same thing.”

“No, I wouldn’t have,” I said, voice rising. “I would never have left my children with a man like him. You abandoned us.”

“Do not accuse me. I did my best. You had more than I had growing up.” Her voice grew almost hysterical. “I’m sure your life hasn’t been all that bad.”

I couldn’t say anything. My throat was dry and thick and the words wouldn’t form on my tongue.

“You have no idea how hard it was to walk away,” she said.

“Yeah, whatever.” I paused, glancing out the window. “Did you ever love us?”

“Of course I did. A mother doesn’t ever stop loving her children.”

“You just love them more. The new kids you replaced us with—they’re your priority now.”

“When you put it like that, you make me sound like a terrible person.” She started to cry again, but I didn’t feel bad for her. She’d left us, and she didn’t even care. “Lucas, this has to be our only conversation. Your father—”

“Don’t worry. I won’t call again.” I slammed the phone down and then gripped the sides of my head, pushing in like I could somehow smash it to pieces.

In ten seconds, I obliterated everything in sight. The folder with my mother’s information, the paperwork on my desk . . . I ripped it to shreds and anything else that was in the way. I picked up my chair and threw it across the room. It knocked against the wall and fell back hard onto the floor.

Several people came running and stood in the doorway, looking in at the mess and at me quickly unraveling.

“Are you okay, Mr. Armstrong?” Jenny asked in a panic. “What happened? Can I do something?”

I clenched my fists and heat rose to my face. No, I was not okay. No, there was nothing she could do.

Unless she could rewind time and give me a new mother.

And a new father for that matter—that would have been nice too.

I burst out of the room, past the growing line of onlookers, gawking at me as I left. The air was stifling. I needed fresh air so I could breathe. The roof had a patio, but it was office policy not to go up there for everyone’s safety. Fortunately, I had a key. I took the stairs two at a time and unlocked the door. Pushing it open, I sucked in the cool air.

On another day, I would have said the view was amazing. Tall skyscrapers filled in the space above and below. Vehicles moved on the streets, looking like tiny toy cars from where I stood. I drew closer to the edge of the building, my chest heaving up and down. My heart rate picked up, and the muscles in my back tensed.

I’d always pictured Mom as a drug addict, needing help, and getting the boot from Dad. The truth was that she’d left because she didn’t know how to fight for us. It was less complicated to just let us go. To start over with a new family.

The pain in my chest was so acute it hurt every time I inhaled. 

It would be so easy to end it all right now.

I took a step closer to the edge. And another. And another. Until I couldn’t move forward anymore.

Until I was holding onto the railing so hard my knuckles turned white.

The door leading to the stairs slammed open and my father appeared at the top. His face was red, and his brows were crushed into angry slashes. “Lucas, get over here.”

I turned away, not able to look at him. If he hadn’t been so miserable to live with, maybe Mom would have stayed.

“Lucas William Armstrong, get over here now.”

I could do this. In a few seconds, it would all be over. A calm settled over me, and the pain began to subside. A feeling of numbness took over.

Dad strode towards me, his shoes slamming against the ground as he got closer.

“Lucas,” he said, his voice louder now. “Get away from the ledge. Think about what this will do to me. It’ll be on the news. Everyone will know. My reputation will be tarnished.” That was all he cared about—what it would do to him. “Go away. I don’t need you.”

“Your sister,” he said, almost in a panic. “Think what this will do to her.”

The image of Calista’s face, distraught and crying came to mind, and my body stilled.

It would kill her. He was right about that.

I closed my eyes and blew out a breath.

If I did this, I would be just as bad as Mom. Calista would have no one but my father. She would have to deal with him on her own.

“She adores you, Lucas. This will scar her for life.”

Calista had gone through enough. No matter how I felt, I had to think of her.

Before I could change my mind, I hastily turned around and brushed past Dad to the door. “You misunderstood my intentions. I was just looking at the view.”

Chapter 15

Lucas, Current Day

“No!” I sat up in bed with a start, breathing hard. Sweat dripped down the side of my forehead, and I clenched the sheet.

Still half-asleep, I tried to think why I’d just yelled out.

Dreams. Bad dreams. They’d lasted all through the night or at least appeared to.

I was a kid again, trying to get away from him. My father stood over me, his shadow looming like a dark specter, a belt in his hand. He was about to unleash his rage upon me. A rage that felt so real . . .

And then the image shifted to the roof of his building in New York City. The decision I’d almost made in a matter of seconds. The agony of finding out my mother had another family, and she didn’t want anything to do with me.

Somehow, my dreams changed, and the last thing that flashed through my head before I woke up was an image of Hillary and me at the altar, saying our vows. Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?

An unsettled feeling swept over me. It seemed as if the air in my room was closing in on me, and I had to get out of there.

I swung my legs over the bed and got up, heading to the kitchen to get a drink of water. My body felt like it had been through the wringer. As if I’d jogged twenty miles and couldn’t get enough oxygen. Nausea twisted and curled in my stomach, and at the last second, I ran to the nearest bathroom and vomited. I leaned over the sink and turned the faucet on, splashing water all over my face and swishing it in my mouth to get out the awful taste. Walking back to the kitchen, I raked a hand through my unruly hair.

The dreams had been happening more often—ever since Dad told me I had to get married, or I’d lose everything.

It should be simple enough. Marry Hillary. Go our own separate ways. Once Dad was no longer around, get a divorce.

Why couldn’t I be okay with that?

I thought I had been.

Clearly, I was not.

I pulled out a glass and filled it with water from the refrigerator door. Sipping it, I closed my eyes and tried to calm the anxiety that seemed to be welling up, faster and faster, like an erupting geyser splashing to the surface.

In the distance, I heard something . . . the faint sound of music. My brows drew together. It sounded far away. I could just barely make it out.

What was that?

It didn’t sound like it was in the house, but there weren’t other homes or businesses in the vicinity.

I slipped outside and the sound grew louder, so I followed it to the side of the house. My home was surrounded by acres of green grass, and in the distance, a lone figure sat on the ground, playing the violin. Aria.

Blinking, I shook my head to clear it. Was I dreaming again? Or was this real?

The cool air blew against my face, reminding me that I was very much awake. What was she doing up at this hour?

I walked over to her and stopped a few feet away. “Aria.”

The breeze swept through us and it must have muffled my voice because she didn’t respond, didn’t seem to even notice I stood there watching her. Her eyes were closed, the violin tilted at the base of her neck, arm working the bow back and forth, fingers moving up and down over the strings. She was lost in the music, her head bobbing, black hair falling over one shoulder and swaying as she moved.

She was so beautiful it actually hurt to look at her. I couldn’t believe I’d thought she was average when I’d first met her. She was not average. At all.

I needed to say something else to get her attention, but I couldn’t. Watching her under the moonlight felt unreal. And at the same time, it grounded me. Brought me back to reality. The dreams had left a horrible aftertaste . . . But seeing Aria like this filled me with awe because there was so much peace surrounding her. It nudged at my heart. Left me almost breathless.

The music seemed to have a different effect on me tonight. The last time I’d heard her play, the song had been hyper and choppy and high-pitched. Tonight, it was slow and melancholy. Restful. Filled with longing and heart.

The way she moved when she played, the graceful curves of her body, the serene expression on her face—it left me yearning to reach out and pull her into my arms, touch her to know she wasn’t a figment of my imagination.

I knew it was wrong. I shouldn’t be watching her like this without her knowing, but . . . I couldn’t stop myself.

Slowly, the song came to an end.

She opened her eyes.

And then she screamed.

Aria

As soon as the scream left my mouth, I realized who it was. “Lucas, you scared me. I didn’t hear you walk up.”

“Sorry.” He stared at me with this dazed look, almost as if he was seeing me for the first time. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“I woke you, didn’t I? I’m so sorry.”

He’d made it clear he didn’t want me to play my instrument when he was around, but I thought I’d get away with it while he was asleep, especially if I stayed outside. I’d spent all my time cleaning while he’d been out for the day, and my fingers had longed to touch my violin. My music—it was like a part of me, and it was hard to give up. When I’d woken up in the middle of the night and couldn’t go back to sleep, I’d taken the violin outdoors and played, getting lost in the melody.

“You didn’t wake me up.” He looked troubled: eyes dark and haunted by something, shoulders stiff, hair in disarray. He wore pajama pants and a white t-shirt that stretched across his muscular chest, and he was incredibly good-looking. The man didn’t appear to look bad under any circumstances, but something was off. He didn’t seem himself.

“Are you okay?” My eyes lingered on the lines drooping from his mouth. “You seem bothered by something.”

His hand swiped through his hair on the back of his head and stayed there. “I . . . I just couldn’t sleep. Do you mind if I sit here while you play?”

My head jerked back in surprise. “Really? I thought you hated—”

“I shouldn’t have said that the other day. I wasn’t feeling well.”

“All right. If you want, you can have a seat.”

He plopped down beside me and stared out in the distance, appearing lost in thought. Concerned. Pained.

I wanted to press him for information. Had something happened? Maybe things with Hillary didn’t work out.

My chest tightened because the thought of him being distraught over her sparked a jealous side I didn’t like. So stupid. There was nothing between us. But I couldn’t shake the desire to know this man better.

I picked up my violin and played a slow, soothing song. He seemed to need soothing right now, and the instinct to comfort him was almost overpowering. More powerful than anything I’d felt in a long time.

We sat like that for a while, neither of us saying a word, and I played a collection of songs I knew would help him relax.

Twenty minutes or more must have passed before he finally turned to me. “Aria, do you remember when we met at Coastal Heritage Museum?”

I held back a grin. “It wasn’t that long ago.”

He tried to smile, but it was as if a dark cloud hovered over him and wouldn’t allow him to. “I know.” He was quiet for another minute before he spoke again. “That evening, I was looking at a painting by Fernando Ortega. It was of a man on top of a building, viewing the cityscape all around him.”

“I think I remember seeing that one.”

“It shook me up, Aria.”

I put my violin down and turned towards him. “Why?”

“About eight years ago, I got devastating news about my mother, and it nearly broke me. I headed up to the roof of my father’s building and . . . and . . .” He trailed off. “Let’s just say it was a difficult time in my life. In the last few years, I tried to put it out of my head, but that painting . . . It wouldn’t let me forget.” His eyes met mine. “And then I saw you standing there, your beautiful hair falling over your shoulders like it is right now. There was something about you that night—you were like an angel. You caught my attention, distracted me from my thoughts. I felt drawn to you in a way I’ve never felt drawn to anyone.”

My heartbeat increased like a steady drum. What did he mean by that? Drawn to me as a friend? As more than that? He’d told me before that he liked me and that I was a distraction. But it was hard to imagine a man like him being interested in someone like me. Not that I wasn’t attractive—plenty of people had called me pretty over the years—but I was a nobody. Just a girl with no family, barely making it in this world.

I didn’t want to deceive myself by thinking someone like him felt anything for me when he could have drop-dead-gorgeous women like Alexa Covington. Well, Alexa had broken up with him, and she was now with Dylan. But she was stunning, and that was the type of woman he’d been with. Hillary was probably just as breathtaking.

To be honest, I felt drawn to Lucas as well, though I would never voice my thoughts on the matter. I couldn’t let my heart go there. It was important that I kept a close watch over my feelings, or I would quickly lose sight of why I was here in the first place.

And just in case he had meant he was drawn to me as more than a friend . . . Maybe I needed to clarify so he didn’t get the wrong idea. The last thing I wanted was to hurt or mislead him.

I reached over and touched his arm. “I know I work for you, but I want to be your friend.” There. That should make things clear.

His eyes flickered with something. Tenderness, maybe? “I’d like that.” He put his hand over mine and kept it there for several seconds.

He didn’t seem disappointed with my statement, which meant he really had only wanted friendship. I was confusing myself out here in the tropics, under the moon, sitting next to the most handsome man I’d ever seen in my life.

Obviously, he only wanted friendship.

“Now that we’ve settled that we’re friends,” I said. “I’ll share something as well.” I was quiet for a few moments, drawing the memory from the archives of my brain. “Remember when I told you I was homeless?”

He nodded, his expression darkening at my words.

“There was this one night when I begged God to take me.” I glanced at him, and his eyes were attentive, waiting for me to share my story.

“What happened?” he asked.

“I was curled up behind a dumpster off of 5th Street. It was in the back of a restaurant, so I felt relatively safe, but I probably shouldn’t have, considering the area. The shelters were all full, and maybe I could have found one on the other side of town, but I was just so tired. Foolishly, I thought I could find a place to curl up and it would be fine, but it was anything but fine. I was fearful of rats and insects, so I wrapped my arms around my legs, too stiff to get any sleep. It was miserable, and all I could think about was how alone I was.”

I glanced up at Lucas to gauge his response. He listened, giving me his full attention, and there was no judgment in his eyes. My hands moved restlessly over the grass. It was a hard memory to share, but I felt like it would help him.

“My father had died from a heart attack,” I said, “my brother was missing, and there I was, smelling stinky trash and crying my eyes out.” I blew out a breath and waited a few seconds to gather my thoughts. “It started to rain, and the water was pounding down on my head and face, washing my tears away. I felt pitiful, but even more so, I was angry with the Lord. I remember saying, ‘Why God? You’re supposed to protect me. Can’t you even stop the rain? Do I mean so little to You that You won’t even do that?’”

Lucas reached over and took my hand, lacing his fingers through mine. I knew I should pull away, but his hand was so warm and comforting, I didn’t want to let go. He was only doing it to be supportive, but it would probably mess with my head a little.

“I pleaded with God to take me to heaven that night, but He didn’t.”

Lucas squeezed my hand. “I’m glad He didn’t.” 

“Me too.” I glanced away. “The next day, one of the workers at the restaurant, Tommy, told me that a man had been stabbed the night before—the same night I slept behind the dumpster. Tommy said the man who was stabbed frequently came to the restaurant with another man, and they often hung out by the dumpster out back, smoking pot. Tommy had seen them many times before whenever he took a cigarette break. Anyway, that night they stayed inside the restaurant because of the rain. They had a dispute and one stabbed the other. An off-duty cop happened to be there, and he tackled the guy before he got away.”

“You were that close to the incident?”

I nodded. “It didn’t hit me right away, but later when I thought about it, I realized that if God hadn’t sent the rain, they would have gone out back like they normally did, and I could have been in the middle of all that. Even though I’d accused God of not protecting me, He used the rain to keep me safe.”

“Maybe He should have kept you from being homeless to begin with,” Lucas said, bitterly.

“He could have. But then I would’ve missed out.”

“Missed out? On what?”

“I learned something that night. I learned that although I don’t always understand God’s ways, He knows what He’s doing. I learned to trust Him after that. Now, when things aren’t going the way I think they should, I remember the rain.”

Lucas stared at the ground for a long time. “I wish I could trust Him.”

“All you have to do is ask for His help. Put your faith in Him.”

He stood to his feet. “Come on, we should probably head back inside. I have a full day tomorrow, and I promised Hillary I’d take her on a helicopter ride.”

“Right.” The words struck me across the face. At the mention of Hillary, I felt a prick of sadness, but I didn’t understand why I felt that way since I knew Lucas and I couldn’t be together.

I got up and followed him back to the house, reminding myself the entire time about the rain.

Chapter 16

Aria

The next morning, as I dressed in my room, I heard female voices somewhere in the house. Curious as to who they were, I headed towards the kitchen. Two women wore t-shirts that said: Sally’s cleaning services. They were setting out cleaning supplies and talking amongst themselves.

A sinking feeling settled at the bottom of my stomach. What was going on? Was Lucas displeased with the way I’d cleaned his house? We hadn’t been here long, but perhaps I’d disappointed him. Or maybe I’d gone too far by sharing that story last night. He’d abruptly said he wanted to go inside after that.

“Hi,” I said, cautiously. “Can you tell me why you’re here?”

The younger of the two women glanced at me. She was pretty, with shoulder-length brown hair and almond-shaped eyes. “Mr. Armstrong contacted our agency this morning, and we’ve been assigned to clean his house for an indefinite amount of time. Who are you? Are you his wife?”

I blushed. “Oh, no. I’m one of his staff.” I couldn’t bring myself to tell her that I was the one who was supposed to be cleaning his house. My stomach churned, and a hopeless feeling swept through me. I shouldn’t have opened up so much last night. By doing so, I’d probably made Lucas uncomfortable and now I’d lost my job.

“Oh, there you are,” Lucas said, walking in from the other room. He glanced at the other women and then at me. “I was hoping to speak with you before they got here.”

“What’s going on?” I lowered my voice. “You never told me you were unsatisfied with my work. Are you firing me?”

His eyes widened. “Is that what you think? That I would fire you?”

I nodded, willing my tears not to fall. “Why else would you hire a cleaning service?”

“Because I have another job for you.”

Oh. I hadn’t even considered that possibility.

Relief flooded through me, and then curiosity. What other jobs were there for me to do? He’d jokingly asked me to be his chef the evening we stayed up all night, and it had come up again later in the early morning hours. But we’d agreed that wasn’t something I was ready for. I knew how to cook a little, but not enough to take Leslie’s place. Since then, he’d arranged for our meals to be delivered to the house from a local restaurant.

“What is this other job?”

He bit down on his bottom lip and ran a hand through his hair, looking very uncomfortable all of a sudden. “Uh . . . Let’s talk about this in the other room.”

I followed him to a small office, and he sat on one of the couches. I took the chair catty-corner to him and studied him for a moment. He seemed uneasy, which only served to make me even more curious. “What’s this about, Lucas? You never mentioned giving me a new job.”

He leaned his elbows on his knees, appearing uncertain. “That’s because I just thought of it last night.”

“Okay.”

He wouldn’t look me in the eye. “I need you to assist me . . .”

“Assist you with what?”

He finally met my gaze. “I want you to accompany Hillary and me on our dates.”

My mouth dropped open. “Say what? I think I misunderstood you.”

“When I take Hillary out, I’d like for you to join us . . . as my assistant.”

That was exactly what I thought I’d heard. Was he crazy? I frowned. “And what would I be assisting you with?”

“I just need you to be there.”

I raked my hand through my hair and looked at him incredulously. “You feel sorry for me, don’t you? You’re unhappy with the job I’ve done, but you’re too nice to fire me, so you came up with a useless job for me to do instead.”

He cracked a smile and leaned back against the couch, spreading his arms out on either side of himself. “You’ve done a wonderful job cleaning this house. I have no complaints, and I have no problem firing anyone, by the way.”

“Then what’s going on?”

He crossed his foot over one knee and cleared his throat. “You’re a calming influence. Last night, I realized that when I’m feeling . . . agitated . . . you have a way of grounding me. Your presence is soothing.”

Wow. Okay. I hadn’t seen that coming. Apparently, I had an effect on the man. “Are you sure this is a good idea? Won’t Hillary be unhappy I’m tagging along?”

He waved a hand. “She’ll get over it.”

“I don’t know about that. If I were in her position, I wouldn’t like it.”

“Trust me. It’ll be fine.”

“What if I said no? Will you let me go back to cleaning?”

He stared at me for a long moment, his expression beseeching. “Please help me with this, Aria. I need you.”

My heart fluttered in my chest like a dog wagging its tail. He needed me?

Oh, for goodness’ sake. He hadn’t meant it the way I was taking it. It was just a figure of speech, a way to get me to agree to this plan of his. Still, the pleading in his eyes told me he was struggling with something.

“Before I say yes, I need more direction on what I’m supposed to do.” I wrung my hands in my lap and shifted in my seat. “And I need to know why you’re asking me to do it.”

“Like I said, I need you there. You can participate in the conversation, but you don’t have to do anything special. Just be at my side. As to why, I told you already. You have a reassuring presence.”

“Do you suffer from social anxiety?” I blurted out the question before I had the chance to consider my words.

He laughed like I’d amused him. “That’s funny.”

“Is it?”

“Yeah. I don’t have social anxiety.”

“Then why do you need a calming influence?”

He grimaced. “Because Hillary has a way of putting me on edge, and I need a buffer.”

“But if you plan on marrying her, you’re going to have to spend one-on-one time with her. I can’t always be there.”

“Don’t think of this as a normal dating situation. It’s not.”

Obviously. It sounded like he didn’t like her very much and didn’t want to be alone with her.

“Have you told her your intentions yet?”

He shook his head. “No, but I will.”

“I’m not sure I’m comfortable with this. She won’t understand why I’m tagging along. Haven’t you ever heard the phrase, ‘three’s a crowd?’”

“At this point, I haven’t made any declarations of commitment, so there’s no reason we can’t all hang out together.”

“I guess so.”

“So, will you do it?” He sat up straighter and leaned eagerly towards me, waiting for an answer.

Could I do something like that? It would be less strenuous than cleaning, but on the other hand, it would be really awkward.

“You still look doubtful,” he said. “What if I increase your salary?”

“Honestly, it’s not about the money. I just don’t want to be in the way.”

“You won’t be. You’ll be helping me a great deal.” He sighed. “What if we try it out a few times? If it’s not something you want to continue, you can go back to cleaning the house.”

How could I say no when he’d done so much to help me? I nodded reluctantly. “All right. We can try it out.”

“Thank you. We have a date later this morning. I’m taking Hillary on a helicopter ride and then lunch afterward. When we’re done eating, we might go on a hike or walk along the beach.”

Oh, great. A helicopter ride. Like I wanted to deal with more flying. I closed my eyes, wincing. Why Lord?

***

Hiking called for sneakers, right? But this was a date, so maybe I needed to dress up more. Wait, a second. This wasn’t my date. It was a date between Hillary and Lucas, and I was the person crashing their date. I had to drill that into my head before I allowed myself to think any differently.

The whole thing felt weird, and I could only hope that Hillary didn’t hate me after this. If I was going on a date with a guy, and he showed up with another woman every time, that would be the end for me. But what did I know?

There was a knock on the door.

“Come in,” I said, putting a few items into a tiny light blue travel purse.

Lucas entered, looking much more upbeat than he had an hour ago. “Hillary called. She’s running late and won’t make the helicopter ride. She’ll meet us after for lunch.”

I put a hand over my heart and let out a breath of relief. “Oh, good. Now we don’t have to go on the helicopter tour. To be honest, I was freaking out about it.”

“Well, I haven’t canceled it yet because I thought the two of us could still go, but if you’d rather not—”

“I’d rather not.”

He frowned. “You’ll have to take a plane back to L.A. when this trip is over. Wouldn’t it be easier to get over your fear by flying as much as possible before then?”

He was probably right, but the thought wasn’t appealing.

“What about the rain?” he asked.

“Is that the forecast for today? Maybe we should cancel the hike too.”

He smiled. “It’s not supposed to rain today, but isn’t that your key phrase to remind yourself that God is looking out for you?”

Ugh. He got me there. I wanted to tell him to forget about what I’d said earlier, but that wouldn’t be very honoring to God. I couldn’t just lift the Lord up and then later say I didn’t trust Him. “Fine. I’ll go. But only this one time. No more flying after this until we go back to L.A.”

He had a satisfied glint in his eye. “Good. I can agree to that.”

“It only seems fair that if we work on one of my fears, we deal with one of yours as well.”

He laughed. “I’m not afraid of anything.”

“Somehow I doubt that.”

“It’s true.”

I gave him a skeptical glance and pointed a playful finger at him. “I’m keeping my eyes open, and when I find it, we’re going to take a good look at it.”

He ran a hand over the back of his head. “Sure. Whatever.”

“By the way, does Hillary know I’m coming along today?”

He shook his head. “No, I didn’t get a chance to mention it to her.”

Of course not. “So, you’re going to spring it on her at lunch?”

He shrugged. “It’s not a big deal. Like I said before, things are casual at this point.”

“All right. You’re the boss.”

He smiled. “I like it when you call me the boss.”

“But you actually are.”

He tapped me on the nose. “I knew there was a reason I liked you.”

We headed out of my room and out the front door where Sam was waiting in the SUV for us. Lucas and I both got in the back seat. Sam seemed a little surprised that I was going with Lucas, but he didn’t say anything about it or ask why. We all drove in silence until we arrived at a local helicopter company.

“You’ll be glad to know we’re using one of the most respected companies in town,” Lucas said, glancing at me. “It’s not some rinky-dink place.”

“I assume you would never sign up with a rinky-dink place.”

“Absolutely not,” he said as Sam pulled the car into a parking space. “I’m just letting you know so it’ll reduce your fear and put you at rest.”

The only thing that would reduce my fear at this point was getting out of the helicopter at the end of the tour, but I nodded politely anyway.

Everything went quickly from there. Lucas checked us in, and we waited for twenty minutes before it was our turn to go. It was only an hour and a half tour, but I started worrying I’d have to use the restroom while we were in the air, so I must have camped out in the bathroom at least three times before we left. Lucas was a good sport about it and didn’t say anything.

Once we were inside the helicopter, the pilot introduced himself as Rick, a former air force veteran. He had white hair and a friendly smile though he seemed a little calm. As in too calm. As in maybe he’d fall asleep on the job calm.

I breathed in and let out the air. And then did it again.

Lucas looked over at me. “You okay?”

I nodded. “Fine.” So not fine. My stomach was already doing ripples as we lifted off the ground. I closed my eyes. Please, Lord. Please, Lord. Please. It was short, given how nervous I was, but God knew what I meant. I wanted to be safe.

Lucas took my hand. “You’re fine. Just keep reminding yourself of that. You’re going to love the view. I’ve been on this tour many times, and there’s nothing like it. In fact, we’ll see parts of Kauai we wouldn’t be able to see except by helicopter. There aren’t even roads leading to some of the places we’re going, they’re so wild and untamed.”

“All right.”

“You said that like I’m about to give you a spoonful of awful tasting medicine, and you’re bracing yourself for the worst.”

“Sorry. I’m just trying to deal.”

He squeezed my hand as we flew over the surrounding area. “I promise you’re going to love this. It’s so amazing you won’t want to come back to earth.”

That wasn’t likely. “How many times have you done this?”

He considered for a moment. “More times than I can count.”

“Then why did you feel the need to do it again today? We could have just canceled.”

“Because,” he lowered his voice, “I wanted you to see it.”

A shiver ran down my spine at the intimacy in his tone. He’d said it like it actually meant something to him. His eyes were tender as he looked down at me, and I felt myself slowly relaxing. He rubbed circles on the top of my hand with his thumb, and my stomach flip-flopped. Nothing like a shot of endorphins to calm anxiety.

“Look,” he said, pointing out the window. “There’s the Grand Canyon of the Pacific, also known as Waimea Canyon.”

My eyes widened as we flew over the rugged canyon filled with sharp ridges and valleys, the colors so astonishing they took my breath away. Several shades of green and rust and brown were mixed together like a master painter had created his finest work of art. Waterfalls were scattered throughout, and I longed to get closer and feel the mist on my face. A light sprinkling of rain came down, and a colorful rainbow stretched across the sky as a reminder that God was with us.

My mood instantly lifted.

I felt it in my body as well. The warmth of God’s Spirit comforting me, giving me grace at this moment. The fear wasn’t gone, but it was fading fast.

“Waimea Canyon is a geological wonder at fourteen miles long and thirty-six hundred feet deep,” Rick said through his earpiece. He shared some other trivia, but I was so glued to the view that I didn’t register what he said.

Once we flew over the canyon, Rick informed us that we were headed for the Na Pali Coast. “It’s inaccessible to vehicles,” he said, “but you can enjoy it by helicopter, catamaran, or even by kayak.”

Lucas squeezed my hand again, drawing my attention away from the window. “Are you enjoying this?”

“I am. You were right. It’s stunning.”

We’d been holding hands this entire time, and I probably should have pulled away, but I couldn’t make myself do it. We were sitting so near to each other that I had a chance to observe his face up close: the sharp cheekbones, his lightly tanned skin, his full lips, and eyes that were both blue and green—I couldn’t decide which color they resembled more. The five o’clock shadow that had sprouted overnight. The rich brown hair that curled just slightly at the ends but was unruly in a masculine way.

His lips turned up at the corners with a smirk as he took in my expression. “You’re staring, Aria. Do you like what you see?”

Heat washed over my neck and face at the realization that he’d caught me examining him, and I tried desperately to think of a quick-witted response. Unfortunately, the kind of answers I wanted never came to me that fast. I usually thought of something good to say hours later when it was too late. “Uh . . . That’s a loaded question.”

He cocked an eyebrow. “How so?”

“If I say yes, you’ll think I’m flirting. If I say no, you’ll feel like I’ve just insulted you.”

He glanced up at the ceiling and laughed, licking his lips. “I suppose I can see your point when you put it like that.”

“Good. Glad that’s settled.”

His gaze lingered on my face longer than necessary. “But I’d still like to have an honest answer.”

I hesitated, unsure how to respond. There was no way I was telling him he was drop-dead-gorgeous. He had a lot of confidence, but now that I knew him better, I didn’t think he had a huge ego. But I was sure he’d been told how good-looking he was by multiple people—especially women. Lots and lots of them.

He didn’t need one more person saying it.

“There are a lot of things we’d like to have in this world,” I said. “But we don’t always get what we want.”

His eyes flickered with humor, but when he turned away, he looked almost sad. “You’re right about that. In more ways than one.”

I thought that would be the end of it, but seconds later he faced me again, and he ran a thumb lightly across my cheek. “You’re still blushing.”

My face warmed even more as if the act of pointing it out brought on a whole new wave of awkwardness. “Maybe your question embarrassed me.”

He turned a little more towards me, seeming extra interested now. “And why is that?”

“Because . . . You’re my boss.” Our eyes locked and my pulse jumped and then took off running. I swallowed. “I’m sure you can understand that.”

He broke out into a huge grin, and I almost stopped breathing. I’d never seen him smile like that before, and I was afraid that if I moved, it might go away. It was the most brilliant thing I’d ever seen, and that was saying a lot considering the paradise we were currently witnessing.

“You’re really not going to tell me if you like what you see?” he asked. “I promise I won’t hold it against you.”

I smiled sheepishly. “Sorry, but that’s just going to have to remain a question in your mind.”

“Because you don’t want to come across as flirting?”

“Right.”

He laughed. “Kudos to you for holding back a little. Most women can’t wait for an opportunity to flirt.”

“I guess I’m not most women.”

“No, you certainly are not.” He ran his thumb over my cheek once more. “But this right here tells me all I need to know.” He turned away, looking smug all of a sudden.

“I wouldn’t make assumptions if I were you,” I said, pulling my hand away.

He winked. “Too late. Assumptions have already been made.”

Great. What was I supposed to say to that?

“And by the way,” he said, growing more serious. “I’m not embarrassed to tell you that when I look at you, I like what I see. In fact, I think you’re like no one I’ve ever encountered.”

I was speechless. Butterflies danced inside my stomach, and to my mortification, my face heated even more.

Thankfully, I didn’t have to reply because our pilot, Rick, jumped in. “On your left is the beautiful Na Pali Coast, running six thousand, one hundred and seventy-five acres. The cliffs along the shoreline rise as far as four thousand feet above the Pacific Ocean.”

I turned towards the window and gasped. Words couldn’t describe the scene before me, but if I had to try, I would have said that God had a special place in his heart for Kauai because He’d taken care to form every ridge and valley and crevice. If Kauai was a crown, the Na Pali Coast was one of its most prominent jewels.

The deep blue of the ocean water was almost unreal, contrasted next to the jagged-edged cliffs, covered in bright green vegetation. Tears sprung to my eyes, and in that moment, my torn heart healed a little from the pain and the loss I’d experienced from my past. It wasn’t that it went away entirely, but the loveliness of this view lessened the hurt just a little. If God could create a work of art like this, surely, He’d do something amazing with my life if I trusted Him with my future.

We hovered along the coast, taking in its spectacular beauty, and then Rick brought us right up to a huge waterfall. We were so close, a shot of fear charged through me, but it didn’t detract from the awe I felt.

When we finally touched down to the ground, I let out a sigh. “Thank you, for that, Lucas. That was beyond my expectations. I’ll never forget it.”

“I knew you’d like it.” He winked at me, and my heart fluttered in return.

I had to learn how to control my reactions to him. This was getting out of hand. Suddenly, the space was much too small for the two of us, and I needed to get out of the helicopter before I hugged him or something.

“There’s Hillary,” Lucas said, sounding surprised as he pointed to a tall blonde. “We were supposed to meet at the restaurant.”

Her arms were crossed at her chest and one of her feet tapped impatiently as she glared in our direction. She wore a poofy pink miniskirt and a flimsy white tank top that left little to the imagination. I’d been right about her being gorgeous. She was more than gorgeous, and the sinking sensation in my stomach alerted me to how difficult this was going to be for me.

The classic book, Jane Eyre, came to mind: Mr. Rochester forcing Jane to sit with him while he entertained Blanche Ingram. This wasn’t the same thing, of course. While Mr. Rochester did it to see how Jane felt about him, Lucas wanted me there to ground him. Still, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was poor Jane right now.

Glancing again at Hillary, I winced. “She doesn’t look very happy.”

“No, she doesn’t,” Lucas said. “She doesn’t look happy at all.”

Chapter 17

Lucas

Whatever high I’d felt from the helicopter ride began to slip the closer we got to Hillary. She crossed her arms and tapped her bright gold stiletto on the ground as if she’d been waiting hours for me to arrive. Her lips were pressed together in a pout, and she flipped her blonde hair and eyed me suspiciously.

“There you are,” she said, obviously put out. “If I had known you were still going on the helicopter tour, I would have pushed myself to come.”

She never pushed herself to do anything, but, okay, I’d take her at face value. “We can reschedule another tour if you’d like.”

She flipped her hair again. “No thanks. That tour is old news.”

“Oh. I thought you just said—”

“Who is this?” She glanced at Aria and then looked back at me.

“Aria is my assistant. She’ll be joining us today.”

“Do you have work you have to do in the city later?”

“No, nothing like that.”

She stared at me like she wanted more of an explanation, but I’d learned a long time ago that no explanation was necessary. I didn’t have to enlighten anyone about my plans. They either rolled with it or we parted ways. It was as easy as that. People usually rolled with it because they figured I had a good reason.

And in this case, I had a very good reason though I wouldn’t tell Hillary that.

I led both women to the parking lot where Sam was still waiting for us. Aria hurried to the front before I could stop her, so I was stuck in the back with Hillary.

Glancing at her, I forced myself to smile. “I was surprised to see you here. Thought we were meeting at the restaurant. How did you know we’d be here?”

“You didn’t answer your phone, so I contacted Sam.” She flashed an alluring smile. “When you broke up with me the last time, I never deleted all Lucas-related contacts. I kept them just in case.”

That was a good sign. It meant she wasn’t entirely opposed to furthering our relationship, but for some reason, it made me uneasy. “Well, I’m glad the number came in handy.”

She snuggled up against me, and I stiffened involuntarily. I relaxed my shoulders and put my arm around her, still feeling stiff. It just didn’t feel right, so I lifted my arm and scooted away an inch to give both of us some breathing room. Hillary glanced at me in surprise and then shrugged like she didn’t really care, anyway.

“I spoke with your sister today,” she said, batting her eyelids in that overly flirtatious manner she used when she was with me. Sometimes I wished she’d just be herself instead of putting on an act. It never felt like she wanted me to like her because she liked me back. Quite the opposite, in fact. I’d always gotten the impression it was more about having power over me in some way.

She wanted to draw me in like a lasso was tied around my neck . . . er . . . waist. It never worked. In fact, it made me push her even further away, and that was a shame since I needed to close the distance between us if I was going to make this work.

“So, you spoke to Calista?” I asked. “What did she have to say?”

Hillary giggled. “Your charming sister gave me the rundown on everything that happened with Alexa.”

I winced. “Do you have to bring her up?”

She blinked a few times. “Why? Do you still have feelings for her?”

“No. I just don’t feel like talking about her.” I felt bad about how I’d handled things with Alexa. Maybe one day I’d be able to make it right, but at this moment, I didn’t want to think about it.

Hillary linked her arm through mine. “Good. That’s what I wanted to hear.”

She chatted about her nail appointment earlier and showed me the jeweled decals she’d chosen this time around. “Aren’t these the most adorable things you’ve ever seen?”

“Yeah, they’re nice,” I said distantly, glancing out the window.

“I almost chipped this one on my way to meet you,” she said, tapping a long fingernail on my leg. “That would have been a complete disaster.”

“I’m sure it would have been.” I restrained myself from rolling my eyes and ran a hand through my hair. Tilting my head back against the seat, I closed my eyes and counted to ten.

“This lady did just an okay job,” she prattled on, holding her hands out in front of her. “It’s so hard to find good help these days.”

“They look fine to me.”

She made a display of laughing, but it sounded fake. “That’s because you’re a man. Men have no experience with these things.”

“You’re right there,” I said, blank-faced. I didn’t mind her talking about her nails and hair and all that stuff. I just wished she wouldn’t focus on it so much. Even Alexa had other interests.

“I was also supposed to get a pedicure today,” she said. “But I was afraid I’d miss lunch.”

“So that’s why you were running late and had to cancel the helicopter tour.”

“Yeah, had to make sure I was all put together.” She wiggled her fingers in my face. “My mama always told me that if you put yourself first, your man will be happy as well. Because when you’re happy, he’s happy.” She smiled and scooted closer.

“Does it ever work the other way around?”

She frowned. “What do you mean?”

“If I put myself first, will it make you happy?”

Her forehead wrinkled. “That’s not how it works. The woman is supposed to put herself first.”

“All the time?”

“Yes, all the time.”

I turned towards her and gave her my full attention for the first time since we’d been in the car. “There’s never a give and take?”

“Well, you’re missing the point. If Mama’s not happy, no one’s happy.”

“But you’re not Mama.”

She tapped a long nail on her collarbone. “I’m the woman in this scenario.”

“So that means you should always get your way? Is that what you’re saying?”

She ran a fingernail down my arm. “Don’t I always get what I want?”

I shrugged, already bored with this line of conversation.

She chatted on about meaningless details, and my attention veered towards the front of the vehicle. Sam and Aria seemed like they were having a better time than us. They conversed in low voices, but I caught glimpses of their smiles. I strained to hear what they were saying, but they spoke too quietly. Sam made a crack about something and Aria threw her head back and laughed, placing one hand over her mouth as if to mute the sound. I wished it was me up there with Aria, making her laugh right now.

I leaned forward in my seat. “What’s going on up there?”

Sam cleared his throat. “Nothing Mr. Armstrong. Sorry to bother you.”

“Aria? Care to share?”

She glanced back with a mischievous grin. “Sam suggested taking me to the beach after we drop you two off. Said I deserved a day off. What do you think?”

Sam’s eyes were full of humor as he looked at me through the rearview mirror. I gave him a hard look. “No one’s taking a day off today.”

Hillary crossed her legs and put a hand on my shoulder. “Good for you.” She spoke in a low voice that only I could hear. “Put your employees in their place.”

I shrugged her hand off my shoulder and stared out the window. This was going to be a long day.

Aria

Sam pulled up in front of the Crystal Cove Eatery, and Lucas, Hillary, and I got out of the car and headed towards the entrance. It appeared to be an upscale restaurant close to the beach with gorgeous ocean views no doubt.

Lucas held the door for us, and once inside, Hillary glanced at me and Lucas with a startled expression. “Why is she coming with us?” She looked at me as if she saw right through me. Like I wasn’t a person worth her effort.

“I told you,” Lucas said. “She’s my assistant. She’ll be joining us today.”

Her eyes flashed. “You’re really going to bring your assistant with us on our date? I thought she was just coming along for the ride. Why can’t she go with Sam?”

“Because I asked her to join us,” Lucas said, lips tight. “I take my assistant with me wherever I go. Do you have a problem with that?” He gave her a look that dared her to object.

Her mouth dropped open. “Oh . . . well . . . You are a busy man. I suppose it’s not a big deal.”

But the expression on her face said it was a big deal. I didn’t blame her, this was an odd situation with a capital O.

Lucas hesitated, looking conflicted. “We’ll find time, just you and I . . . Sometime in the future. But since we’re just getting reacquainted, I thought we’d take it slower this time.”

“Oh,” she said, appearing satisfied with that answer. “You want to make sure this time sticks.” She smiled and linked her arm through his. “I guess I can put up with a third wheel . . . this time.”

I didn’t appreciate being called a “third wheel,” or being talked about like I wasn’t standing right next to them. This was exactly why I didn’t want to do this in the first place.

“She has a name,” Lucas said. “It’s Aria.”

Hillary begrudgingly looked at me. Her eyes caught on my sneakers and her gaze traveled all the way up to my face, settling there for a few seconds. She had a smug grin as she turned away, appearing satisfied I wasn’t a threat.

The two of them walked ahead, following the hostess, and Hillary sashayed her slender figure from side-to-side, balancing perfectly in her mile-high stiletto heels. She had to have other clothes to change into if we were going on that hike afterward, but I didn’t remember seeing her with a bag.

We stopped at a booth in the corner of the restaurant where the views of the ocean were perfect. Hillary sat on one side and Lucas motioned for me to slide in on the other. Once I did, he sat next to me.

“Maybe I should sit in the next booth over,” I whispered, hoping he’d go along with that idea.

He shook his head slightly. “You’re sitting with us.” His expression was determined, and I had a feeling I shouldn’t press the issue.

The hostess handed us menus, and for the next few minutes, we were all silent as we explored our options. Everything was expensive, including simple items like a sandwich and fries. I settled on the least expensive item and set my menu down on the table.

Something sharp hit my leg, and I jumped a little. What was that? Lucas and Hillary didn’t seem to notice because they were both buried in their menus. I tried to glance under the table discretely, but it was impossible to do without completely leaning over.

Lucas sighed and closed his menu. “I know what I want. How about you, Hillary? What will you be getting today? I hope it’s more than water and lemon.”

“Water and lemon would do a lot of people good. Most of us could stand to lose a few pounds.” Her eyes wandered to me and she smirked. 

Did she think I was fat? I was hardly fat. Maybe I wasn’t as skinny as she was but come on now . . .

“By the way,” Hillary said, smiling demurely. “I happened to visit Island Jewelers the other day, and I came upon a pair of diamond earrings I just adored. They’re oval with tiny diamonds circling a much larger diamond in the center.”

“They sound nice,” Lucas said.

“Just thought you’d like to know in case you want to get them for me.” She glanced shyly at him from underneath her eyelashes. “Speak to Thomas. He knows the exact pair I want.”

Lucas nodded. “Done.”

“Oh, and here’s a list of other things I’d like.” She pulled a piece of paper out of her purse and handed it to Lucas.

He didn’t even blink. He folded it in half and shoved it in his pocket. “Got it.”

My jaw almost dropped to the ground, and I had to smother a laugh. Was that how they normally operated? She told him what she wanted, and he bought it for her? How unromantic was that?

Something piercing hit my leg again and this time I realized she was swinging her foot and the sharp part of her heel had just collided with my leg. I reached down and rubbed the sore spot. I was sure it was an accident, and she hadn’t meant to do it. If only her heels weren’t so pointy.

The waiter came to the table and we all ordered. He took our menus and left in a hurry. Suddenly, the air felt stale, and I shifted awkwardly in my seat. No one seemed to know what to say, and we all just sat there for at least a couple of minutes, eyes darting around the restaurant. Lucas stretched like he was tired and then rested both arms on either side of the booth.

He and Hillary chatted about mundane things for a good fifteen minutes or more, and the whole time Hillary kept giving me the evil eye. I was trying to fade into the background so they’d have privacy, but it seemed that wasn’t working. I felt bad for her, but at the same time, if she was a nicer person, Lucas wouldn’t have asked me to join him in the first place.

When the waiter brought out our food, I bit into my sandwich and silently wished this lunch would be over soon.

“Why are you here, anyway?” Hillary asked, looking right at me.

I didn’t have an answer for that, so I glanced at Lucas.

“She’s my assistant, and I asked her to come along. We’ve been over this.”

“But she’s not doing anything.”

“That’s between me and her,” Lucas said, his expression stone-cold and almost scary. It was definitely in her best interest not to contradict him. I wouldn’t have contradicted him at that moment.

She pulled her wavy blonde hair over one shoulder and gave each of us a scrutinizing look. “Is there something going on between the two of you?”

Lucas and I both said no at the same time.

She glanced at me again. “Because he practically has his arm around you.”

“Are you kidding?” Lucas asked. “My arms are resting on top of the booth.” He didn’t move his arms or even budge.

“I’ve been watching your body language the entire time, Lucas,” she said. “You might think I’m an airhead but I’m not. It’s obvious you prefer her over me. Your body language speaks volumes.”

Lucas frowned. “What are you talking about? I’ve been attentive to you this entire time.”

“The way you’ve been leaning in towards her. The glances you steal when you think she’s not looking.” She took a sip of water. “When you and I talk, you’re preoccupied, like you’d rather be somewhere else. I noticed it back in the car. It seemed like you would prefer talking to her.”

“That’s not true,” I said, alarm bells going off in my head. He wasn’t interested in me. He couldn’t be.

Hillary’s gaze swung back to me, and I felt that sharp pain on my leg again, but this time it felt like she was trying to dig a hole in my leg.

“Ouch.” I leaned down to rub the area.

“Something wrong?” she asked innocently, eyes laughing.

“Your heel keeps hitting my leg. Could you please—”

“Lucas, do you want to be here with me?” she asked, bringing her gaze back to him.

“I invited you to spend the day with me, didn’t I?”

“That’s not what I asked.”

He coughed. “I thought we were hanging out, getting reacquainted.”

“I thought so too, but you aren’t up to my expectations this time around.”

My eyes widened. Why did I agree to this? Awkward wouldn’t even begin to describe how I felt right now. Who wanted to be in the middle of a relationship discussion between two other people?

“And what are your expectations?” he asked.

“When you’re out with me, I should be the center of attention. Your eyes should be on me the entire time.”

She had a point. No one wanted to go on a date and feel like the guy was interested in someone else though she had completely misconstrued what was going on here. Lucas was not interested in me, but even the most beautiful women in the world were sometimes insecure under the right circumstances.

“I’m sorry if you feel that way,” he said, removing his arms from the top of the booth and leaning them on the table. “I’ll make more of an effort.”

She stared at him for a long moment. “No, I want something more.”

“The earrings and everything on that list will be delivered to your hotel tomorrow,” he said.

She shook her head slightly. “My daddy will buy those things for me if I ask. I need something else from you.”

“What’s that?” he asked.

“Proof that you prefer me over her.”

“What kind of proof do you want?” he asked warily.

“Fire her.”

“What?”

“You heard me. Fire her right now, and I’ll know you value your relationship with me more than this . . . employee of yours.” She said the last part with so much venom a shiver ran down my back.

“You’re being ridiculous,” he said. “Aria has nothing to do with you and me. Don’t put her in the middle.”

“I don’t have time for this,” she said with a flick of her hair. Her lips pinched together, and her face was slowly turning red. “Choose right now. Me or her.”

Lucas stilled, and I braced myself for him to choose her. He had to. She was his sole purpose for traveling to Kauai in the first place.

A wave of sadness hit me because I’d come to appreciate him as a boss, and the idea of my stay here coming to a sudden end made me regretful. It was probably for the best though. My crush on him had only gotten worse, and that wasn’t good considering he wanted to marry this woman.

“Lucas, I need an answer. Now.” She gave him a hard look, hands folded on the table, waiting for his response.

He didn’t flinch or even hesitate. “Goodbye, Hillary.”

She seemed stunned at first. Her mouth opened wide like she couldn’t believe he’d just said that. She looked at him and then at me. “You’re making a huge mistake. I am so much better than this—”

“Kind, beautiful, genuine woman,” Lucas said.

Hillary opened her mouth again, her lips twisting with anger. “She’s . . . She’s . . .”

“Don’t say it,” Lucas warned. “I won’t allow you to put her down.”

Her face colored, and without a word, she gathered her purse and walked away, swishing from side-to-side as she went.

I turned to him in shock. What had he just done?

Chapter 18

Lucas

I took cash from my wallet and slapped it on the table. “Come on, let’s get out of here.”

Aria looked astonished. Almost as astonished as I felt, but, in all honesty, it never felt so good to say goodbye to Hillary.

Every word that came out of her mouth aggravated me. There was no way I would fire Aria. The thought of hurting her . . . An ache settled in my chest just thinking about letting her go. That was non-negotiable. I’d have to figure something else out.

We left in a hurry, and since I hadn’t had time to text Sam to let him know we were done, I led Aria to the parking lot with my hand on the small of her back.

“I’m sorry about what happened in there,” I said. “I didn’t know she’d react like that.”

“She definitely got territorial, but I don’t understand why you didn’t fire me, Lucas.”

We were at the car, so I opened the door and motioned for her to get in. I slid in after her.

“Where to?” Sam asked.

“Ke’e Beach.”

He nodded. “Are we waiting for Hillary?”

“No. She won’t be joining us.” There was a note of finality in my tone, and Sam must have picked up on it because he smiled slightly as he pulled out of the parking lot and headed for the road. 

“Isn’t Ke’e Beach a good distance away?” Aria asked. “I remember the pilot saying it’s on the other side of the island when he was talking about the Na Pali Coast.”

“It’ll take a couple of hours, but it’s worth it. It’s the most beautiful beach on the island.”

“Why are we going there?” she asked.

“I need to get away from everything.”

“Are we going to talk about what happened in there?”

I shrugged. “It’s not important.”

“But your whole purpose in flying out here was to win over Hillary.”

“Plans change.”

“I know it’s not my place to question you, but what are you going to do now?”

That was certainly the question of the day. What was I going to do? I let out a heavy breath. “I’ll have to look into the other women on my father’s list. I don’t know them, so introductions will have to be made first. It’ll be more difficult, but I’ll think about that later. Nothing has to happen right away. I say we take a couple weeks on the island to enjoy ourselves.”

“I’m so sorry. I feel like this is all my fault,” she said.

“Hey.” I reached out and put my hand on her head, ruffling her hair like she was my kid sister though I definitely didn’t see her that way. “Don’t ever think that. I asked you to come. That’s on me.”

“She would have been a difficult woman to be married to, anyway. When she gave you that list of items to buy for her . . . I almost laughed out loud.”

Despite the foul mood I was in, my lips couldn’t help but curl up at the ends. “That was nothing. You should have seen the list she handed me last time.”

“I can’t believe she actually expected you to buy that stuff for her.”

“That’s how she is. She knows I can afford it, and she sees herself as entitled.”

We drove the rest of the way in silence. Aria fell asleep at one point, but I was too restless to sleep. I should have been anxious that I’d turned Hillary away. Dad would be furious when he found out it hadn’t worked out with her.

Still, it felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

We stopped at a place that sold bathing suits and snorkel gear on the way so we’d have everything we needed.

When we finally arrived at Ke’e Beach, Sam dropped us off and then circled back to park, while Aria and I headed to the restrooms to change.

My eyes widened when Aria came out of the restroom wearing the modest one-piece bathing suit she’d insisted on getting, even though I’d tried to convince her to choose a bikini instead. She was breathtaking. The red suit with white polka dots had a vintage look, and it was more of a dress than anything else, with a ruffle on the bottom, white straps, and a big white bow at the top. With her black hair, she reminded me of a nineteen fifties pin-up girl. I swallowed hard and looked away.

“Ready?” I asked, feeling shy all of a sudden.

“Yep.” She took me in for a moment, eyes lingering on my arms and chest while a pretty blush swept over her face. Apparently, she did like what she saw even though she’d refused to admit it on the helicopter.

We headed over to the sand, the wind whipping against us as we walked. Ke’e Beach was small, with crystal blue waters surrounded by palm trees and lush vegetation, but it was one of my favorite places in Kauai. There was a coral reef and plenty of colorful fish to observe underwater, and the best part was the atmosphere had a private feel to it. It usually rained every time I came, but there wasn’t a cloud in the sky today which was unusual for this side of the island.

We laid out our snorkel gear on the sand and walked down to the ocean, wading in until the water was up to our knees.

“This place is incredible,” Aria said. “I’ve never seen anything like it. I feel like I’m in a movie or something.”

I laughed. “How do you figure that?”

“I don’t ever see scenery this amazing unless I’m watching it on a big screen.” She smiled. “This is certainly a trip of a lifetime. I probably won’t get to do this again. I want to soak it all up and file it away in my memories.”

“You’re young. I’m sure you’ll make it back here one day.”

“I hope so. Maybe my brother will be able to come too.”

“By the way, I spoke to my investigator. He’s on it, and he’ll let me know when he has something.”

“Thank you, Lucas. That means a lot to me.”

Her eyes watered, and a protective feeling washed over me like the ocean waves, surprising me with its strength. Aria mattered to me. Being with her right now, standing on this beach . . . meant something. Something I didn’t understand completely. Something I didn’t want to understand because I sensed it would tear me apart if I looked at it too closely.

There was a stirring in my gut, an awareness that hadn’t been there before. This woman . . . I wanted her. At my side. All the time.

The realization was both exhilarating and frightening.

It was everything I longed for and nothing I could have.

Spending time with her was dangerous, but I had never been afraid of danger before. I soaked it up, basked in the explosion of adrenaline that shot through my veins, reckless and wild.

Reaching down, I smoothed a lock of hair behind one ear and then allowed my hand to run down the length of her black tresses. Her eyes widened, but I couldn’t stop myself. Taking a few strands, I wrapped them around my finger, fascinated.

I blinked, needing to come back to earth but not wanting to, and, somehow, I found my voice. “No tears today. Let yourself have fun. I don’t want you worrying about anything.”

Her lips curled up in a slow smile. “Okay, but does that mean I get to go first?”

“Go first for what?”

She stooped down in the water and cupped her hands, splashing water all over me. A small wave lifted up and came crashing down, finishing the job and thoroughly soaking the both of us.

“You did not just do that.”

She shrieked and turned to run away, but I caught her by the waist and flipped her around so fast we were chest-to-chest. The warmth of her breath tickled my neck, and an electrical current traveled between us, running all the way down my body. My heart began to pound furiously, knocking against my chest as if had a will of its own and wanted the freedom to fly.

The breeze blew through us, catching her hair and raising it off her shoulders. The scent of the lilac shampoo I’d stocked in my home lifted to my nose. I wanted to breathe in more . . . breathe in more of her. My eyes fell to her lips as they parted, and without thinking, I leaned in closer and put a hand on the back of her neck. “So beautiful. Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?”

Her eyes widened again, and before I knew what I was doing, my lips hovered over hers, wanting to capture them, to feel them against my own. Her breath caught, forcing my heart into overdrive. “Aria.” I said her name like it was a plea. A plea to save me from the sadness of my life. A plea to let me forget everything else but her in this one moment.

And then my lips were on hers, devouring them like they were the only thing I had left in this life. Like she was the only person who could make me feel this way. She wrapped her arms around my waist and pulled me in closer.

I kissed her with everything I had until she pushed against my shoulders and stepped back, breathing hard.

“Lucas, we can’t.”

I stared at her dazed, blinking. What had I just done? “Aria, I’m—”

“We can’t do that again,” she said, eyes tormented. There was something else there too . . . remorse. “You’re going to marry someone else, and my heart . . .” She trailed off. “My heart belongs to the Lord. When I marry one day, it’ll be to a man who shares my love for Him. I’m sorry if I encouraged this, but we can’t—”

“Got it.” I ran a hand through my wet hair. “I shouldn’t have done it. I lost myself for a second there, but, don’t worry, it won’t happen again.”

And I meant it.

“Please, Lucas. Don’t be upset. I care about you—”

“You don’t have to say anything else. I got caught up in the moment.”

That could never happen again, because if it did, I wasn’t so sure I could pull away from her next time. I just might rebel against my father’s demands and forge a new life for myself.

But that was only a dream, a fantasy. It wasn’t real life.

In real life, I had responsibilities I needed to attend to.

And I couldn’t let something like this get in the way. Thankfully, Sam appeared a few minutes later on the beach in his swim trunks, and we all snorkeled together. His presence was the buffer I needed. 

Later that evening I got a call from Pete Jensen.

“Mr. Armstrong, I wanted to check in with you. I haven’t found Miss Dasher’s brother yet, but I have another lead I plan to follow-up on tomorrow. There’s something else you should know though . . .”

I sensed the hesitation in his voice. Whatever he was about to tell me, it wasn’t good. I headed down the hallway to my bedroom and closed the door. “Go ahead, Pete. What is it?”

“I did some digging in Aria and Chase’s past. It appears your father had some dealings with her family.”

“What? That’s impossible. I would have heard—”

“This was years ago. I believe she was a minor back then, around seventeen years old according to my records. You were still young yourself.”

“What’s going on Pete? Just spit it out.”

“Aria’s father, Charles Dasher, owned an Italian restaurant. Looks like he inherited it from his own father.”

“Yes, I’m aware of that,” I said, goosebumps forming on the back of my neck.

“Your father bought out the restaurant under the pretense that he would be a partner, only he later shut it down and cleared the land to make way for one of his hotels. I know this doesn’t relate to finding Chase, but I thought you should be aware of the connection your families have before I go further.” He hesitated. “I don’t normally give an opinion. You hire me to get information and that’s what I do, but in this case . . .” He paused. “This is the kind of information that could devastate a person. If you care about Aria . . . Miss Dasher . . .  at all, then keep this to yourself because if you tell her, there’s no telling how she’ll respond. If her friendship is important to you—don’t risk it.”

A wave of nausea filled my stomach, and I bent over slightly, feeling as if I might vomit. My father had been behind everything. It wasn’t surprising though the thought made bile rise in the back of my throat.

The dissolution of the restaurant. The stress that led to her father’s heart attack. The responsibility rested on my father’s shoulders and now mine by default. Worse of all, Aria and Chase had been thrust into foster care and were separated from one another as a result of my father’s actions.

This woman who had begun to mean something to me would hate me if she ever found out my family was responsible for her family’s demise.

I could never tell her, but if I didn’t, what kind of man would that make me?

Shaking my head, I groaned. Who was I kidding? It wasn’t as if I could claim to be an honest businessman who cared about people. When had that ever been a priority in my life? I’d made more than a few shady deals like that myself.

I was my father’s son after all.

And he trained me well.

The thought sickened me, and for once, I wished I’d been born into a simple family, one where money wasn’t involved. Where love took precedence over everything else, including the need for power and control.

But God had seen fit to put me right where I was. Maybe this was His idea of a sick joke. The one person who had come to mean something to me was the exact person who would hate me once she knew the part my family played in her suffering.

She would leave, just like everyone else had. They all left. Every. Single. One.

That we had done this to her made me ill. My knees buckled, and I gripped the top of my dresser. I had to make it right somehow.

And I had to tell her. Keeping it from her would only perpetuate the wrong.

I cared about her enough to know I couldn’t do that.

Still, the whole business made me shaky inside. I would tell her but not yet. In a couple of weeks, we’d have to leave and I’d have to hunt down the next woman on my father’s list.

Until then, I just wanted to enjoy the island. Enjoy the last few days I had with Aria. I’d make them the best two weeks of her life.

And then I’d give her the bad news. 

Chapter 19

Aria

After showering, I dressed and prepared to go out for dinner. A week had passed since the debacle with Hillary, and we were all doing our best to put it out of our minds. Lucas seemed content with forgetting about it, but I still felt bad for being in the middle.

I wore a simple yellow sundress and put my hair up in a messy bun. Lucas had invited Sam and me to join him at a beachside restaurant this evening, and, despite the fact that I wanted to go, nervous butterflies rolled around in my stomach like they were doing somersaults just to tick me off.

The more time I spent with Lucas, the more time I wanted with him.

This trip would be coming to a close soon, and I was both relieved and saddened by that knowledge. I felt like a greedy baby grasping for her bottle when she should be eating mashed peas instead. Lucas was all I could think about these days, and it terrified me because our friendship could not go further than it already had.

Boundaries were there to keep us safe. I just needed to make sure neither of us crossed one of those boundaries again.

A permanent ache had developed in my chest, and I knew I should have kept better watch over my feelings for him. If I had, I wouldn’t be in this position, longing for the next moment he walked into the room and started a conversation or invited Sam and me to spend the day with him in some outdoor activity. In the past week, he’d taken us both on a catamaran around the Na Pali Coast, an inner tube ride down a river, and, yesterday, we went zip lining through a beautiful meadow. It had me shaking in my boots, so to speak, but it was a lot of fun. There had been hikes to local waterfalls and luaus and more trips to the ocean.

Ever since last week when Lucas kissed me on the shores of Ke’e Beach, he’d made sure Sam was with us wherever we went like he was our chaperone. And that was a good thing. I think we’d both sensed it was necessary.

Even though I knew I shouldn’t dwell on it, my mind wandered frequently to that day at Ke’e. The way he’d pulled me close and kissed me like there was a drought, and I was the only water he had left. The way I had responded to his kiss and then pushed him away.

I had to be careful when I was around him. It was as if he was a magnet, and I was powerless to resist his pull. But whatever was developing between us—it couldn’t happen.

I finished getting ready by putting on a layer of pink lip gloss and then strode out to the living room where Lucas and Sam were already waiting.

They both stood to their feet, and Sam smiled playfully. “It’s always worth it when a pretty lady makes the men in her life wait. You look lovely.”

“Thank you, Sam.” I smiled and then brought my gaze to Lucas.

He was less playful—almost brooding, moody. His hands were in his pockets, eyes trained on me like he was memorizing everything about me. Intense. Watchful. Even a little frustrated.

“We should go,” he said, expression darkening.

I didn’t care that he hadn’t complimented my appearance. His eyes said all I needed to know. They flickered with want, desire, the same passion I’d seen that day at Ke’e Beach. It was hard to be in the same room when he looked at me like that.

Like I was everything he wanted, and at the same time, everything he despised. Or maybe it was that he despised himself for wanting me.

Whatever it was, it was confusing.

We headed to the car, and Lucas took the front seat with Sam as he’d been prone to do lately. Something was bothering Lucas this evening, but I wasn’t sure what. He seemed more distant, like his thoughts were elsewhere—on something unpleasant.

We ate dinner and talked about Sam’s grandkids. He had a lot of funny stories to share with us about crazy things they’d done. Things like their mother finding them on the floor of the kitchen with flour all over their hands and faces. I laughed so hard at some of the tales my belly hurt, but it was the good kind of belly ache.

Lucas was quiet most of the time, but he was attentive and nodded or made a comment here or there.

Sometimes I felt his eyes on me and my pulse would increase its rhythm.

Sometimes I wondered if there were lasers in those pupils of his, turning my insides to liquid every time he looked at me. 

Sometimes I wondered how much longer I could do this. It was getting harder and harder to deal with.

The thought of going home nearly brought me to tears.

But the thought of staying under his watchful eye and not being able to do anything except keep him at arm’s length, it was almost too painful to bear.

I’d shared with him about the Lord on a few occasions, and he’d been attentive. He’d mostly listened and hadn’t said a word. I didn’t know what was going through his head or what he believed about the gospel and salvation. He’d kept his thoughts to himself, except for the one time he’d told me he was beyond forgiveness. I’d assured him that wasn’t the case, but he didn’t seem to believe me.

All I knew, was that something had to change soon because I couldn’t go on like this much longer.

When dinner was over, we headed out to the car, and Lucas cleared his throat. “Would both of you like to take a walk on the beach? I don’t feel like heading back home yet.”

Sam hesitated. “Actually, I was going to ask if I could do a few errands. I want to purchase souvenirs for my kids and grandkids, but I haven’t had the opportunity. Would that be okay?”

“Sure,” Lucas said. “How much time do you need?”

“An hour. Maybe two.”

My eyes widened. Two hours alone with Lucas? A part of me wanted to signal to Sam that he shouldn’t leave us while the other part couldn’t wait to grab whatever time was given to us.

Lucas glanced at me quickly and turned back to Sam. “Take your time. Aria and I will take a walk on the beach . . . maybe stop at a local hangout to have a drink. Meet us back here in two hours.”

Sam nodded and got in the car. I watched him drive out of the parking lot, my heart picking up speed as I felt Lucas’s eyes on me again.

“Come on.” He tipped his chin towards the water. “There’s something I’d like to talk with you about.”

We both took off our shoes and headed out to the sand. It was still warm from the heat of the day, and it squished between my toes. The rhythmic crashing of the waves was both soothing and invigorating as we walked along the wet part of the beach where the water rolled in. We were close enough to get our feet wet but not so close the water splashed up to our knees.

“I’d like to ask you something,” Lucas said, appearing almost troubled.

“Sure, go ahead.”

“When you were in foster care, were you treated well?” He turned to look at me as if to assess my reaction to his question. “Were your foster parents nice to you?”

I looked away, wondering what had sparked a question like that. “I was never abused if that’s what you’re asking.”

“But were they nice to you?”

“Some were. Others were too busy with work and other commitments to pay much attention.”

“How many homes were you in?”

“Four.”

“That’s a lot of moves.”

“A lot of foster kids get moved way more than that.”

“Why were you moved each time?”

“The first home I went to was with Vera, a single foster mom, and she and I clicked really well. She made me feel at home—like her house was my house. She had two extra bedrooms, but what I didn’t know was that she wanted to adopt a baby. Apparently, she’d taken Chase and me in because the social worker pleaded with her to help out. But as soon as a baby was available, we had to go.”

“Couldn’t you and the baby share the same room?”

I shook my head. “State licensing has rules about that. A teen can’t share the room with a baby unless it’s a mom with her own child. There are exceptions, but the criteria didn’t fit in my situation.” I nibbled on my bottom lip. “The baby could have stayed in Vera’s room, but she felt it would be too hard to deal with an infant and two teens, so she gave notice on us.”

“And that’s when you and Chase were separated?”

I nodded. “Yeah.”

“What about the second home?”

“Why the interest in my background all of a sudden?”

He ran a hand through his hair and appeared to consider. “I just want to know what it was like for you.” He looked pained and I sensed he wasn’t telling me something. “I’m interested in your life.”

His eyes were sincere, concerned. I realized at that moment that I trusted Lucas. Even though he’d said on more than a few occasions that he wasn’t a nice guy, his actions during this trip had proven otherwise. Not that I didn’t take him at his word, but, clearly, there was another side to him. He treated Sam and me more like friends than employees, and he’d always been fair, as Sam had mentioned in the beginning. In fact, he’d never been critical of either one of us. And then there was that last thing that happened a week ago. He’d refused to fire me when Hillary had demanded it. That had cost him. I knew it had.

I never heard him speak of friendships, and I had to wonder how many friends he actually had. It made me sad to think he might not have others he could rely on. I didn’t normally tell people my story, but his questions seemed to be a way of reaching out.

“I had to leave the second home because the foster parents decided fostering wasn’t for them. I didn’t hold it against them—they had some difficult kids at the time.”

“And the third home?”

“They had a teenage son a year older than me who kept making advances towards me—pushed me up against a wall one time and wouldn’t let me go. I was so scared, I nearly peed my pants.” I laughed, but it sounded strained. “I kneed him in the groin and got away. You should have seen . . .” I trailed off when I glanced at Lucas.

An expression of rage had crossed his face, and, for a second, he reminded me of an avenging angel, beautiful and scary all at once, ready to execute justice on anyone who brought pain into my life. “Did he hurt you?” He asked, quietly, just barely above a whisper.

“What?”

“I said, did he ever hurt you?” He was louder this time, his fists opening and closing, emotion rolling off of him in waves. It was similar to his response on the plane when he’d found out I’d been homeless.

He cared.

Maybe a little too much.

“No. He tried it one more time after that, and I poked him in the eyes so hard he started bleeding.” I cleared my throat. “When I told the foster parents, they didn’t believe me. They took his side—said I’d attacked him for no reason. In their eyes, their son could do no wrong, and I was just a manipulative teenage girl who didn’t know how to tell the truth. I told the social worker as well, but the foster parents convinced her I was lying because I liked a boy at another school. They said I wanted to leave their home to be closer to him.”

“That’s crazy.”

“Yeah, they got that from their son, and he made it up.”

Lucas shook his head. “How did you get out of there?”

“At first, my social worker told me I had to work things out with them, but I couldn’t sleep at night knowing their son was in the room across the hall.  I started misbehaving and became so defiant they didn’t want me there any longer.” I cleared my throat. “I was moved to another home, and it turned out to be a stable place for me. I stayed with that family for the rest of my time in foster care, and they helped me prepare for college entrance exams and made me feel welcome in their home. They had three of their own kids, and they were all very sweet. I still keep in touch with them once in a while.” I brought my hands behind my back as we continued walking. “The foster mom’s name was Ann. She had some quirks—she was deathly afraid of flying. I guess that’s where I got my fear from. But she was always kind to me.”

Lucas went from appearing slightly troubled to a full-blown expression of distress.  “Do you ever wonder what it would be like if your father hadn’t died and you weren’t pushed into state care?”

My breath caught in my throat. “All the time. I picture the faces of my dad and brother in my mind’s eye, and I long to see them again—touch their faces and give them a hug. A couple of those foster families were kind to me, but it was never the same as having my father and brother around. If something had happened to me, those parents might have been sad, sure. But they wouldn’t have grieved like I was their child.” I wiped a tear from one eye. “Sometimes I felt like no one really loved me. Some liked me—but love was a completely different thing.”

Lucas reached out and took my hand, folding it into his own, firm and secure. “I know what that’s like.”

My head snapped up. “You do?”

Chapter 20

Aria

Lucas stared out at the ocean, his expression stoic and grim as if he could withstand the weight of the world by holding up a strong front.

“I know my sister loves me,” he said, “but we’ve never confided in each other, and I wouldn’t say we’re friends. My family never expressed affection, never spent time together. Even so, Calista was always loyal to me. She always tried to intercede when my father . . .” He let out a heavy breath and changed the subject. “I’m sorry you’ve had a hard life, Aria. I wish I could’ve prevented those things from happening to you.” He looked troubled again, and I couldn’t shake the feeling that he was still holding something back.

I wanted him to talk about his father because I sensed there was pain there, but I didn’t want to press too much, so I kept my next question general. “Tell me more about your family. Were there ever moments of happiness?”

He flinched. I’d become adept at picking up on body language—it was a survival skill I’d learned while in foster care and also when I’d lived on the streets. Something had happened to Lucas. Something so deep and so painful it was taking everything he had right now to hold it in. His breathing grew labored and his eyes were almost tortured.

“It’s okay,” I said. “If you don’t want to talk about it . . .”

“I think I need to talk about it. I’ve never confided in anyone, but you’re the first person I’ve met who I know will understand.” He swallowed. And then he swallowed again. He stopped walking, and we stood there for a long moment. “My father was physically abusive when I was a kid.” He ducked his head as if ashamed. “He beat me. A lot. It stopped when I grew older and could stand up to him, but the verbal abuse never went away.”

When he looked at me, his jaw was tight. Sharing this wasn’t easy for him. I wanted to reach out to him, but I sensed he just needed me to listen.

“He used to come home late at night after having a few drinks. He’d take out his belt and lash out at me. It was always for little things I’d done like forgetting to put my shoes in my room or not making my bed. I think he looked for excuses to hit me.”

“Lucas, no one should ever have to go through that.”

“I know, but he threatened to hurt me if I told anyone.” He started walking again, and I followed, close to his side. “This one time he threw me against the wall, and I fell and broke my arm. Before he took me to the hospital, he told me that if I said anything, he’d hunt down the doctor I told and kill him.”

I gasped. “Are you serious?”

He nodded. “He had the resources to do it. I understood that even at twelve years old. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if my father has had people killed before. I’m not aware of any plans he made, but he’s cunning and shrewd. He could have easily kept things like that from me.” His lower lip trembled. “I would never do something like that, and you can bet I would never raise a hand to someone weaker than myself, but I’m a lot like him, Aria.”

I stopped walking and tugged on his hand to stop him in his tracks. “Why do you say that? I haven’t met your father, and I know what others have said, but when I look at you, I only see how you’ve treated me.”

He closed his eyes for a second. “In school, I was a bully, and I ostracized plenty of kids. When I grew older, I liked that I had money—knew exactly how to throw around my power to get my way. If anyone crossed me, I made their lives miserable, just like my ol’ man made mine unbearable.” He glanced at me, eyes bleak. “You know, they almost put me in foster care.”

“What happened?”

“When my dad took me to the hospital for the broken arm, the doctor didn’t believe my story. He called CPS.”

“And they didn’t take you?”

He shook his head. “The social worker was about to detain me, but Dad called someone higher up and he took care of it—told the social worker to let it go. Said he would personally handle it, but he never did.” He blew out a breath. “I wasn’t completely honest with you that day we talked about our parents. I mentioned my dad kicked out my mom because she had a drug problem.” He ran a hand through his hair and pressed his lips together. “Truth is, she left on her own volition. When I turned eighteen, I had my investigator find her, and I don’t know what I thought—guess a part of me thought once we found each other, she’d want a relationship with me. But when I called her, it was clear she didn’t.” He continued to stare at the sand as we walked. “It nearly devastated me, Aria, and I almost ended my life. If my own mother couldn’t love me . . .”

Tears sprung to my eyes. “Oh, Lucas, I’m so sorry. The adults in your life failed you. They should have protected you. They should have been there for you.”

He reached over and wiped the tears falling down my face. “Please don’t cry for me. I’m not worth these tears.”

His statement only made me cry more. How could he feel he wasn’t worth it? We’d lived very different lives, and I’d gone through some rough moments in foster care, but at least I had memories of the way my dad loved me, and I’d never doubted his love. I couldn’t imagine growing up in a home where love didn’t exist at all. “Lucas, don’t say that. You are worth it. I’m crying because I care. My tears prove that you are worth it.”

His expression reflected an inner battle, and, for a second, I thought he might turn and walk away. But then he drew me into his arms, and we stood like that for a long while, just holding each other. I felt his tears on my neck, but by the time he pulled back, his face was emotionless and stoic again, and I could tell he was already pushing the feelings back down.

“Let’s talk about something else,” he said. “I didn’t mean for the conversation to get this heavy.”

I put my hand on his arm. “I want you to know that I’m here for you if you ever want to talk about it again.”

He inhaled a shaky breath, and his chest rose with the motion. “Thanks.” He nodded in the direction of an outdoor beach restaurant at the border of the street and the sand. “You want to step in and get a drink?”

“Sure.”

Lucas kept a fair bit of distance from me as we walked towards the restaurant. I felt this tug to reach out to him and touch him—to try to ease the sadness that rolled off him, but I knew only God could heal that broken part of him. As much as I longed to be there for him, I had to pull back a little as well, or my heart would become so entangled, I wouldn’t know how to extricate myself.

As we neared the restaurant, I noticed a sign that said: The Beach Cabana Club, and it looked like an enormous hut with tiki torches and live music. It had an indoor-outdoor feel as the front wall where customers entered was basically non-existent. The music grew louder the closer we got, and a bunch of people danced and mingled near the center where a bar had been set up. I’d never been one to get involved in the bar scene, and I decided I wouldn’t have any alcohol.

A hostess seated us, and we both ordered drinks: a Shirley Temple with extra cherries for me and an ice tea for Lucas. I was surprised Lucas didn’t get something with alcohol, but I remembered him saying his father used to drink before beating him, so it made sense that he abstained. We watched the sunset for a while and didn’t say much. We’d already spilled our guts, and it was nice to sit quietly and not feel the need to talk. It felt comfortable—not awkward at all.

I found myself looking at the people dancing in the center of the restaurant, and it seemed like they were having a good time. This one couple was really goofy, and they kept pulling a lot of dorky eighties moves. I put a hand over my mouth to contain my laughter.

Lucas still appeared lost in thought, like something was bothering him, but I felt his eyes on me while I watched the couple.

He smiled faintly. “Want to dance?”

My jaw dropped open. “You dance?” I hadn’t expected that. He seemed so reserved at times, I couldn’t picture it.

He shrugged. “A little. What about you?”

I loved dancing, but it was something I usually did in the confines of my own room. Maybe I was a bit sheltered in some ways because of the strict rules in foster care, but I had never danced in front of others. Still, I wasn’t self-conscious about it, and the music beckoned to me. “Yeah, let’s do it.”

Lucas took my hand, and we walked out to the dance floor, already moving to the beat. The song, Don’t Worry, Be Happy was playing, and it was so uplifting, both of us couldn’t help but relax and enjoy the moment.

Women stared at Lucas as we joined the scene, and I had to hide a smile because it was obvious he was being ogled by half the restaurant, but he didn’t seem to notice or even care.

He was a much better dancer than he’d let on, and if I had known ahead of time how good he was, I might have declined and stayed in my seat. I looked like an idiot next to him. He had rhythm and moved to the music like it was second nature. Me, on the other hand? I was a bit like that goofy couple doing eighties moves. Not that I did eighties moves, but my dancing was hardly anything to brag about. Still, it was all about having fun, so I didn’t allow my inner critic to surface, and I let loose and was just myself.

At one point, Lucas twirled me around and around, and I was so lost in our laughter and the spinning room and the carefree environment that I never wanted it to end. When the song concluded, a slow one took its place.

For a second, we both stood there, unsure if we should go back to our seats or continue dancing. Lucas made that decision for the both of us by tugging me in closer. I put one hand on his shoulder, and he took my other hand in his. His eyes bored into mine for a fleeting moment, but it was enough to send chills down my spine and a shot of adrenaline surged straight to my stomach. Speaking of my stomach, the butterflies did a few of their own dance moves as if to let me know they were still alive and kicking. 

We’d hugged earlier, so it wasn’t as if we hadn’t been this close before, but the music, the mood, it started doing things to me. A longing to be closer to him, to hold a special place in his life swept over me.

Being only friends didn’t feel enough anymore.

The realization sent a panicky sensation through my chest, and my breath shuddered. A lightheaded sensation came over me. Maybe it was from spinning and twirling earlier, or maybe my emotions were getting the best of me. We were only halfway through the song, and I had to get away. I couldn’t do this anymore.

It felt as though my feelings would envelop me, consume me in a flame of fire until there was nothing left but ash. I pulled back. “I . . . I have to use the restroom.”

One corner of his mouth edged up. “Now?”

“Yes. Now.”

He snickered. “You better hurry up then.”

I took off in the direction of the restrooms, my heart pounding so hard it hurt. Once I was in the bathroom, I splashed water on my face, and then went into a stall and sat down. I ducked my head between my legs so the blood would flow back and the dizziness would go away.

Lord, help me. I don’t want to cross the line. Maybe I already have, but I don’t want to do anything that will dishonor You. Help me to go back out there and be the friend that Lucas needs and not focus on my own feelings. Help him to turn to You for salvation. Heal his heart and show him Your love.

I walked out of the restroom feeling calmer and more at peace. Allowing my emotions to go wild probably hadn’t been the best idea, but it happened, so now it was time to reign myself in and maintain control.

A man in a black tank top approached me. “Excuse me, do you have the time?” His head was shaved on both sides with thick hair going down the middle—basically, a mohawk hairstyle that didn’t stick straight up.

“I’m sorry, I don’t.”

He put a hand at his chin. “Do I know you?”

“No, we’ve never met.”

“I thought I saw you at the zip line tour.”

“Oh, maybe we were at the same one, but I don’t remember seeing you.”

He shook his head slowly as if considering. “I’m pretty sure I saw you. Your long black hair stands out.” He smiled and shoved his hands in his pockets. “It’s gorgeous by the way.”

“Thank you.” I started to leave, but he placed a hand on my arm.

“You are one gorgeous lady. Are you here with anyone?”

He was starting to make me uncomfortable. “I’m here with my friend. I should probably get back to him.”

“Oh, he’s just a friend?”

It felt like a trick question, and if the answer was “yes” then he would never go away. “It was nice chatting with you, but I have to go.”

I started to leave again, but this time he grabbed my wrist and wouldn’t release it. “Have a drink with me, sweetness.” He grinned, and I couldn’t help but notice how yellow his teeth were. That explained the stale breath assaulting my nose.

“No, thank you. Please let me pass.”

The humor disappeared from his eyes. “Not until you and I have a drink.”

Chapter 21

Lucas

Aria left in the middle of the song.

She’d given some excuse about needing to use the restroom, but I knew it was more than that. There was a connection between us, and it was growing stronger and stronger each day. She knew what my intentions were—I had to marry to keep my inheritance. 

She’d also made it clear she couldn’t be with me.

But dancing close like that—it felt like we were meant to be together. Like everything we’d experienced led up to this very moment. A moment that seemed so real—so evident. At least to me.

I couldn’t lie to myself anymore. With each passing day, I was falling for her a little more. I’d known from the first day we arrived in Kauai I needed to keep my distance, yet I hadn’t been able to do it.

This was bad—it wouldn’t end well for either of us.

Maybe I should cut the trip short. Another week of this would be unbearable. I already felt like I didn’t want to let her go, and it was only going to make what I had to do harder. There was no question I had to do it. If I didn’t abide by my father’s wishes, I’d lose everything.

But how was I supposed to court the next woman when my heart had slowly been given over to Aria piece-by-piece?

I headed over to our table to wait for her, and after a few minutes, I noticed her standing by the restroom door, talking to some guy. The predatory look on his face made the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

He put a hand on her arm, and she said something to him and tried to walk by, but then he grabbed her wrist and held her there.

Without thinking, I stood out of my chair so fast it scuffed on the ground and hit the empty table behind. I didn’t bother to look back but strode towards Aria. I didn’t know what I planned on doing, but if I had to fight the guy, I’d do it. He needed to take his hands off her.

Just as I reached them he said, “Come on, baby, give me a chance.”

I put my arm around Aria’s shoulders and glared at him. “That’s my girlfriend you’re calling baby.”

Aria looked surprised, but she didn’t say anything.

“Remove your hands,” I said. “Now.”

He released his grip on her wrist and held both hands in the air. “Sorry, man. She said she was here with a friend. Thought she was fair game.”

“She’s not. She belongs to me.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice.” Like a snake, he slithered off to the next woman on the other side of the room. What a slime-ball.

Once he left, I didn’t remove my arm. Claiming her like that made me want to touch her more. I contemplated backing her against the wall and kissing her until she pushed me away again, but I restrained myself because I’d be no better than that guy, and Aria deserved to be treated with more respect. It wouldn’t help anything, and, ultimately, I didn’t want to hurt her.

Maybe I already had.

It was what I did. I hurt people.

I exhaled and lifted my arm from around her. “Are you okay?”

She nodded. “Why did you tell him I was your girlfriend?”

“Because he needed to take his paws off you. I didn’t like it.”

“But I don’t belong to you. You lied—”

“What did you want me to do? I thought I just saved you from that creep.”

Her eyes teared up. “You did. I don’t mean to sound ungrateful. But hearing you say I belonged to you . . . Lucas this is too much. I can’t go on like this.”

She ran out of the restaurant, and I let her go. It felt as though she took my heart with her, and I was left with a hollow cavity in my chest.

I’d warned her about me, but she’d wanted to believe the best. It was time to tell her the truth and stop going through the motions like everything would be okay.

Everything would not be okay.

I would marry someone I didn’t love, and Aria would go back to L.A. and forget all about me.

That was how this would end. To think differently would be a disservice to both of us.

I left the restaurant and found her a few paces away from the entrance, standing with her arms wrapped around her waist. She was staring out at the water, a wistful expression on her face.

“There’s something I need to tell you.”

She didn’t look at me, but she knew I was there. “What is it?”

“Why don’t we walk back to the parking lot where we promised to meet Sam.”

She followed me, and my heart sped up as I contemplated what to say. There was no nice way to tell her what my father’s actions had done to her family, so I said nothing and kept my hands in my pockets as we walked along the beach.

She finally stopped walking. “Just tell me. What’s going on?”

I bit down on my bottom lip and stared at the sand. “The man who shut your father’s restaurant down—he was my father.”

Silence.

She stared at me with a stunned expression like she couldn’t believe what I’d said. The blood drained from her face, and her eyes blinked rapidly as if I’d just slapped her.

I swallowed. “I didn’t want to tell you, but you deserve to know the truth.”

“How long have you known?” Her voice sounded strangled like someone had wrapped their fingers around her throat, and she was gasping for breath. “How could you keep this from me?” Tears slid down her face so quickly they dripped on her neck.

“I found out a week ago. Pete Jensen uncovered the details when he was looking into Chase’s past for clues of his whereabouts. I wanted to tell you then, but I couldn’t bring myself to say the words. I was afraid.”

“You told me you weren’t afraid of anything.”

“Looks like you just discovered my one weakness.”

“What’s that?”

I sighed. “You.”

Her face crumbled, and she put a hand over it, ducking her head. A sob escaped from her throat, and her shoulders shook the slightest bit.

“Aria, I’m so sorry.” I reached to give her a hug, but she pushed me away.

“I can’t Lucas. Give me time to process this.” She took a deep breath and calmed herself, but she still wouldn’t look at me.

I nodded. “All right, I understand.”

We walked back to the parking lot in silence, and I was relieved to see Sam had already arrived. If we’d had to wait for him, it would have been awkward and uncomfortable.

On the drive back home, all I could think about was the way her face had fallen and the tears that wet her cheeks. I’d done that to her. Somehow, I had to make it right.

***

The next morning, I sat at the kitchen island and ate cereal for breakfast. Aria was in another room vacuuming since she’d taken the cleaning job back after everything with Hillary blew up. I thought about how I’d attempted to speak with her the previous evening, and she’d told me she needed more time before she was ready to talk. I understood. I guess I hadn’t expected anything different, but it still stung.

I took a walk outside, and when I returned, Aria was vacuuming in the living room. She turned the vacuum off. “Lucas, can we talk for a minute?”

“Sure.”

She gestured for me to take a seat, and we both sat down on the couch. Pain was etched all over her face, and her eyes were red-rimmed from crying. Seeing her like this weighed on me. I wanted to be angry with my father, but instead, I just felt angry with myself for not telling her sooner.

“Aria, I . . .” I stumbled over my words, wanting to say more, but I wasn’t sure how to convey how sorry I was. Words didn’t seem adequate, and as much as I planned to do everything in my power to make things right, I could never take back what had already been done. I could never undo the damage.

“I’ve had time to think,” she said, looking down at her hands. “You completely took me off guard when you spoke with me yesterday. I thought I’d dealt with my feelings over the loss of my father and what happened with the restaurant. I thought I’d moved on. But when you told me your father was behind everything . . .” She met my gaze, eyes watery. “It crushed me. But Lucas, it wasn’t your fault, and I don’t hold you responsible.”

My shoulders sagged, and I let out a breath. Did I feel relief she wasn’t holding it against me?

No.

Her forgiveness was too freely given, and I didn’t deserve that.

“Don’t let me off the hook so easily. My family hurt yours—”

“Were you personally involved? Did you know what your father was doing at the time?”

I shook my head. “No. I wasn’t privy to that information.”

“Then why would I hold you responsible for something you didn’t do?”

My jaw went rigid. “Because I share his DNA. Maybe I wasn’t there to execute the deal, but it could have been me, had I been older. I’m not innocent. Don’t pretend that I am.”

“None of us are innocent, Lucas. The Bible says that we’ve all sinned, but Jesus offers forgiveness to those who believe in Him.”

“I’m not sure what He has to do with this conversation.”

“He has everything to do with this conversation. He’s the reason I can forgive what happened to my family. None of it happened outside of His notice, and He’s been with me every step of the way, guiding me, protecting me.” Tears slid down her cheeks, but she didn’t move to wipe them away. “My father is gone, and I will miss him until the day I die, but I know he would want me to show Christ’s love and forgiveness to others. That was the kind of man he was.”

“You have a remarkable faith. I wish I had what you have.”

She reached over to touch my arm. “You can, Lucas.”

I shook my head. “I don’t know.” My phone rang, and I saw it was from Pete Jensen. “I have to take this. It could be about your brother.” I hit the answer button and held the phone to my ear. “Pete, what’s up?”

“Mr. Armstrong, I have good news. I found Aria’s brother.”

My heart soared until I realized I didn’t know exactly what he’d found. I considered taking the call in the other room, but keeping the information to myself wouldn’t be fair to Aria. If it had been Calista who had gone missing, I’d want to know the second information was available. “Hold on, Pete. Aria’s with me right now, so I’m going to put you on speaker.”

Aria’s eyes widened. “Did he find something?”

I nodded and slid closer to her so we could both hear. “Go ahead, Pete.”

“Hi, Aria,” Pete said. “I have some good news for you.”

She gasped. “You found him?” Her eyes lit up with joy, and she pressed her lips together as if trying to hold back more tears.

“Yes, he’s in a drug rehab facility in Los Angeles, and he’s supposed to get out in a few days.”

“Drugs?” Her face went pale. “Is he okay?”

“As far as I know. I wasn’t able to talk to him, but I have a contact who works in the Department of Mental Health, and she refers clients to rehab. She helped me locate him in the system as a favor. Obviously, due to HIPPA laws, I don’t know the details of his case or what kind of drugs he was on, but I do have the number of his therapist if you’d like to speak with her.”

“Yes, l need that number,” she said, voice rising. “I want to call her right away.”

I went in search of a notepad and brought it back. “Go ahead, Pete.”

He shared the number, and we wrote it down. Aria beamed, and her face lit with so much joy my heart expanded. The urge to pull her into another hug was so strong it took everything in me to resist.

I had to stop doing that . . . pulling her close . . . hugging her. Her reaction yesterday when I’d referred to her as my girlfriend and put my arm around her, claiming her as mine . . . It was clear she had feelings for me too. It wouldn’t be right to encourage that when nothing could come of it.

We said goodbye to Pete, and Aria called the therapist. She learned that Chase had been trying to locate her as well. The therapist, Camille Watson, hadn’t shared much. She stated she was bound by confidentiality, but she took Aria’s cell number and promised to let Chase know she’d reached out.

After the call, Aria stood, appearing elated and happier than I’d ever seen her before. “I can’t believe it. I’ve been searching for so long.” She glanced at me, and I stood as well. “Lucas, I was so worried he was . . .” Her lip trembled. “I thought he might be . . .”

“You weren’t sure if he was still alive.”

She nodded. “I have you to thank for this.” She flew at me, wrapping her arms around my waist. Her head settled against my chest, and it felt good to have her so close, but it was wrong. “Thank you so much for helping me,” she said. “I’ll never forget your kindness.”

I didn’t push her away, but I didn’t put my arms around her either. At some point, whatever this was between us, it had to end. Instead, I patted her back a couple times and cleared my throat. “I’m glad we found him. That’s all that matters.” My voice was hoarse, gruff.

She must have sensed my hesitancy because she pulled away, eyes large. “I’m sorry. I kind of attacked you just now.”

Despite my stoic mood, I smiled faintly. “I’d like to say do it anytime you want, but it’s not a good idea. We should probably talk.”

Her face sobered, and she nodded, looking down at the floor. “Yeah, you’re right.”

“I’m going to be completely upfront with you right now.” My throat constricted, and I had to swallow to get the words out. “It would be easy to pretend nothing happened between us, but I don’t want you to wonder if it was all in your head.” I reached out to touch her arm and then pulled back. “I have feelings for you. You’ve come to mean something to me.” I looked away. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, but neither of us have the freedom to pursue a relationship. It’s probably best that from here on out we keep a professional distance.”

Her eyes were sad, and the energy and elation I’d seen moments earlier faded. “Thank you for being honest,” she said quietly, glancing down. “I want you to know that I have feelings for you too. I’ve been drawn to you from the beginning.”

My first inclination was to reach out and caress her face, but I pulled back. I had to stop doing that. It had become a reflex, but it needed to stop. “I never meant to hurt you.”

“I know. You’ve been upfront about your intentions from the beginning. I should have kept a better handle on my feelings.”

“No, it’s my fault. I couldn’t stay away from you. The blame falls squarely on my shoulders.”

“Lucas.” Her eyes filled with tears.

“I won’t ever forget you, Aria, but you’ll find someone else, someone who deserves you.” I did my best to smile. “Maybe even that friend that texted you a while back. What did you say his name was?”

The blood drained from her face. “Mason. Yeah, we’re supposed to go on a date when I get back.”

I nodded, feeling like I was being ripped apart from the inside. “You should give him a chance. I want you to be happy.”

“I don’t know,” she said. “My feelings for him aren’t—”

“Promise me you’ll try. Please. I want you to be able to move on.”

She nodded reluctantly. “Okay. I’ll try.” She put a hand at her throat. “When we get to L.A., I plan on looking for another job. I’m grateful for everything you’ve done for me, but we can’t be around each other anymore.” 

My heart slammed into my throat. She was leaving? For good? Of course, she was. How could I think she’d want to hang around and watch me pursue the next woman? And, if I had to witness her go on that date with Mason . . . No, it was for the best that she find another job. My brow pulled, and I let out a long sigh. “That’s wise. I’ll do everything I can to make sure you and Chase are taken care of.”

“You don’t have to do that. You’ve already done more than enough.”

I put a hand up to stop her. “Yes, I do. I won’t be able to rest if I know you’re struggling. Let me do this for you, Aria.”

“I don’t want you to feel like you owe me anything.”

Her words were like a knife to my gut. I owed her a debt I could never pay back. The humility, the forgiveness in her voice . . . It nearly killed me. “Let me take care of you and your brother. I’m asking you for this one thing. Please.” I stared at her intently, letting her know by my expression that it was important to me.

“Fine. Just don’t go overboard.”

“Great. Now that we’ve settled that, I have some errands to do.” I had to get out of the house. Standing with her like this was slowly eating me up inside. “I’ll see you later.”

I grabbed the keys to my car and took off, every muscle in my body straining from the stress of this entire situation. I was doing the right thing.

This was the right thing.

It was.

I knew it was.

Then why did I feel like I was making the biggest mistake of my life?

Chapter 22

Aria

Lucas and I walked through the lobby of the cement structure, and my heart rate increased. In just a few short minutes I would see my brother’s face—finally.

It felt like a dream. If I didn’t hold on to it tightly enough, I might wake up in my old studio apartment and find that none of this was real, and it had all been a figment of my imagination.

A receptionist glanced up from her desk and greeted us. “May I help you?”

“Yes, we’re here to pick up Chase Dasher. He’s discharging today.”

She nodded. “Please have a seat. He’ll be out in a few minutes.”

Lucas and I sat on a stiff tan couch that seemed like it must have been county issued because it lacked any amount of comfort whatsoever.

I stared at the wall as if in a daze. So much had occurred, my head was still buzzing from all the changes. My brother returned my call the same day I’d spoken to his therapist, and he’d told me he was discharging in a week. We’d arranged for me to pick him up today. He didn’t have anywhere to go, but I’d assured him he could live with me. I’d wanted him to tell me everything, but he’d held back. Said he’d rather talk about it in person. I was anxious to know what happened to him, but I respected his desire to share when he was ready.

The day after our phone conversation, I’d considered buying a plane ticket and flying home right away so I could see Chase, but I would need that money for both of us. He was out of work, and from what I gathered, he didn’t have much.

The last few days in Kauai had been torturous. Lucas spent most of the time shut up in his room making phone calls and dealing with business stuff. Not only had I felt antsy to see Chase again, but my heart broke every time I saw Lucas and knew each day would be one of our last together.

We both understood it was best to part ways, but it didn’t make it any easier because my feelings for him had grown. It was like a part of me had been damaged and would never heal. Once he brought Chase and me back to my studio apartment, he would fly to Boston where the next woman on his list lived. Just thinking about it made my breath catch, like the oxygen in the room was slowly dissipating.

Remember the rain.

Warmth flooded through me as the image of God’s protection and unending love came to mind. On that fateful night, I’d hid behind that dumpster with the rain pouring down on me. I could have so easily been harmed, but the Lord was with me then, and He’d be with me now. I wouldn’t stop believing that even though my heart was in tatters.

A door on the other side of the reception desk opened, and a woman stood there, talking to someone in low tones. I could only see the back of her brown hair, but her voice filtered over. “Make sure you attend the support group I referred you to. It’s vital to your ongoing treatment that you follow through. I’ll look for you next week for outpatient therapy. I’m so proud of you, Chase. You’ve come a long way.”

I stood, my heart crashing so hard in my chest I could hear it in my ears. Five years ago, my father passed away, and it had been four long years since I’d seen my little brother. Four years of searching, not knowing if he was dead or alive. What would he look like? Would he be the same Chase I once knew?

I twisted my hands in front of me, waiting. The woman stepped to the side and Chase walked through the door. He looked skinny—too skinny—and he was much taller than he’d been the last time I’d seen him. His black, shiny hair was a little longer, curling around his neck, but his eyes were still the same vibrant blue I remembered.

“Aria,” he said, grinning.

I flew at him, grabbing hold of him in a tight hug. All the years of looking for him caught up to me, and I lost it. “Chase . . . Chase . . . My baby brother. I can’t believe this.” Tears rushed from my eyes, and I couldn’t seem to get out a coherent sentence after that, but I didn’t care if I looked like a blabbering idiot. I was just so happy to see him.

Chase was never one to show his emotions, but he teared up. “I wasn’t sure if I’d ever see you again.” His voice was hoarse, and he kept swiping at his eyes. “Running away was a mistake. I’m so sorry for everything I put you through. I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”

“We can talk about all that when we get home. Right now, I just want to celebrate that I finally found you.”

“You look exactly the same,” he said with a lopsided smile. “Still short and scrawny.”

I threw my head back and laughed. “I’m not that short, and I’m a lot tougher now. I could probably kick your butt if I had to.”

It was his turn to laugh. “Now that I’d like to see.” His eyes strayed behind me, and when I turned to look, Lucas had stood and was walking towards us.

He offered his hand. “I’m Lucas Armstrong, Aria’s employer. It’s nice to meet you.”

Chase shook his hand. “Aria told me over the phone what you did for us. I owe you everything for bringing my sister to me.”

Instead of seeming proud for his part in helping us, Lucas seemed almost miserable. His face was drawn and tired, and his eyes flickered with sadness and something else . . . guilt. “I’m the one who owes you.”

Chase cocked his head to the side, confusion showing in his expression. There was a lot I would need to fill him in on but now wasn’t the time.

“I know you two have a lot of catching up to do,” Lucas said, “and I don’t want to get in the middle of that. How about if I take you home?”

My insides twisted from that statement. This would be it. We’d part ways, and I would probably never see him again. My body felt like it was being stretched in two different directions, as if a part of me celebrated and was at peace from finally seeing my brother again, and the other part mourned the loss of someone who had become dear to me. The happiness and the pain were a messy ball of emotion I didn’t know how to handle. One second I wanted to cry from happiness, and the next I wanted to curl up in a ball and hide.

I nodded, putting an arm around Chase as we followed Lucas to the car. Chase probably hated the extra affection, but I wasn’t letting go—not yet.

We got in the vehicle and Sam pulled away from the curb. Chase and I sat in the back, and Lucas sat up front with Sam. My brother and I chatted like we had when we were young kids, and we both had so much to say, I didn’t realize we weren’t headed to my apartment until Sam drove up to a restaurant. The exterior was covered in brick, and the doors were bright red.

“Are we stopping for lunch?” I asked. “It’s a little early for that. It’s probably not even open.”

Lucas glanced at me over his shoulder with a veiled expression. “We’re just going to stop for a few minutes. Come on inside. There’s someone I want you to meet.”

I shrugged. “All right.”

Lucas, Chase, and I slid out of the car and walked inside while Sam parked the car. My eyes scanned the room. An elaborate chandelier hung from the ceiling, and booths formed the outer rim of the restaurant. Tables with white tablecloths were scattered throughout the center of the room, and wall lamps kept the lighting dim enough to create an enjoyable ambiance. The décor was simple but classy. The restaurant was empty, which further solidified my thoughts that we were too early for lunch.

“This place looks upscale,” Chase said.

A stocky man with graying hair and a black mustache walked over to greet us. “You must be Mr. Armstrong.”

“I am.” Lucas stepped forward to shake his hand. “And this is Aria and Chase.”

“My name is Emilio,” he said. “Welcome.”

“Thank you,” I said. Both Chase and I shook his hand, and I couldn’t help but smile at him. He had a friendly way about him that set me right at ease.

“I hear you both grew up with an Italian restaurant in the family,” Emilio said.

“We did.” How did he know that? Lucas didn’t even seem to know him that well. What was going on?

“I used to help out in the kitchen,” Chase said. “And Aria played her violin for the customers.”

“She knows how to make a really good pizza,” Lucas said.

Chase grinned. “You haven’t tasted mine yet. It’ll knock hers out of the park.”

“He’s not kidding,” I said. “His is so much better. He was always better at cooking.”

Lucas’s eyes were trained on me. “I don’t know. That barbecue chicken pizza you made was amazing. I can’t imagine anything better.” His eyes lingered on my face a bit longer, and then he looked away as if it pained him to remember.

“I hope you like the place,” Emilio said. “But if there’s something you don’t like, we’ll fix it.”

My head jerked back in surprise. “Why would we ask you to fix anything?”

He looked confused and glanced at Lucas. “You haven’t told her yet?”

Lucas flushed and ran a hand along the back of his head. “No, I . . . I haven’t had a chance.”

“Would you like me to do the honors then?” Emilio asked.

Lucas nodded. “Please.”

Emilio held his arms out wide. “Without further ado, welcome to Emilio’s. This place has been my life for thirty years, but now I’m handing it over to you so I can retire and travel to Italy.”

I stood there, stunned, not able to say a single word.

“Did I miss something?” Chase asked. “Did he just say he’s giving this place to us?”

“That’s what the man said,” Lucas answered. “I’ve been busy this week. I had my people look for restaurants that were up for sale, and Emilio’s rose to the top of our choices. He’s been holding out for the right person to buy, and when I told him your story, he knew you two were the ones he wanted to take over.”

My mouth fell open. “Lucas . . . I can’t believe you . . . Wow.” I laughed, looking around at everything. “This place is amazing. You shouldn’t have—”

“I know this isn’t your father’s restaurant,” Lucas said, “but let me do this for you. Let me do what should have been done a long time ago.”

The waterworks began again, and I wiped away a tear, wondering if this would be the last time today but knowing it wouldn’t. “You didn’t have to do this. It’s too much.”

“No,” he said. “You and Chase deserve to be here. I want to come back one day and eat one of Chase’s infamous pizzas and listen to you play your violin.” He smiled mischievously. “Not the loud, hyper song you played that one time. You can play the soft melody I heard you play outside.”

Heartache burned my throat, and I couldn’t speak, but I still tried to smile because I knew he wanted to make me happy.

“Somebody clue me in, please,” Chase said, sounding completely confused. “Why are you giving us this restaurant?”

“I’ll fill you in later,” I said, nudging him in the ribs. “It’s a long story.”

Chase gave me a look like he wanted answers now, but I gave him one right back indicating he’d have to wait.

“If you say so,” he finally said, giving me a skeptical expression, glancing between Lucas and me as if one of us held the answer.

“Emilio wants to retire,” Lucas said, “but he’s agreed to stay on as long as you need. He’ll train both of you, and his staff will remain, including the chef.”

“Mr. Armstrong is a very generous man,” Emilio said. “Not only did he pay me top dollar for the restaurant, he offered me a salary to train you. He’s even going to send me to Italy to see relatives once you feel comfortable running the place on your own.”

Lucas glanced away, looking embarrassed. “I’m a businessman, and I paid what this place is worth. That’s all.”

Emilio took us on a tour, and the entire time, my heart felt like it would burst. Memories of working in the restaurant with my father surfaced, and I found myself feeling sentimental. I wanted to laugh and cry all at once. That messy ball of emotion was back, forcing me in all different directions. As Emilio showed us new aspects of the restaurant, I had to stop and thank the Lord for all He’d done, but my prayers turned pleading as well. I didn’t know how I was going to say goodbye to Lucas, and I just kept asking God to help me deal with the inevitable loss I was about to feel.

“I’ll expect to see you later this week,” Emilio said, glancing at both Chase and me. “I can’t wait to start training you and getting to know your strengths.”

We thanked him and walked back to the car. I glanced at Lucas. “I still can’t believe you did that.”

“Do you like it?” he asked, seeming concerned.

“Are you kidding me? I love it. The place is amazing. I can’t tell you how grateful I am, Lucas. You didn’t have to do it, but I’m so thankful you did.”

His shoulders relaxed. “I’m glad you like it.”

As Chase walked on ahead of us, I lowered my voice. “I’d give you another hug, but that’s probably not a good idea.” I said it with a lighthearted grin, trying to joke around and keep the mood light. I knew there would be a goodbye soon, but I wasn’t prepared to deal with it. 

“No, you’re right. That’s not a good idea.” He swallowed, not looking amused at all. “Because if I take you in my arms, I might not let you go, and then I’d have some explaining to do with your brother.”

“When you say things like that—”

He reached forward and swiped a thumb across my cheek. “Let’s not say anything else. We both know how hard this is.”

I nodded. He was right. I was only making it more difficult with my comments about hugging him. What was wrong with me?

We got back in the car, and Sam headed out. Chase and I discussed the restaurant in quiet tones in the back while Sam and Lucas carried on a conversation up front. We hadn’t been driving long when Sam suddenly made a turn into a neighborhood I didn’t recognize, and he parked in front of a large blue Victorian house, trimmed in crisp white.

“Where are we?” I asked, leaning across Chase to look out the window on his side.

“This is your new home,” Lucas said, getting out of the car.

Chase and I looked at each other with wide eyes. “He didn’t,” I said.

“All right, you need to start explaining,” Chase said.

“He’s doing this out of a sense of obligation. I’ll share more later.” I took his hand. “Just trust me on this, okay?”

He nodded, and we both got out of the vehicle, joining Lucas and Sam on the front porch. Sam was grinning from ear-to-ear, while Lucas continued to hold that reserved expression he’d had since we’d left the restaurant.

“What’s going on?” I asked.

Lucas put a set of keys in my hand. “It’s yours now.”

My eyes teared up . . . again. Being this emotional, one would think it was that time of the month, but I couldn’t blame hormones this time. “You don’t have to do this. I know you feel bad about what happened but—”

“It’s already been done. It belongs to you now.”

“But don’t houses have to go through escrow?”

“This house has been empty for a while. The owner agreed to let you rent in the meantime, but I took care of what’s owed.”

“Lucas, we can’t accept this. You’ve done too much. I don’t want you to feel obligated—”

“Yes, you can accept it. You promised to let me take care of you, and I expect you to keep that promise.”

“I pictured you giving me a loan for this month’s rent, not buying me a house and a restaurant.”

“It’s what I want to do,” he said. “Please don’t get in the way of that.”

“I told you not to go overboard.” I gestured to the house. “This is the definition of going overboard.”

He laughed. “Hardly. This is nothing.” He nodded towards the doorway. “Come on. Check it out.”

We followed him, and he showed me which key to use to unlock the door. The inside was spacious and homey with lots of windows, and it was decked out with furniture, looking like it belonged on the cover of a magazine. A decorator had definitely been there taking care of the details. After touring the home, we walked out back. There was a huge lawn with green grass, several trees, and a rose garden on one side. A detached garage was located to the left, and the door was up, revealing a bright red Volkswagen Beetle. My hands flew to my mouth. He’d remembered our conversation when I’d said I wanted a red bug one day.

“You’ve got the key to the car in your hands,” Lucas said, stepping over. He took my hand in his own and lifted the key. “It’s this one.”

My heart rate picked up at his touch, and when our eyes met, that connection between us sparked. For a moment, I couldn’t breathe. I could only stare at him with a wistful expression. Pulling myself together, I stepped back, needing some space. “I’m blown away by your generosity, Lucas, but you shouldn’t have done this. You don’t owe us anything.”

He reached forward and smoothed a lock of hair behind my ear. “It’s not enough.”

“We’ll be fine in my apartment. Give this to someone who really needs it.”

Chase cleared his throat. “Um, I think we need it, Aria. Stop trying to convince the man to give it away.”

I glared at him. “No, we don’t need it.”

Lucas smiled for the first time since we’d gotten there. “Stop being so stubborn and listen to your brother.”

The look on my face must have shown my hesitancy because he took my hand in his own and whispered close to my ear, “Do it for me. Please.”

His eyes were filled with sorrow, and I knew if I didn’t accept his gifts, he would continue to feel guilt over what his father did.

“Okay, we’ll accept. Thank you, Lucas. Thank you for all you’ve done for me. You provided a job when I needed it most, and you’ve been so kind to me, I don’t know how to thank you.”

I hadn’t intended on hugging him, but it just sort of happened. It was a reflex, the only way I knew to convey what his generosity meant to me. We stood like that for a long moment, holding each other, not wanting to let go. Sam engaged my brother in conversation, and I was thankful for that. It was awkward enough saying goodbye in front of the others.

Lucas pulled away and then at the last moment, brushed his lips against my temple. “Goodbye, Aria. I . . .” He closed his eyes for a second. “I want you to be happy. Don’t forget, you promised to go on that date with Mason.”

I smoothed out my expression, trying to be strong. It was too hard to speak, so I just nodded.

Lucas turned to Sam. “We need to go.” The two of them walked through the front of the house to the car out front, but I couldn’t follow. I couldn’t watch him drive away. It seemed too final.

It felt like a piece of my heart was walking away, and I would never get it back.

Chapter 23

Aria

The restaurant was filled with wall-to-wall customers, and a large number waited in the front lobby as well. It was a Friday night, and I had already put in a full day’s work since I’d come in early to be trained by Emilio. My brother was back in the kitchen assisting the chef, and I was walking around, talking to the customers like my dad used to do.

Emilio had a similar style, and I liked that his friendly manner filtered down to his staff. He reminded me of my dad in some ways. Since I once was a waitress, I understood how easy it was for employee morale to drop, but from everything I’d seen so far, the staff seemed happy, and the work environment appeared to be such that everyone felt respected. I vowed to keep it that way because I knew how awful it was when management played favorites.

Emilio had been working with Chase and me on the managerial side of things, and because he was such a good teacher, we were starting to get into a daily groove. I quickly learned that I had to be at the top of my game to manage this restaurant. It was a lot of work, but it was also a lot of fun.

And I was thankful. So thankful. In my wildest dreams, I hadn’t expected to have a second chance at something like this. I imagined my father was smiling down on us from heaven, and sometimes I heard his voice. Not his actual voice. But what he would have said in a particular situation.

Aria, be accountable for your mistakes. Never be afraid to apologize. 

A happy customer is a repeat customer.

I can and I will.

And my personal favorite: You get what you work for, not what you wish for.

Each night, I got out my violin and performed to my heart’s content for thirty minutes or more. Emilio said business had been up since I’d started doing that, and he was right, there was rarely an empty seat during the dinner hour. I was glad for that, but I didn’t do it to increase business. I did it because it brought back good memories of when I played in my dad’s restaurant and how proud he’d been of me.

I wasn’t trying to recreate those days. They were gone, and I knew that. But I wanted to use what my father taught us, along with the new things we learned from Emilio, to make our restaurant the best it could be. Chase and I both wanted to succeed, and we were motivated to give it everything we had.

Several weeks had passed since Lucas and I parted ways, and I wanted to say things had gotten easier over time.

But honestly, things had not gotten easier.

In fact, my feelings had only intensified and that concerned me.

Sometimes a wave of emotion washed over me, and it was so strong, it nearly knocked me over with its weight. I would get this panicky sensation like I’d lost something really important and had to find it or the world would end.

Maybe that sounded overly dramatic, but it was real. When those times hit, I’d take a break and step outside, say a prayer and concentrate on breathing in and out.

I did my best to keep my thoughts off of Lucas, but it wasn’t easy. He was always there . . . just on the edge of my consciousness.

Thankfully, my work schedule kept me busy, and that was a huge blessing. If I’d had a lot of time to sit at home, I wasn’t sure what would have become of me. It took everything I had to fight against depression—not because I was dissatisfied with my life as it was, but because I longed for that one missing piece.

“What are you still doing here?” Emilio said, taking hold of my elbow and giving me a slight nudge towards the exit. “You have a date.” He motioned for me to go with a huge grin on his face.

He knew about the date because Mason had come to see the restaurant a couple weeks ago, and he’d reminded me in front of everyone that I owed him a night out. I was pretty sure he’d done that on purpose so there’d be no getting out of it.

“It’s too busy right now. I should probably cancel.”

“You can’t do that. I saw the way that boy looked at you. He’ll be crushed if you don’t go out with him.” He hesitated. “There was only one other person who’s looked at you like that—Mr. Armstrong.” He eyed me curiously. “Whatever happened between you two?”

My posture fell and my heart squeezed in my chest. “We were just friends. That’s all it was.”

“Huh.” He put a hand on his chin. “I could have sworn . . .” He shrugged. “Anyway, go have a good time with Mason. I’ll give Chase a ride home.”

“I’ll try. And thanks.”

I walked out to the parking lot and slid into my red Beetle, which I loved by the way, and pulled out onto the street.

I would try to have a good time, but things had been a little uncomfortable with Mason once I’d gotten back. He and I used to spend a lot of time together, but between putting in a lot of hours at the restaurant and having my brother back home, we hadn’t seen as much of each other. Understandably, Chase had taken up a lot of my free time. He was my priority, and I’d made that clear to Mason. Even so, I still made time for him because he was my friend, but the dynamic between us had changed. He was no longer content to let things stay the way they had been, and I was uneasy about taking the friendship to another level. I blamed it on my concern for Chase. He needed me to have his back more than ever.

Chase was getting back on track, but it hadn’t been easy for him, and I was determined to be the support he needed. He was even busier than I was since he had weekly therapy and support groups. On the side, he was studying to get his GED. He also had a monthly appointment with his probation officer. I’d been disappointed to find out he’d been arrested during a drug raid before he went into rehab, but the district attorney waived jail time if he agreed to go for treatment. That was how he’d ended up in rehab to begin with. In a way, it was a blessing he’d gotten in trouble with the law. Without that push for treatment, he might still be on the street.

He confessed that he’d been a Meth addict, and he’d dabbled with a few other drugs as well. It had started back in high school when he got involved with the wrong crowd. He ran away because he didn’t want his lifestyle to hurt the family he was living with. That was the Chase I remembered—always thinking of others before himself. I was just thankful he hadn’t been abused. That was something that had worried me for years.

He told me he’d meant to get in contact with me once he got clean and pulled himself together, but he became so embroiled in the lifestyle of an addict that he’d thought of only one thing: his next fix.

By the time he realized how long it had been since we’d spoken, he didn’t know how to find me. He beat himself up frequently for his lack of communication with me. I had to keep assuring him it was okay, that God broke through all of that and brought us back together, anyway. I made him promise he’d never do it again, and I told him that if he did, I’d kick his butt.

When I got home, I showered and cleaned myself up, praying God would help me to have an open mind towards Mason. He was a good guy. A really good guy. I just needed to stop comparing him to Lucas.

The doorbell rang and I answered. It was Mason, dressed in a black blazer and dark jeans, his hair gelled and styled back. “You look beautiful,” he said.

“Thank you.” But instead of being lifted up by the compliment, it made me want to further retreat into my shell. That wasn’t a good sign, but I pushed against my natural inclination to shut down and put on a happy smile. “Are you ready?”

“I’ve been ready for weeks, my dear. And I’m more than ready to make this the best night of your life.”

He extended his elbow and I linked my arm through his. We walked to his car, and a deep ache settled in my chest because I wanted to be doing this with Lucas.

Cut it out, Aria. Stop thinking about him.

I would give Mason the chance he deserved. Tonight would be all about him and me.

And no one else.

Not even Lucas, who was probably busy wooing the next woman on his father’s list at this very moment.

It was time to forget about him.

Chapter 24

Lucas

I walked out of Emilio’s restaurant with a heavy heart.

My plan had been to stop by to see how Aria and Chase were doing, only Aria wasn’t there tonight. Emilio said she’d gone on a date. The one I’d made her promise to go on with that friend of hers. Emilio had looked at me with curiosity before he’d told me where she was, and if I hadn’t been mistaken, he seemed a little protective of her. Almost wary of my intentions.

Good. She needed someone like him to look out for her.

He didn’t know that I’d asked Aria to go on that date.

Why had I done that again?

Oh, yeah. I wanted her to be happy. I really did. But the thought of her with some other guy . . . It made me physically ill.

After spending several weeks in Boston with Eliza Everest, the next woman on my father’s list, I’d come back to L.A. for the weekend to see for myself how Aria fared. My concern for her had practically crippled my efforts these last few weeks. Eliza had seemed interested, but she remained somewhat aloof as if she noticed my half-hearted attempts to spend time with her were forced.

My father had been strangely distant in all of it. I hadn’t heard from him in two weeks. He’d been angry when he found out I’d failed with Hillary, but he’d seemed almost indifferent the last time I’d spoken with him, maybe even a little weak. I chalked it up to him having a bad day.

My mind swung to Aria again.

She was in my thoughts constantly.

The day I introduced myself to Eliza and asked her to go out to dinner, Aria was there. At least, the image of her was not far from my thoughts. I’d done my best to appear interested in Eliza, to put on a front. But it was as if Aria’s shadow was there as a reminder of how much I missed her.

She haunted my dreams at night.

She filled my thoughts when I woke up in the morning.

No matter how hard I tried to get her out of my head, I couldn’t let her go.

I slid into the vehicle and cleared my throat, which was incredibly dry at the moment. “We’re going to Manny’s Steakhouse next. It’s in West L.A. somewhere.”

Sam nodded and pulled up his GPS, searching for the restaurant. Once he found it, he drove away from the curb. “Did you see Aria and her brother?” Sam always stayed out of my business, but it seemed he was too curious to bite his tongue this evening.

“No. Chase was in the kitchen, and I didn’t want to bother him. Aria is . . .” I pinched the bridge of my nose and let out a sigh.

Sam’s eyes met mine through the rearview mirror. “Is she okay?”

“Yeah, she’s on a date.”

He nodded slowly. “And that bothers you?”

Of course, it bothered me. What kind of question was that? I swallowed. “My feelings aren’t relevant. I just want to make sure she’s okay.”

“All right. Let’s go check on her then.”

We were both quiet for the rest of the drive, and I was left to dwell on my own thoughts. I would see her this one last time. If she seemed fine, I would let her go for good.

I had to let her go.

Because thoughts of her were eating me alive, and if I wanted to survive in this complicated world, I had to move on before I became a madman lost in the recesses of his own mind.

The weight of what I had to do crushed down on my shoulders, my chest.

Marry a woman I didn’t love, and, most likely, divorce her later on. For what? So I could continue this lifestyle?

The one that hadn’t made me happy yet.

The one that gave me power, but at the end of the day, left me completely alone and empty.

For the first time, I was starting to wonder if it was worth it.

“This is it,” Sam said, pulling into the parking lot of a large steakhouse. “Want me to go in with you?”

I shook my head. “No. I don’t plan to speak with her. I’ll only be a few minutes.”

A weighty feeling pushed down on me as I exited the vehicle and walked inside the restaurant. My feet were lead blocks, barely able to carry me to my destination. I told the hostess I was looking for someone, so she left me alone to scan the room.

My gaze wandered, and it didn’t take long to find her, sitting at a corner table. Her eyes were lit up as she engaged in conversation with a man wearing a black blazer. He looked completely enamored with her. No surprise there. Who wouldn’t be? He was probably a decent guy if she considered him a friend, but he didn’t seem good enough for her.

But as long as she was happy, I would walk away.

I watched them, looking for a sign, for anything that would tell me she’d moved on. As much as I wanted to find it so I could be rid of this thing between us, I knew it would break me when I did.

And there it was. Her smile. She seemed happy. He reached across the table and covered her hand with his own. My eyes honed in on her response. She appeared a little uncomfortable, but she didn’t pull away. Her lips parted like she wanted to say something, but then she closed them.

She was giving him a chance. Allowing him to touch her.

Bile rose in my throat, and I almost turned and hightailed it out of there because I couldn’t stand to watch another second. But at the same time, I couldn’t look away.

She was doing what I’d asked her to do, but I’d never considered the repercussions. What if I couldn’t get over her? What if she moved on and I never did? What if I was making a huge mistake by walking away—one that would haunt me for the rest of my life?

The guy pulled his hand away, thank goodness for that. But then she reached forward and covered his hand with her own.

What??

Had I completely misread her discomfort before? Of course I had. I’d wanted to see something that wasn’t there.

My heart skidded to a halt, and it felt like I was slowly dying inside. As if the blood was draining out of me.

Abruptly, I walked out of the restaurant and headed for the parking lot where Sam waited. I ducked into the car, pain washing over me like a thousand needles pricking my skin. “Let’s get out of here.”

Sam frowned, looking at me with concern. “Is everything—”

“Now, Sam.”

I shut the partition between us and put my head in my hands. Why had I gone inside that restaurant? What was I thinking? Had I lost my mind?

Yes, that had to be it. I was losing it. That image of her covering his hand with her own would stay with me forever. It made me sick to my stomach. I wanted to throw something, to destroy everything in sight, but I had to contain myself.

Maybe that image was what I needed in order to move on.

Sam took me home, and I headed straight for my room. My plan was to go to sleep, so I didn’t have to think about it anymore. Unfortunately, that didn’t work because I tossed and turned in my bed until I grew angry and frustrated with my place in life. I threw my pillow across the room and pounded the wall.

God, don’t you even care? Why have you done this to me? Why did you make me love someone when it’s impossible to be with her?

And then it hit me: the words that had so easily rolled off my tongue in that prayer. I was in love with her. I was in love with a woman I could never have. I’d never loved anyone before.

Not until Aria.

Even if I defied my father—and I was starting to believe I should—I would never be good enough for her. I’d done too many horrible things in my life, and she was innocent. How could I sully her like that?

The night air filtering through the window felt oppressive. My insides twisted in agony. It hadn’t been this bad since that day I found out my mother had another family and didn’t want anything to do with me. The memory of standing on the edge of that building turned my stomach to lead.

I would never do something like that again. No matter how bad it got—I had to push against the inclination to take the easy route.

My eyes fell on the Bible Sam gave me at the beginning of the trip to Kauai. It sat, unopened on my desk like a forgotten promise. I’d told Sam I would read the book of John, yet, I hadn’t even tried. 

I picked it up and sat back on my bed, leaning against the headboard. Opening the pages, I began to read, continuing until I came to chapter six, verse thirty-five. Jesus said to them, “I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst.”

Jesus had done a miracle by giving bread and fish to a huge crowd of people, yet, He now referred to Himself as the bread of life. It struck me as peculiar that He would refer to Himself that way. What did it mean?

When I came to chapter eight, verse twelve stuck out to me. Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”

There was no doubt in my mind that I was walking in darkness. It wasn’t just sadness that weighed upon me. The many things I’d done—the nasty things I’d said, the dishonest business practices, the manipulations, the bullying, the coldness that had taken over my heart.

My sin.

It hurt to look at it. To gaze in the mirror and see the man I’d become.

If Jesus was light, and I followed Him, would I be rid of that darkness?

A part of me wanted to put the Bible down and turn on the TV instead. Even as I reached for the remote, my mind said that was for the best because it was hopeless.

But something else held me back.

Maybe I should read this, not just because I’d promised Sam, but because I needed these words. I needed something outside of myself to heal the brokenness of my life because I couldn’t do it on my own.

I’d already tried, and no amount of money or power or influence had gotten me anywhere. When I flipped to chapter ten, verse nine stood out on the page like a beacon. Jesus had just been referring to Himself as a shepherd, and his followers as sheep. He said: “I am the door. If anyone enters by me, he will be saved and will go in and out and find pasture.”

I was starting to see a pattern. Jesus referred to Himself as the source of life, the light, the door to salvation. If I entered through Him, I would find salvation. When He’d said He was the bread of life, maybe He wasn’t talking about actual food. Putting it into context, perhaps it meant He would satisfy the deepest emotional hunger one felt.

At no time in my life had I ever considered religion to be of any importance. And yet, Sam’s words echoed in my head. It’s not a religion. It’s a relationship with the Lord. A way of life. Something that takes place in your heart . . . He changes you on the inside.

I sat up, resting my elbows on my knees, and my hands covered my head. God, if you’re listening, I need your help. Please forgive my sin and change me on the inside. I believe in you, Jesus, and I want a relationship with you. The kind Sam spoke about. Take my life—I give it to you.

Tears gathered at my eyes, and I continued to pray like that for . . . I didn’t know how long it was, but at some point, I slid under the covers and rested my head on the pillow. A sense of peace I’d never experienced before washed over me, calming my heart and my mind.

Sleep came easily after that.

***

The next morning when I awoke, the first thing on my mind was the freedom that filled me like an airborne bird, gliding over the ocean with the breeze blowing through its feathers.

The heaviness I’d felt the day before was gone, replaced by a sweet lightness that lingered over every part of my soul. 

The second thing that came to mind was that I wanted to finish reading John. It was no longer a duty to appease Sam, but a deep hunger I couldn’t explain. I picked up the Bible and scooted back against the headboard of my bed. For the next hour, I continued to read until I finished, and then I started the book of Luke.

I didn’t know why I chose that book next, it just seemed to call to me, so I listened. All morning I read, skipping breakfast, not bothering to answer my phone or even look at it.

Something had changed inside of me.

It was palpable. Real. Even though I didn’t know how to explain it except to say I’d had an encounter with God.

Which in another time of my life would have seemed ludicrous.

But now, it was more real than anything else I’d ever experienced.

I came to Luke, chapter nineteen and read about a rich tax collector named Zacchaeus who had swindled people out of their money. Jesus was passing through, but the crowds were so dense that Zacchaeus had to climb a tree in order to see Him. Jesus addressed him and told him to come down, then offered to stay at his house. Zacchaeus was so excited he told Jesus he would give half of his goods to the poor, and if he defrauded anyone, restore it fourfold.

My heart skipped a beat. Hadn’t I defrauded others in my business practices? Hadn’t I been dishonest more than a few times?

The first person who came to mind was Henry Townsend and the meeting we’d had right before I left for Kauai. I had purchased his land with the informal agreement that I’d build an office building that could be used for the community in some way. He’d said his mother had wanted that. I’d brushed over his statement, not too concerned. In reality, my plan had been to rent the spaces to high profile businesses who could afford to pay a hefty sum. Sure, I would have considered non-profits in that equation—only if they could dish out the kind of money I asked for.

My stomach soured at the memory. The way I’d assured him I’d adhere to his mother’s wishes. How easily the words had flowed off my tongue when I’d told him I was a man of my word, when in reality, I lacked honesty and integrity and compassion.

Construction had barely begun, but it wasn’t too late to stop it. One of my project managers had been managing that property and the work involved. I picked up my phone and called him. “Hey, what’s the status on the Lakeshore building?”

He was hesitant before he spoke. “There have been a few delays, but don’t worry, I’m on it.”

“What kind of delays?” I paced in front of my window, looking out at the vast city of L.A. “Never mind. It doesn’t matter. Just tell me, how far along are we in construction?”

He was silent for a moment. “Actually, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about that.” His voice cracked. “We’ve had some issues with the construction company. They’re behind in other projects and—”

“Hold off on all plans for now. I want to reassess our business plan for that property.”

“Oh?” He sounded surprised. “I thought your father was pushing for it to be done as soon as possible.”

“Yes, but he’s put me in charge, and I want to reevaluate.”

“Of course, Mr. Armstrong. Let me know when you know more.”

“I will.” I hung up and set the phone on my bed. My dad wouldn’t be happy, but I had to honor my word to use that property for the community. I didn’t know how yet, but I’d figure it out.

My phone rang, and I answered right away when I saw it was my sister, Calista. We hadn’t spoken in quite a while. “Calista, what’s up?”

“Lucas, hey, I’m glad you answered.” Her voice sounded weak, off.

“Did you think I wouldn’t?”

“You’re always so busy.”

“I know. Sorry I didn’t return your call last week. I’ve been going through something.”

She was silent. No response.

“Calista? Are you there? Is everything okay?”

She sniffed and it sounded like she’d been crying. “I don’t know how to tell you this, so I’m just going to say it.” There was a long pause. “He died, Lucas. He’s gone.”

My heart dropped to my stomach. “Who died?”

“Dad.” Her breath shuddered. “When he didn’t get up this morning, one of the staff went into his room to check on him.” Her voice broke. “He was in bed, but he was lifeless. It must have happened in his sleep.” She began to cry. “We knew he was declining, but none of us expected it to happen this fast. Hospice services hadn’t even started yet.”

A sharp pain shot through my gut. I’d known his health wasn’t good, but a part of me thought he’d live on forever. The fact that he was gone . . . I couldn’t fathom it.

“I’m coming over right now.”

Chapter 25

Lucas

It rarely rained in L.A. during the summer.

Rarely.

And that accounted for the many years we’d gone through a drought and had to cut back on water usage. It also accounted for the lack of greenery at times—California hills were usually dry and brown—but that was typical Southern California for you.

All that to say, a freak storm moved in just as we laid my father’s body in the ground to rest. It was as if he wanted us to know he was there, keeping an eye out, holding us to the plans he had for each of us.

Attempting to control even the weather so he could go out with a bang.

A crack of thunder rolled through the air, and I flinched—the timing was too weird. I knew Dad couldn’t reach through the grave and force me to do anything I didn’t want to do anymore, but still, a heavy weight pushed down on my shoulders because it all seemed surreal.

And I’d been numb through the service.

Numb through the outdoor ceremony.

And now that it was almost over, as rain drifted down over us, soaking those of us who’d been too stubborn to believe we would need an umbrella—which was nearly everyone, by the way—I only felt an immense sadness. 

Sadness that I’d never had a loving relationship with my father.

Sadness that I’d let him control my behavior all these years.

I’d made my own choices, but I’d allowed him to influence me when my conscience knew better.

My heart felt as though it was cracking open—not because I missed him. But because of the deep pain that went along with an abusive relationship that had finally come to a conclusion. 

The physical abuse had ended long ago.

The verbal abuse had never ended.

At some point, my father had shown enough respect to allow me a small measure of control over his company, but it had always come with a price. If I didn’t please him, he took out his anger on me.

Love was never a part of the equation.

Neither were compassion or affection or a sense of reasonableness.

I’d lost a great many things in my life. 

But I hadn’t lost a relationship with my father.

You couldn’t lose something you never had to begin with.

The thought tore at me like a vulture tearing apart dead flesh, and as I stood there surrounded by so many people, I couldn’t help but feel that I was truly alone in this world. Grief that I didn’t understand flooded through me again and again.

Everyone stood apart from me as if they were afraid of getting too close. The longing for someone to be at my side was so severe, it felt as though my chest was caving in. All these years, I’d pushed people away, and, now, there was no one.

What had I expected? People would suddenly reach out when I’d made it difficult to even be around me? They probably thought I didn’t have feelings because that was the only image I’d allowed anyone to see. 

Just as the minister said his last words, I turned to face the crowd gathered to pay their respects. From the corner of my eye, I saw long black hair, and a petite figure moving in my direction. I blinked in the rain, water falling down my face, obscuring my vision. My eyes were playing tricks on me because I could have sworn I’d seen Aria.

Or maybe that was what I wanted most right now.

I turned back around, deciding it couldn’t be her. She didn’t even know my father had passed, and we hadn’t stayed in touch.

“Lucas.”

A soft hand touched my arm, and I turned to face the person who’d spoken my name. It was her. I knew that voice. And she was so beautiful I almost groaned. A sight for sore eyes. The one woman who had managed to have a real effect on me. I’d wanted to see her because I needed her. More than anything right now, I needed her. She seemed to sense that because she hugged me, and I let her. I wrapped my arms around her and didn’t care that everyone stared at us. They were probably stunned to see me hug anyone. It wasn’t something I did.

Aria and I stood there, holding each other for a long time. The rain let up, and the sun peaked through the clouds.

“How did you know?” I whispered. I still hadn’t let go of her, and I wasn’t sure if I would.

“Sam called and gave me the details.”

I smiled faintly. “Sam.” Of course. How could I have thought I was all alone? I had at least one person who had my back. And Aria was here even though we’d kept our distance for good reasons.

That distance . . . It had to change.

I pulled away and put my hands on both sides of her face. “Thank you for coming. You being here means everything to me.”

The gesture seemed to trouble her because she stepped back, allowing my hands to drop from her face. “I’m sorry about your dad.” There was yearning in her eyes and pain and fear. She rubbed her arms. “This has to be hard on you. I know what it’s like.”

I took my suit jacket off and wrapped it around her shoulders. “The weather’s weird today, isn’t it?” I wasn’t quite ready to talk about my feelings when it came to my dad.

She nodded. “Yeah. It’s unexpected.”

“Just like you. I didn’t think you’d come today.”

“You didn’t think I’d want to be there for you?” She seemed almost insulted by my statement.

“That’s not what I meant. You’re the one person I wanted to be here, but I didn’t think it was possible.”

“You really feel that way?”

“Yes.” I took her hand in my own, not willing to release contact. “We need to talk—”

“Lucas.” It was my father’s attorney, Dan Sanders, appearing both stern and impatient. “I know this isn’t a great time, but your father requested I go over the terms of his will shortly after his ceremony. It was his wish that you, your sister, and your stepmother, Sharon, meet with me immediately.”

“But we’re supposed to have a reception.”

“Sharon has people to handle that. You can join everyone afterward.”

“You do realize this is unconventional, right? Normally this stuff is handled after the funeral—days later or even longer.”

“Your father was very specific in his request.”

I nodded. Of course. My father always had a specific request, and now it was interfering in the one opportunity I had to speak with Aria. I squeezed her hand. “I have to go, but I really need to talk with you. Will you have dinner with me tomorrow night?”

She composed her expression, but anyone who looked hard enough would’ve seen the pain behind her eyes. She had mixed feelings about me—that much was clear. “Lucas, I . . . I don’t think that’s a good idea. We can’t . . .” She didn’t finish the sentence, but I understood her hesitation.

“A lot of things have changed, Aria. I just want the opportunity to . . .” I ducked my head and blew out a breath. This was harder than I thought. “Please, it’s vital that we talk. Will you meet with me?”

Worry lines formed in the middle of her brow, and she averted her eyes. Was she with that Mason guy now? Had they come to some kind of understanding? A sick feeling pummeled my insides. I wanted to ask, but I wasn’t sure I could handle the truth right now. It had already been a hard-enough day as it was.

I lifted a trembling hand to touch her hair. She closed her eyes and leaned into my touch. The yearning to always have her at my side came back with a fury, and I drew in a ragged breath.

“Mr. Armstrong, whenever you’re ready,” Dan said, a few feet away, seeming agitated.

I glanced at him and frowned. Let him wait. I didn’t care. I turned back to Aria. “So, dinner tomorrow? Are we on?”

She hesitated again, and I could see her debating within herself. And just like that, all my hopes fell flat on the ground. She was with that guy.

“I tell you what,” she said. “How about if you come to Emilio’s tomorrow, and I’ll make sure you get one of Chase’s amazing pizzas. We can talk there.”

She didn’t want to be alone with me, yet another reason to believe she was looking for a way to remain faithful to Mason. It stung, but it was the best compromise I would get, so I nodded. “Until tomorrow. I’ll see you at six.”

I followed Dan to a car waiting for us at the curb, and I wasn’t sure which was worse: hearing I’d lost my entire inheritance because I didn’t meet my father’s terms, or knowing I might have lost the only woman I’d ever come to love.

Shaking my head, my jaw tightened as reality sunk in. There was no contest: only Aria mattered. Everything else could slip through my fingers, and I’d let it go.

But I couldn’t let her go.

Even if she was with that Mason guy, I would fight for her. I didn’t go all these years without love to let it get away from me now. My father had never been a good example, but he did teach me one good thing: how to be driven.

I would not give up until Aria told me she no longer wanted to see me. It was a promise I made to myself. A promise I would keep.

***

Calista and I sat in the lobby of Dan Sanders’ office. Our stepmother, Sharon, was meeting with him privately while we waited. Dan had informed us that according to my father’s instructions, he was to meet with each of us individually.

Divide and conquer. Was that my father’s plan? It was always easier to manipulate people when you kept them out of the know. Whatever. It didn’t matter. I’d already resolved myself to the fact that I was going to have to let the inheritance go. Even if Aria refused me, I wouldn’t allow my father to control me anymore. I’d tried to force myself to marry someone I didn’t love, and every part of me had rebelled against the notion.

I couldn’t do it.

Did that make me some kind of sentimental sap? Hardly. But maybe I did have some principals after all. Who knew?

“I wonder what they’re talking about in there,” Calista whispered, smoothing back a piece of her light brown hair.

I shrugged. “I don’t care.”

She widened her eyes and gave me a look that said she thought I was crazy. “How can you sit there so calmly? Aren’t you worried? You never met his requirements. You might end up with . . .” She stopped herself as if afraid she might upset me.

I smiled, and for the first time since we’d gotten to Dan’s office, the smile felt real. “I might end up with nothing.”

“I’m sorry, Lucas. I shouldn’t have said that. I’m sure you’re going to get something.”

I laughed, and it actually felt good. “I’m okay with this. It feels like . . . like I’m free.”

She stared at me like I’d lost my mind, and then she bit down on her bottom lip and clasped her hands together. “Does it have anything to do with that woman you were hugging?”

I nodded, trying to hold back a grin but failing. “Yeah, it has everything to do with her.”

“Have you fallen . . .” She frowned. “Impossible. That’s not you.”

“Have I fallen in love? Is that what you were going to ask?”

She nodded, waiting for an answer.

“Yes.” I paused, allowing that word to sink in. “I love her so much that it’s changed everything. I’m willing to give it all up for her.”

Her head jerked back. “I don’t know what to say.”

“It just happened. I tried to control it but I couldn’t.”

“You’re not upset you might lose the inheritance? How can you not care about that?”

I let out a long breath. “Of course I care. But the price of keeping it is too high. I never thought I’d say this, but money isn’t everything.”

Her eyes widened. “Who are you? And where have you hidden my brother?”

I laughed. “I know this must seem strange to you. I’m still trying to adapt to this new outlook myself.”

“Well, no wonder you’re so calm. You’ve had time to think about it.” She shifted in her seat, hands still folded tightly together. “I wish I didn’t care about the money, but I do. I have debts I need to pay off.”

I frowned. “What kind of debts?”

“It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

The door to Dan’s office swung open and Sharon stepped out, dabbing the corners of her eyes even though there were no real tears. “Thank you, Mr. Sanders. I appreciate all your help.” They continued to talk in low tones by the doorway.

Calista and I both stood in anticipation that one of us was going next. She reached over and took my hand. “If you don’t get anything, I’ll share whatever I receive after my debts are paid.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

She smiled. “I want to. We may not be that close, but you’re my brother. You’re the only family I have left.”

My gut clenched. “I’ve failed you, Calista, in so many ways. I wish . . .” I let my head drop. “There are a lot of things I wish, and I can’t go back. But I want us to have a better relationship.”

Her eyes softened. “I’d like that, too, Lucas.”

Sharon walked towards us, a happy smile on her face. Clearly, she’d gotten what she wanted.

“Did everything go as expected?” Calista asked.

“Yes.” She hesitated for a second. “I got the Los Angeles house, several of the vehicles, and a very generous amount to carry me through the rest of my life.”

She seemed very pleased, and though Sharon and I hardly ever interacted because she kept busy with her social clubs and charities—I was actually happy for her. She’d earned that money putting up with my father all those years.

“Calista,” Dan said. “You’re next.”

She stepped into his office and closed the door. I turned my attention to Sharon. “I’m glad everything worked out the way you wanted it to.”

She didn’t sit and her expression turned sour. “Thank you, Lucas. I hope things work out for . . . you too.” It was like she had to force the last two words out of her mouth.

Fair enough. She’d married my father when I was fourteen, and I hadn’t readily accepted her. As I grew older, we learned to stay out of each other’s way for the most part. She never really liked me which was fine. We both knew she was only there for the money, not because she actually loved my father or cared about us. I mean, what woman would be with my father for any other reason? He was a misogynist for crying out loud.

“Maybe this isn’t the time,” I said, “but I’ve been thinking a lot. I’m sorry for all the times I made life difficult. I wasn’t an easy teen to deal with.”

She gave me a tight-lipped smile. “I’m aware you haven’t met your father’s terms, and now it’s too late, isn’t it?” She shrugged as if it was nothing to her. “Don’t try to kiss up to me now that I control a good portion of the wealth.”

“I wasn’t trying to kiss up to you. I was simply trying to apologize—”

“Keep your apology. I don’t want it.” She straightened. “You have three days to get your belongings out of my house. After that, I’m donating it to charity.” She smirked. “Or maybe I’ll sell some of it on eBay.”

She kicked one leg up behind her as she turned, a satisfied gleam in her eyes. “Goodbye.” She exited out the door, and I watched her out the window as she slid into a car and it took off. She must have called my father’s driver to pick her up.

I had a level of regret but not much. That was a relationship that wouldn’t have survived my father’s passing, anyway. She’d never cared about me, and now that she had what she’d waited for all these years, she wouldn’t make contact unless she had to.

About thirty minutes passed before Calista walked out the door. She exited the room, her face red, lips pinched.

“I’m sorry, Miss Armstrong,” Dan said regretfully. “His terms were clear and there’s nothing I can do. At least you have a year to decide.”

What was he talking about? “Calista?”

She shook her head. “Father. I can’t believe he did this to me.”

“What did he do?”

“Nothing. I don’t want to talk about it.”

My eyebrows flew up. “Did he leave you anything?”

She nodded. “Yes. But he has terms, of course.”

“What are the terms?”

“My instructions are not to discuss it with you until the will has been settled. Apparently, he doesn’t think you’ll be a good influence. If I tell you, my inheritance will be null and void.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah, wow,” she said, looking extremely perturbed. She sat down and motioned for me to go into the office. “Your turn. Have fun.” She smiled sweetly even though I could tell she was fuming inside.

I walked into Dan’s office and took a seat in front of his desk. He walked over to the door and closed it, then sat in his cushy black chair.

He sighed. “Let me first extend my condolences. I know this must be a difficult time for you.” He pulled out four envelopes from his desk drawer and set them down.

“Thank you.”

“This session won’t take nearly as long as Calista’s. I only have one question for you.”

“Okay.” I sat back against my seat and ran my hands down my legs. “Ask away.”

“Are you married?”

“No.”

“So, you haven’t married one of the women on your father’s list?”

I sat up straight, my gaze not leaving his. “As I said before, no.”

His expression remained flat, veiled. “I didn’t think so.” He lifted one of the envelopes and handed it to me. “Then this is the letter your father wants you to have. You are to read it right now in front of me.”

I ripped the seal and pulled out the folded paper.

Dear Lucas,

If you are receiving this letter, it’s because you have failed to meet my terms. In short, you have not convinced any of the women on my list to marry you. As you have inherited my good looks, and, from what I’ve heard, you have a measure of charm with the ladies, I can only conclude that you have gone against my wishes and have made very little effort.

I’m giving you a final chance. In three months, you are to meet with Dan Sanders one last time. If at that time you have followed my instructions, you will inherit forty percent of everything, including all the houses and most of the vehicles. Mr. Sanders will go over each item on a spreadsheet.

Your father,

Howard Armstrong

“But Sharon said she owned the Los Angeles house now.” That was the first thing that came out of my mouth? It was completely irrelevant, but after her earlier remarks, I was curious. 

Dan pressed his lips together with an annoyed look and steepled his fingers. “I made it clear to her that the house was hers only if you failed to meet the terms. She knows there will be another meeting in ninety days. Until then, you have access to everything, including running the business.”

I nodded. “She’s banking on the fact that I’ll fail.” I hesitated. “Well, she’s right. I don’t plan to marry anyone on that list. Not now. Not ever.”

Dan didn’t blink. “Regardless, you are to meet with me again in three months. At that time, we will discuss what items you are allowed to keep.”

“All right.” I got up to leave.

“One last thing.”

“Yes?” I lingered at the doorway.

“Life is too short to worry about these things. Marry the woman you love and don’t look back.” He turned to gather his belongings, already dismissing me.

Well, that was odd. How did he know I loved someone? Maybe he’d come to that conclusion when he’d seen me hugging Aria. Or maybe he meant it as a general statement of advice. Either way, it wasn’t anything I didn’t already know.

If I got married, it would be for love and no other reason.

Chapter 26

Aria

Playing the violin was one of the few things that calmed me besides prayer and studying the word. Lucas would be at the restaurant anytime now, and I’d become so fidgety, I picked up my instrument and began to play, hoping that would soothe my frayed nerves.

Closing my eyes, I let muscle memory take over as I went through the motions, my fingers moving on the strings, my arm working the bow back and forth.

Yesterday, after seeing Lucas at his father’s funeral, I’d gone home a complete mess, and I wasn’t speaking of how the rain wreaked havoc in my hair. Inside, I felt like I was falling apart. Three weeks hadn’t been enough to crush my feelings for Lucas and seeing him again was a huge setback. The ache in my gut that had followed me around since we’d left Kauai was front and center once more.

I’d already done everything I could to put him out of my mind. I worked hard at the restaurant, and when I got home, I cleaned every surface of the place.

None of it worked because pushing away thoughts of Lucas was a bit like swimming upstream. At some point, I’d stopped trying because doing the impossible was exhausting. Every day I prayed that God would free me of these feelings, but, so far, He hadn’t released me.

The mood in the room shifted, and the air became electrically charged somehow. He was here. I just knew it.

Opening my eyes, I glanced up, and he was watching me from a booth in the back of the restaurant, away from all the others where Emilio must have seated him. I finished the song, my heart beating at a restless pace, and then put my violin away and walked over to sit across from him. “Hey, Lucas.”

“Hey.” He cleared his throat. He was dressed casually in dark jeans and a white button-down shirt that had been rolled up to his elbows. “You played beautifully just now.”

“Thanks.”

He nodded. “Thank you for seeing me.”

“Of course. What did you want to talk about?”

His hand trembled, and he ducked it under the table out of sight. That was odd. He was always so confident. But then again, his father had just died. I knew their relationship had been strained at best, but it had to still affect him.

He was quiet for a long moment, looking down at the table as if struggling to say something. “Leaving you here in L.A. and flying out to Boston was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do.” A shadow passed across his face. “I thought holding onto my inheritance took precedence over everything else, even my own feelings, but now . . .”

“Now?”

He held my gaze, eyes sad and hopeful all at once. “You’ve come to mean a great deal to me. I’m not sure when it happened, but I knew there was something special about you the first time I saw you at Coastal Heritage Museum.” He began to speak faster as if afraid I might object. “I know you’re probably with Mason now, but I can’t let things go without telling you how I feel—”

“I’m not with Mason.” 

“I thought the two of you . . .” He glanced away and then brought his gaze back to me, my words sinking in. “You’re not?”

His eyes bored into mine, waiting for an answer. The light reflected off his cheekbones, and I noticed his five o’clock shadow was more pronounced today, making him appear rugged.

“Mason and I are just friends,” I said. “I’m not interested in more. He understands that now.”

A smile slowly lit up his features. “Oh.” He cleared his throat again. “The day you had your date, I came by the restaurant.”

“You did?”

He nodded. “Emilio said you were at Manny’s Steakhouse, so I stopped by. I told myself I had to see you one last time.”

“Emilio never said anything to me. I never saw you there.”

“I just stepped in for a few seconds, but I saw you put your hand over Mason’s and thought . . .” He swallowed hard. “I thought you were giving him a chance.”

I shifted nervously in my seat, aware that I had his complete attention. Something told me I had the power to break this man—which I didn’t want to do—and it scared me to know his feelings had reached this level.

Mine had reached this point a long time ago, but how could we allow ourselves to go there when he was still planning on marrying another woman? Not to mention, my values hadn’t changed when it came to wanting a relationship where the Lord was front and center. I didn’t know if my heart could handle this discussion. Putting our feelings out there like this could lead to more heartbreak, but it seemed the truth was the only way to go. I sent up a desperate prayer to the Lord, asking for help.

“I tried to think of Mason as more,” I said. “But my heart wouldn’t follow what my head told it to do. He’s like a brother, and I will never see him as anything else.”

Lucas smiled so big now it was almost embarrassing. “That’s what I’d hoped to hear.”

Heat crept up my neck to my face, and I knew I was blushing. His eyes lingered on me as if in that one look, he might convey something important I needed to know.

Chase walked over with a large pepperoni and sausage pizza, along with two plates. “Look who’s here,” he said in that lighthearted manner my brother always used with people he liked. “Glad I get to make my specialty for you.”

“Thanks, man. Smells delicious.” Lucas lifted a thick slice of pizza and held it over his plate, taking a bite. “Mmmm.” He continued to chew. “This is so good,” he said with his mouth full. More chewing.

Chase waited for his final assessment.

Lucas gave a thumbs up. “Amazing. You outdid yourself. I haven’t eaten something this good since . . .” He appeared to think about that. “Since Kauai.” He glanced at me and winked.

My heart did little twirls and landed in my stomach. I pushed my plate away because there was no way I would eat with my stomach twisting and turning like it was.

“If you cook like this all the time,” Lucas continued, “no wonder this place is booming with customers.”

Chase beamed. “Thanks. Glad you like it.” He tipped his head. “I’d better get back to the kitchen. Enjoy.” He hurried off, no doubt in a rush to keep up with all the orders.

Lucas took another bite of the pizza. “I have to say, this is almost the best pizza I’ve ever had.”

“Almost?”

“Yeah, that one you made for me in Kauai was outstanding. Your brother’s is good, don’t get me wrong, but yours had a special touch.”

The way he looked at me with blue eyes blazing like he wanted to reach across the table and devour my lips . . . It did things to me. I flushed again, and my stomach went all fluttery. Goodness, I needed to get control of myself.

He put the pizza down on his plate, and one corner of his mouth lifted a little. “Now that I’m here, sitting across from you, I find that speech I prepared completely inadequate.”

“You have a speech?”

He grinned, and it was the most amazing thing I’d ever seen. “Yeah, but now that I’m in front of you I can’t think straight.”

“Lucas Armstrong can’t think straight? I find that hard to believe.”

He laughed. “If you could see what I see right now, you wouldn’t say that.”

“What do you see?”

“A beautiful, sensitive woman who is so humble, she has no idea how much she’s affected me. She doesn’t know that I’ve come to admire her immensely and she’s the only one . . .” He trailed off. “I’m getting ahead of myself.” He sat up straighter and leaned forward. “First off, I’m not marrying any of the women on my father’s list. Let me make that clear.”

My jaw dropped open. “Why not?”

“Because, as it turns out, I have a few principles after all. When I marry, it will be for love, and love alone.”

Goosebumps formed on my arms because he sounded like he meant it. “But what about your inheritance?”

“I’ve decided it’s better to have an inheritance in heaven.” He paused, and he must have seen the shock on my face because he smiled knowingly. “I get it. You’re finding this hard to believe. But it’s true. I’ve been doing a lot of reading lately. Yesterday I nearly devoured 1 Peter.”

My eyes widened. What was he saying? I’d never heard words like that come out of his mouth. “I’m sorry. I’m a little lost right now.”

“A week ago, I gave my life to the Lord. I promised Sam I’d read the book of John, and once I did, I came to the conclusion that Jesus is the light that shines in the darkness. He shined in the darkness of my heart, and I’m a new man.”

Warmth flooded through me at his words. “Lucas, I’m so happy for you.” Without thinking, I reached across the table and covered his hand with my own.

“Uh oh,” he said, winking. “Does this mean you’re giving me a chance?”

“Do you want me to give you a chance?” I giggled, sounding like a ditzy high school kid.

His face grew serious, and he put his other hand on top of mine, sandwiching it between both of his. “I’m in love with you, Aria. After everything I’ve experienced, I find it comes down to this one thing.”

My eyes widened at his words. “What’s that?”

He got out of his seat and dropped to one knee right in front of me. “Love.” He pulled a small black box out of his pocket and opened it, revealing a sparkling engagement ring.

I gasped, and my heart flopped around like an out-of-water fish. “Lucas.” My hand flew to my throat. “Are you asking . . .?”

“Yes. I know this is soon. I know we haven’t even had time to date, but I know what I want, and I can’t imagine a life without you in it. Aria, will you be my wife?”

Tears rushed from my eyes, but they were happy tears. I’d been trying to hold myself together, but now that I knew there were no more barriers between us, I didn’t even try to keep my composure. “Yes, Lucas, yes . . . yes  . . . yes.” I couldn’t stop saying yes. I laughed, realizing how flustered and comical I must appear. “I love you so much. You don’t know how hard it was watching you leave for Boston. I thought my heart would break.”

Before I could finish, he stood to his feet and pulled me up into his arms. He kissed me long and hard as if he’d been waiting to do that for a long time. His lips moved over mine, claiming me as his own, and I melted into his embrace, my heart thundering in my chest. When he pulled away, the entire room erupted in applause and cat whistles. Both of us turned to see customers out of their seats, clapping and smiling like this was the best event of the day.

I hadn’t even noticed we were being watched. Apparently, I’d been in my own world, the one where only Lucas and I existed.

Lucas chuckled and turned back to me. “I think they want to see another kiss.”

“We shouldn’t disappoint them then,” I said.

That was all I needed to say. He put his hands on both sides of my face and brushed his lips against mine in a slow and leisurely kiss. It was gentle and sweet and so tender I had to catch my breath when he was done.

“I don’t have a lot to offer you,” he said. “In three months, I have to meet with my father’s attorney again, and he’ll let me know what I can keep. It won’t be much.”

“I don’t care about any of that. You’re all I want.”

He pulled me into his arms again and kissed me on the forehead. “No one’s ever said that to me before.” He spoke in a low voice. “Not even my own parents.”

I put my hands on his face, my heart aching for him at this moment. “We’ll start our own family, and it’ll be full of so much love, you’ll forget what that was like.”

He smiled. “I’m looking forward to that.”

Chapter 27

Lucas

2 months later . . .

“Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?” I clutched both of Aria’s hands, warmth flooding over me as my thumbs tenderly stroked her soft skin. “I do.” The words came easily off my tongue because I couldn’t wait to marry her.

Maybe to some, it seemed as if we’d rushed to the altar, but in my mind, there was no point in waiting. I’d never encountered a love like this before, and neither had Aria. She was just as excited, and even though we may have hurried a little, we both understood the commitment we were making was for a lifetime. I’d gotten involved at Aria’s church, and we’d met every week with the pastor for premarital counseling. We both were ready for this.

She stood radiant before me in a modest white gown that touched her feet. It wasn’t a designer dress, and it didn’t have lots of beading or sparkle. There was a bit of lace at the neckline, but its classic simplicity and the way it hugged her curves was entirely perfect. Aria didn’t need a lot of glitz and glimmer to make her beautiful. She was already the most beautiful woman in the world to me.

The minister asked her the same question, and she said, “I do,” with a smile on her face.

And then he had us say our vows. I repeated each phrase, meaning every word as I gazed into her eyes. Next, it was Aria’s turn.

“I, Aria, take you, Lucas, to be my lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer”—she squeezed my hands, letting me know she was with me no matter the status of my income—“in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.”

We exchanged rings, and then we came to the best part of the day. “I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”

I leaned forward and kissed my wife.

My wife.

We were married now, and a rush of joy flooded through me as I took her in my arms. We turned to face the audience, and the pianist played an upbeat celebratory song. I lifted our joined hands in the air. “Woohoo! We did it!” I grinned as my eyes scanned the crowd and fell upon Alexa and Dylan, holding hands, both smiling broadly at us. Aria and I had beat them to the altar, but they would have their time soon.

In all honesty, it was a miracle they were even here. A few weeks ago, I’d met with them and apologized for my behavior. I’d told them about my new faith in Christ and asked for their forgiveness for my part in causing trouble in their relationship. Not only had I ruthlessly pushed Alexa to marry me back then because she was first on my father’s list, but I’d wronged Dylan by judging him. I thought he was a loser because he was poor, and I’d refused to see the man that he actually was. Now, I was ashamed to think of those days. Slowly, God was changing me into a new man. Dylan and Alexa both forgave me, and while we weren’t all best buds yet or anything, it was amazing to see how God could change hearts.  

Once we exited the church, I leaned over and kissed Aria again, this time more hungrily than before since it was just the two of us, and everyone was only now filtering out of the chapel.

It had been a small ceremony with a few friends from church. Chase and Sam and Emilio were all there, of course, and even Mason. He’d brought a date, someone who had professed her interest a while back, so I didn’t have to feel too bad for him. It saddened me that my sister couldn’t be there. Soon after my father’s attorney, Dan Sanders, had gone over the terms of the will, she’d abruptly taken off. She’d texted me that she needed time to think, and would be incommunicado for a while. She told me not to worry and said she was traveling in Europe. I prayed for her every day and hoped God would work in her life like he had in mine.

Everything happened quickly after that. The reception was small, but a lot of fun. Neither of us wanted to make a big fuss. I could have spent a lot of money since I was technically still in control of my father’s estate, but Aria had urged me not to. She didn’t want all of that to overshadow what was really important. At first, I didn’t understand, but now I got it. Today was about us, our commitment to each other and to the Lord. All the other stuff faded away. They were just distractions, fun distractions mind you, but the celebration didn’t get in the way of the most significant thing—our love for each other.

When it was all over, we ran to the car while everyone threw birdseed at us, and Sam drove us to Aria’s house so we could make a quick stop to change into more comfortable clothing. From there, we headed to the airport and got on a plane. Aria had no idea where we were going since I’d kept that part a secret. And while I’d agreed to not spend too much on the wedding, I didn’t make that promise when it came to the honeymoon. I was whisking her off to Venice, Italy, for two weeks, and then planned on taking her to my house in Kauai for the last week.

It might be the last time we’d get to go there since my inheritance would soon be null and void. I wasn’t sure if Calista would get the house, or if it would go to Sharon. But just in case it went to Sharon, I wanted to make the trip out one final time.

I looked forward to being alone with Aria. Sam was awesome, but he needed to stay home this time.

On the plane, Aria leaned her head against my shoulder like she had on the first trip to Kauai. I knew she was probably a little nervous about flying, but I would do everything in my power to make her feel safe. I smoothed a lock of hair behind her ear and kissed her on the forehead. “You okay?”

She smiled and nodded. “Just keep holding me and I’ll be fine.”

“Get used to it, Mrs. Armstrong, because I’m going to hold you a lot during our marriage. You might even get tired of it.”

“Never. I could never get tired of you holding me.”

“Even when I’m as poor as a church mouse?”

She sat up just enough so she could kiss me on the cheek. “Especially then.”

“Are you sure it won’t bother you that in another month, I might not have a cent to my name?”

She laughed. “If that happens, then we’ll share a package of cheap ramen noodles and be thankful for what we have.”

“You’ll still have the restaurant and the Victorian house. No one can take that away.”

“I know.” She snuggled up against me. “I just don’t ever want you to think that money matters to me because it doesn’t.” She kissed me on the cheek again. “You, Lucas Armstrong, are all I want.”

And that was the kind of woman I’d just married. No matter what stood on the horizon, I couldn’t be any happier than I was at this moment.

Chapter 28

Lucas

1 month later . . .

Aria and I walked hand-in-hand into Dan Howard’s office building. We’d been back from our honeymoon for only a week, and we were both still adjusting to L.A.’s fast pace. Those three weeks with Aria were undoubtedly the best of my life, and even though we were sad to return, we were ready to start our new life together.

I glanced around. The lobby was empty, and that surprised me a little. I half expected to see Sharon or even Calista, but no one was there besides Dan. It was time to find out what items I would be allowed to keep, and knowing my father, I probably wouldn’t get much.

I couldn’t help but feel down about it. Not that I regretted my choice one iota because I didn’t. I would have done it again in a heartbeat. But still, everything I’d worked so hard for in my dad’s business would be for nothing, and, yes, I’d gotten attached to a comfortable lifestyle. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t like having all the luxuries I’d grown accustomed to. With money came a lot of privilege and paring down from that would be a huge adjustment. I was willing and able to give it up, but I still felt a measure of loss.

Dan walked out to greet us. “Good to see you, Lucas.” He extended his hand, and I shook it. He turned his attention to Aria. “And who do we have here?”

“This is my wife, Aria. We got married a month ago.” I loved being able to introduce her as my wife wherever we went. It was one of the highlights of being newly married.

“Hi,” she said, smiling. “Nice to meet you.”

A pleased smile crossed his face. “Nice to meet you as well. You’re not one of the women on the list.” He glanced at me. “I guess that means you decided to marry for love and defy your father’s wishes.”

I nodded. “That’s right.”

He gave me a strange look like he hadn’t expected that out of me and then gestured for us to follow him into his office. “Have a seat.”

We both sat down and waited for him to settle in the chair behind his desk. “So,” he said, sounding more upbeat than I felt at the moment. “You defied the odds.”

I frowned. “What exactly do you mean by that?”

He laughed and seemed in no particular hurry to explain. He shifted in his chair and straightened paperwork on his desk.

I tapped my foot impatiently. Come on, let’s get this over with. I was anxious to be done with this so I could move on with my life. There was no point in losing sleep over this mess, but that didn’t mean it wouldn’t hurt like a hard sock to the gut. I would especially feel terrible that I couldn’t employ Sam anymore. But I would give him a letter of reference and use my connections to find him another job.

Dan pulled out an envelope from his desk drawer and handed it to me. “Since you married for love instead of meeting your father’s terms, this is the letter I’m supposed to give you.”

“How many letters did he write?”

“Four in total. You’ve already read the first, and now you have this one. The other two don’t apply.”

“Okay.” I ripped the seal and pulled out the folded paper.

Dear Lucas,

If you are receiving this letter, it means that you did not take advantage of the extra three months I gave you to marry one of the women on my list. It also means you have married someone else in defiance of my terms. I must assume you really love this woman if you are willingly giving up everything for her.

That was a stupid move. Don’t ever give up everything for a woman. That’s my advice. Do whatever you want with it. 

However, if you have defied me, I can only say I did my job well. You finally reached the point where you’re able to think for yourself, and you made a decision, knowing what the consequences would be. You always did what I asked, and while that was fine for a time, you needed to grow up.

If you have reached that point, then I would like to reward your efforts by granting you sixty-five percent of everything I owned. Calista will receive the other thirty percent, and Sharon will get the last five. Sharon won’t be happy about it, but see if I care. I won’t be around to hear her complain. Calista may be upset that it’s not an even split, but I don’t believe in equal rights for women and your sister knows that. As the new patriarch of this family, it’s your job to look out for her.

To be honest, I’m writing this mostly for my own amusement, and I seriously doubt you’ll ever read this particular letter because you love money too much. I’m sure you did whatever you had to do in order to marry one of those women.

But, if by chance, you are reading it, good for you.

I haven’t been the best father to you. I’m not offering any apologies because I’ve never apologized for who I am. Maybe you’ll follow in my footsteps, or perhaps, you’ll forge a different path for yourself. Either way, you just hit the jackpot.

Your father,

Howard Armstrong

I set the letter down on the desk and looked at Dan in disbelief. “I can’t believe . . . This is not what I expected.” I turned to Aria. “He gave me sixty-five percent of everything. More than what he originally said I’d get. Looks like we’re not going to be poor after all.”

Her eyes widened. “How can that be?”

I gave her the letter. “Read what it says.”

Dan chuckled. “Your old man had the last laugh. Everyone else thought they were benefiting off your poor choices, only it appears your choices weren’t poor after all.”

“What do the other two letters say?” I asked. “I’m just curious.”

He gave them to me to look over, and I scanned them both. Had I married one of the women on his list, I would have received forty percent of everything. If I hadn’t married at all, I would have received twenty percent. In both of those scenarios, Calista’s portion remained the same. Anger shot through me. She didn’t deserve to be treated that way.

I was just as angry that he didn’t think I’d ever break away from him, but then again, he’d never had much confidence in me. “He really didn’t believe I would do it, did he?”

Dan shook his head. “And I wasn’t allowed to say anything, though you may have caught my advice the last time you were here. I said, ‘Life is too short to worry about these things. Marry the woman you love and don’t look back.’”

“I remember that.”

“Now that everything has been settled. I can be more open about Calista’s terms.”

“All right.” I folded my hands on the edge of the desk.

“She is to receive thirty percent, but only if she marries a man from a list that was provided to her at our last meeting.”

Blood rushed through me in an instant. I clenched my fists and stood in a hurry. “Are you kidding me? How dare he?” I pounded the desk and then groaned, running a hand through my hair. “This just never ends, does it?”

Dan was a perfect picture of calm. Nothing seemed to rattle him. “Have a seat, Mr. Armstrong. Calista has a year to convince one of the men to marry her. If she doesn’t, that money will be donated to one of your father’s favorite causes, and there will be no pleasant surprises such as in your case.”

“He would do that to his own daughter?” I yelled. “I thought it was just me he hated.”

Dan shrugged. “I can’t speak to his motives. I’m only here to deliver the terms.”

Aria put a hand on my arm. “We’ll divide what we have with Calista. She doesn’t need to go through that.”

“Absolutely. I don’t want my sister to be forced to marry someone she doesn’t love.”

“What you do with your own money is up to you,” Dan said. “But Calista has reasons of her own to abide by your father’s wishes.”

“I don’t understand. What is that supposed to mean?”

“You’ll have to speak to Calista,” Dan said.

“She’s traveling in Europe,” I said, “and she hasn’t stayed in contact except for a postcard now and then to let me know she’s okay.”

“She received a travel fund from your father and one of the men . . .”

“Is in Europe,” I said, finishing his sentence.

“That’s correct.”

“Well, since she’s not responding back to my texts, will you tell her to call me?”

Dan smiled. “Of course.” He rose from his chair. “Meet with me again next week, and we’ll go over more of the specifics.”

We thanked him and left. On the way out to the car, I put my arm around Aria’s waist. “I just got used to the idea of living a simple life, and now I find nothing much has changed. I’m not sure if I should be happy or not.”

“It appears that God, in His providence, has allowed you to keep everything. It seems He wants you to use it for His glory.”

I nodded. “I think you’re right about that.” I whipped her around, so she was flush against my chest. Her breath caught just as I leaned down to hover over her lips. “You know the best part of this?”

She shook her head, gaze locked on mine, but she didn’t say anything—just stared at me with adoration in her eyes.

“Now I get to spoil you the way I’ve always wanted to.” I kissed her softly, tenderly, letting her know how precious she was to me. When I pulled away, we were both a bit breathless.

“If you really want to spoil me,” she said, “just keep laying on the kisses.”

I smiled. “Now that, I can do.”

Epilogue

Aria

7 months later . . .

“That’s great,” Lucas said, holding the phone close to his ear. He glanced at me and winked. He mouthed that he was almost done and then took another bite of the barbecue chicken pizza I’d made him.

We were in Kauai on vacation, having lunch in the gazebo at the house. Not doing much. Just enjoying the view and relaxing. Exactly how I wanted it.

A light breeze carried the scent of plumeria and fresh mint. I loved being back at this place. It had a way of rejuvenating me every time we visited. Especially because of the memories. Lucas and I had fallen in love here, and the sweetness of those days would forever be etched into my memory.

There had been a lot of uncertainty as well, but it only made me appreciate what I had now even more.

I’d had a stomach bug since we’d gotten here, but I was doing better today, and I just needed more rest. My immune system was probably weakening after working so hard at the restaurant. Not that I was complaining. I loved working with my brother, and I was actually pretty good at managing the place. Chase helped, but he preferred to be in the kitchen, and that was fine with me.

Emilio had hung around for several months, but once he saw Chase and I had everything under control, he’d gone for a long trip to Italy. He planned on returning soon, and we’d told him he was welcome to work part-time if he wanted to, and we really, really wanted him to. Chase and I had come to adore Emilio. He was one of those few people who had your back no matter what.

He said he’d think about it, but I was pretty sure we weren’t getting rid of him anytime soon. Emilio reminded me a lot of my father—kind and down to earth, but mainly he just made himself available to us. He’d called almost every day to find out how we were doing and if we needed his advice on anything. I appreciated that because running a restaurant wasn’t always easy.

“Thanks, Liam,” Lucas said. He shifted the plate on the table like he was trying to wrap up the conversation so he could get back to lunch. “I’m really excited about working with you. By the way, how did you get my cell phone number?” His brows flew up. “Really? I didn’t know that.”

I heard a low voice on the other end of the receiver. Lucas smiled. “Wow. I had no idea you and my sister even knew each other.” He nodded even though Liam obviously couldn’t see that. “Well, I’d better get going. My lovely wife just made lunch and I don’t want it to get cold. I’ll give you a call later in the week, and we can discuss our plans further.” He said goodbye and let out a long breath.

I took a small bite of pizza and chewed. My appetite had been down, but I knew I needed to eat something since I’d barely been able to keep anything down all week.

“That was Liam,” Lucas said. “He’s going to help me with the Lakeshore property.”

I stared at him in confusion. “Do I know Liam?”

“Oh, sorry. No, you two haven’t met. He called me a few months ago at the office. He heard through the grapevine that I’d like to build a community center on that property.”

“Oh, okay. I know which property you’re referring to now.” Lucas had previously shared with me that he had planned on constructing an office building on the land, but, at the time, he hadn’t been upfront about his plans with the man he’d purchased it from. He’d given his word that he would use the space for altruistic purposes, but that had never been his real intention. He’d since changed his mind on that and wanted to honor his promise.

“Yeah, Liam wants to start a second teen center for disadvantaged kids on the property,” he said. “There’s a lot more space, so we can expand the program. He said Alexa is currently developing a tutoring program that we can incorporate as well.”

“That’s awesome.” I got out of my seat to stand next to him, brushing his hair off his forehead. “Have I told you recently how proud of you I am?”

He smiled. “All the time.”

“Well, I really mean it. You’ve come a long way, Lucas. You’re starting to build a completely new reputation for yourself. And that was especially generous of you to give your stepmother the L.A. house after the way she treated you.” I leaned down and kissed him lightly on the cheek.

“It wasn’t that generous. The house has too many unhappy memories. I wouldn’t have wanted it, anyway.”

“But you could have sold it.”

“I know, but I’m making a conscious effort not to be like my father. Enough about that. Let’s get to the good stuff.” He drew me onto his lap and kissed me with the force of a man who didn’t do anything halfway. When he pulled away, he smiled. “I know you haven’t been feeling well, but I hope you’re still having a nice time.”

“I am. It comes and goes. Thankfully, right now I feel pretty good. I can never get enough of this place—you know that.”

He nodded. “In a few days we’re off to Idaho, and then after that, it’s back home. I know it was short this time, but we’ll come back soon.”

“It doesn’t matter where we are,” I said. “As long as I’m with you.” I rested my head on his shoulder, and he put his arms around me.

He grinned. “You took the words right out of my mouth.”

Lucas

The wind whipped through my hair as I stood with Aria on the Perrine Bridge, overlooking the Snake River in Twin Falls, Idaho. Anticipation swept through me as I looked down at the drop, four hundred and eighty-six feet below.

I made a noise in my throat and climbed over the railing. It had been a while since I’d done this jump. In fact, the last time had been right before I’d met Aria at the Coastal Heritage Museum. Glancing over my shoulder at her, I winked. “Make sure to take pictures.”

“Oh, I will.” She smiled, but it seemed half-hearted. And then she sobered. “Be careful. Please.” She nibbled on the corner of her lip, doing her best not to show her anxiety, but I knew it was there. I could see it in her eyes and the way she gripped her hands together in front of her.

“Always am, sweetheart. Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. See you in a few.”

I turned back, my heart thundering and crashing in my chest. For half a second, I considered climbing back over the railing and joining Aria, but that was fear speaking, and I wouldn’t let it rule me. So, instead, I jumped head first and did a flip. I pulled my parachute and enjoyed the slow descent down, taking in the wide expanse before me. There was a strong sense that God had me in His hands, that He loved me, and everything that had happened in my life up to this point was a part of His divine providence. The past would always hold a bit of sadness, especially as I still grappled with my abuse and the difficult relationship with my father. But I had an overwhelming amount of joy as I thought about the future.

When my feet touched the ground, my body didn’t tingle from the adrenaline rush like it normally did. I only felt an enormous peace.

Funny thing, that had almost been . . . anti-climactic.

Like the rush didn’t have the same thrill anymore.

I frowned, wondering what that was about.

After the ferry shuttled me back, I met Aria at the entrance to the bridge. She flew at me and hugged me like she’d nearly lost me. There were tears streaming down her face, and for several moments she didn’t speak. She just clung to me like I was her lifeline.

I ran my hand over her hair and tilted her chin back. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

“Don’t ever do that again. I thought I could handle it, but when you jumped . . .” A fresh stream of tears moistened her cheeks.

“I’ve done it dozens of times, and I know what I’m doing. Nothing would have happened.”

She pounded her fist on my chest, anger flashing in her eyes. “There’s always a risk. You can’t tell me there’s not. I’m not sure I can handle seeing you risk your life like that again. You mean too much to me. That was . . . that was . . .” She put a hand over her stomach. “I thought I was going to throw up.”

She loved me.

It was there in her eyes, in the angry expression on her face right now. She didn’t want to lose me. The thought made her ill.

Warmth flooded from my head all the way down to my toes. She really loved me. It wasn’t as if I didn’t know that already, but it was so evident, there was no way I could miss it.

And then I felt a whole new rush, more powerful than when I’d jumped.

Someone in this world cared about what happened to me. I was no longer alone.

Something else occurred to me. The jump had seemed anti-climactic because I hadn’t once thought about not pulling my parachute like I had all those other times. I’d lacked hope back then.

But I had it now.

I ran a hand up and down Aria’s back. “That’s the last time I’ll do it. I don’t want you to feel that way. Ever.”

We walked back to the car, my arm around her waist, neither of us saying a word. Finally, she sighed. “I’m sorry. I don’t want to hold you back. If it’s something you want to do, I won’t be the one that gets in the way.”

“You know what? I don’t want to do it anymore.”

She gave me a skeptical look. “You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”

I shook my head. “No, I’m not. I used to do it for the rush, as a way to escape my pain, except the pain was always still waiting for me when it was over. But this time,” I took her hand and tugged her close to me, “there was no pain—just a realization that I used to do it in order to run away, and I don’t need to run away anymore.”

I put my hands on both sides of her face and kissed her softly. Her arms went around my waist, and I deepened the kiss, my heart pulsing inside of me in a solid rhythm. When I pulled away, I ran my fingertips over her face. “From now on, that’s the only adrenaline rush I want.”

She smiled through her tears. “I’m glad to hear you say it because there are others who need you.”

“Like you.”

“Yes, like me.” She held my gaze steady. “And our baby.” She took my hand and placed it gently over her stomach, never taking her eyes off me.

“What?” My mouth dropped open. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

She nodded, a smile tipping her lips upward. “I was late, so I did a pregnancy test this morning. I wanted to tell you, but I was afraid the news might rattle you and you’d make a mistake during the jump.”

“Aria . . .” I lifted my hands to my head, my mouth wide open in shock. “That’s amazing. You’re amazing.” I kissed her again, my own eyes moistening from her announcement. “We’re going to have a baby. I can’t believe it.”

She laughed, wiping the corners of her eyes. “Yes. Yes, we are. You’re going to be a father.”

The thought was sobering, and a feeling of awe washed over me. “I want our child to always feel loved, to never doubt how much we care.”

“There was a time you didn’t believe in love,” she said, watching me closely.

I ran my fingers through her hair and kissed the corners of her mouth, her chin, her forehead. “There was, but now . . .”

“How is it now?” she asked, draping her arms around my neck.

“Now . . . It’s everything.”

***

Evangeline hopes you enjoyed, The Ruthless Billionaire. It’s the second in the California Elite Series. The first in the series, Collision of Wills, focuses on Alexa and Dylan’s story. Check out Collison of Wills now!

A snobby rich girl meets a rough around the edges artist. Can two people from completely different worlds come together?

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Other books written by Evangeline Kelly

The Unwanted Assistant

Love’s Sacrifice

Lawfully Protected

Road Trip

Shaken

Matchmaker